


Ten Nights

by HotaruGFC (JaclynGFC)



Category: Black Clover - 田畠裕基 | Tabata Yuki
Genre: Casual Sex, Developing Relationship, F/M, First Time, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2019-09-25 04:29:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 83,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17114498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaclynGFC/pseuds/HotaruGFC
Summary: It all started on her birthday. Her magic out of control and only stopped by one thing. It started simply, a rash decision, but for ten nights, over ten birthdays, Yami and Charlotte's relationship has evolved.





	1. Night One

He stood before her, towering over her with an odd smirk on his face. His shoulders were broad and his massive arms seemed too large for the delicate sword he held. The cigarette between his lips curled smoke across his face. His hair was unkempt, sticking out in all directions. He looked barbaric, uncivilized in his stained, sleeveless shirt and ragged cloak.

She had thanked him for his assistance, and she should have left. But she could not stop staring at him. She knew she shouldn't, but she could not pull her eyes away. He was so different from all of the other men she knew--in both physical prowess, appearance and in magical ability and technique. She knew he had a reputation for being crass, uncouth, and a touch destructive. She had heard rumors of his captain stepping in to help him avoid punishment for excessive damage done on missions.  
Looking at his arms as he sheathed the long narrow blade, she wondered what it would feel like to be wrapped in their embrace. She wagered he could crush her if he wanted to.   
Her heart raced as she realized she wanted him to try if only to feel his arms around her.

Her mother had asked her weeks ago what she had wanted for her birthday. She had not known what to say then. She was provided everything she could need in the squad. She had told her mother her only wish was to have the curse broken. But now, looking at him, she wished she had told her mother she wanted him to hold her if only to see what it would feel like.

She blushed at the thought and knit her brow together with an angry sigh.

Stupid, she thought to herself. When did you get to love-struck?

She sighed again as she recognized the words of disappointment and her father's voice echoing through her mind, only for a new situation.

"You're alright now, yeah?" He asked, his deep voice resonating with something buried within her. She could feel her whole body vibrate in response to him.

"Uh, yeah. Yes, I'm fine now. Thank you." She shuffled her feet, telling herself to leave. He looked at the ground and kicked a pebble with the toe of his boot.

"So, um, what happened?" He asked, his eyes never rising to meet hers. "It looked like your magic got out of control. After seeing you on the battlefield, it seems a little, I don't know, odd, I guess."

Her face reddened again.

"Um." She shifted between her feet and wrung her hands. Her eyes fell on the new stain on his dingy white shirt. "Didn't you say something about your soup being spilled?"

He looked at her then. She could feel the intensity of his gaze, even as she avoided looking into his eyes. She kept her focus on the dark stain at his waist.  
Though this view is probably not much better than his eyes, she thought as the fabric hugged his body tightly.

"Yeah, all the commotion, and I ended up wearing my noodles. The only reason I came out to investigate, in fact. Well, that and the screaming."

She grimaced.

"The least I can do is replace your lunch." She stated as she finally looked into his eyes again.

Mistake! She yelled at herself, internally, as she gasped for air. He was not traditionally handsome--not in the typical ways, but he had a rugged beauty she found breathtaking. 

And his eyes.

His eyes. They were black at the distance she saw them from, but she could see a strange intelligence in them she had never noticed before. Not that she had many opportunities to look into his eyes, of course. Not directly, not until now. He wrinkled his brow as she looked at him as if he were trying to figure out what to do next.

"Yeah, I guess that is the least you can do." He said. She had expected something boorish from him, given his reputation. He did not disappoint. He turned abruptly and began walking away from her. She stood rooted to the spot, confused.

"Well? Aren't you coming?" He said over his shoulder. His voice was like a command and she snapped out of the daydream she had felt herself slipping into. She took a couple of long strides to catch up to him, thankful for her own height for a change. Seeing her moving, he started walking again. She watched him move from a pace behind, thinking the view from the back was just as nice as the one from the front. She rubbed the backs of her hands with her cheeks as she felt them grow warm.

"Lead on, then." Her voice sounded shaky and unsteady in her ears. She glanced at him, wondering if he had heard it too, but his attention was on the path before them. She chewed on her lip as she walked with him.

"Yami?" She asked.

He grunted in response. She felt all thoughts all words flew her mind as he glanced at her.

"What were you doing way out here anyway?" She stumbled over a crack in the cobblestone. His hand shot out and grabbed her arm, keeping her from falling to the ground. She felt her breathing stop at the touch and her entire body warmed as she grew flushed.

"I was on a mission a few towns over. Julius recommended this place, so I thought I would try it." He released her once she was steady.

She marveled at his speed and wondered if he knew what he was doing to her.

He turned into a small hole in the wall restaurant she had never noticed before. She hesitated a moment before following him through the curtained entrance. The smells hit her as soon as she pushed the fabric aside. Cardamom, anise, and turmeric. Spicy smells mixed with a touch of something else she could not identify, but which her belly responded to by growling loudly. Her mouth watered at the scent almost as much as it did when looking at him. He had taken a seat at the empty counter and was motioning to the cook behind it by the time she found her senses and joined him.

The old wrinkled greasy man behind the counter looked at her as she took the seat next to the massive man who had saved her, who had saved them all. He leaned closer to Yami and whispered something which she could not hear, but it made Yami knit his brows together and glance at her.

"No, this is fine right here," he told the old man who shrugged before turning his attention to taking their order. When the old man came to her to ask what she wanted, he stopped and gasped, having now gotten a good look at her face.

"My Lady, I am honored you have come to my establishment. Years ago, before you were born, your grandmother was kind enough to help me with a small loan to open the restaurant here. I will never forget her kindness."

She smiled, knowing the story was likely true as her grandmother had made a habit of helping those with big dreams and little resources. Charlotte had long ago learned how much it had vexed her father when the matriarch of the family would go help others without his consent.

"Well then, your food must be good, if my grandmother helped you out."

"I shall prepare her favorite dish for you, then." He turned to Yami sitting next to her. "Would you like to try as well?"

She felt his eyes on her for a long moment, and the smoke he exhaled in her general direction made her cough. Her heart raced as he looked at her, and she felt the warming of her core. Her tongue darted out between her lips, wetting them before she swallowed hard. Her cheeks flushed--she was certain of it--but he continued to look at her. She could not imagine what he was thinking, though a part of her wished she could read his mind.

"Nah, just a replacement soup is fine." He told the cook and owner without taking his eyes off of her. "Are you okay?" He asked her on another exhale of his cigarette. She coughed again.

"I'm fine. Just fine, except you keep blowing that in my face." She hardened her eyes as she looked at him in an effort to protect herself. He stuck the cigarette back between his lips and she found herself staring at them.

A new thought popped into her mind, of those lips on hers, on her skin, on other places. She scratched at her neck and ear as her tongue darted between her lips once more. Her entire body tingled in anticipation and desire. She wanted him. She wanted him in a way she had never wanted another man ever. Even the noble suitors her father had tried to match her with--the men she should have wanted, the men who were socially acceptable for her to want--had never made her feel like she did when she looked at him.

Is it just that? she wondered. Is it because my father would disapprove because he's not who I should want?

"Sorry." He said as he turned his head to exhale away from her. Her heart skipped a beat and she gasped slightly. His words to her as he cut down her mass of thorns echoed in her mind. His impressions of her on the battlefield, his admonishment of her trying to do everything herself instead of trusting in others, his respect of her.

And she realized she wanted him for far more than just a rebellious fling--though it didn't hurt matters any that her father would hate him. He had done the one thing which should have been priority number one for her parents when looking for a suitor for her but had failed to account for. He respected her--as a person, as a mage, as a knight.

And, despite his crude, boorish behavior, Charlotte realized she respected him as all of those things, too.

She knew what it meant when he had broken the curse. She knew he had stolen her heart, that she had fallen for him. And since then, her mind had gone down many paths she had not planned on--not about any man, especially not regarding him.

She had not been prepared for how completely and desperately attracted to him she was, nor the deep respect she had for him. Yes, she wanted him, she wanted to feel what it would be like to be with him, to have his arms around her, to kiss his lips. But she also wanted more.

She glanced at him again as the old man placed a bowl of soup before him. He started eating, oblivious to her soul searching and dilemma. The soup smelled amazing and was flush with noodles, bits of meat and vegetables in a clear broth. He slurped the noodles up in a way which made her cringe, but which made the old man smile as he placed a dish before her. Clear noodles lay on the plate, tossed with meat and vegetables and topped with a thick brown sauce. A delicately carved turnip sat on top of the pile of food--a white rose among the vines. Tiny seeds were scattered around the noodles, looking every bit like thorns. Charlotte smiled as she looked at the beautiful, simple dish.

Not only was did it look pretty, but the smell emanating from the plate was also heavenly. She could not quite describe it aside from being both spicy and sweet.

"Your grandmother's favorite dish." The old man grinned at her.

"It smells wonderful." She pierced a piece of carrot with her fork and carefully bit into it. Flavors burst on her tongue and her eyelids slid closed as she savored the bite.

"It's very good." She said, covering her mouth with her hand. The old man grinned even more and she felt Yami's eyes on her. She took another bite.

"Young Miss, I'm surprised you were out in the town today, and not preparing for the party. It isn't right for the birthday girl to be late to her own celebration."

She took another bite and frowned--despite the exquisite taste in her mouth.

"Birthday?" Yami asked between slurps and glances at her. Her skin prickled with both.

"Indeed. The young miss here turns eighteen today."

Charlotte laid her fork down, sighing.

"Weird," Yami said, lifting the bowl to his lips and sipping the broth.

"What's weird about it?" She turned to face him.

"What? Nothing, I mean. Happy Birthday." He sipped again, his eyes, dark orbs above the bowl's rim, not leaving hers.

"That didn't sound like nothing." She picked up the fork once more.

"It's just," He put the empty bowl down and rubbed the back of his head before pulling a cigarette from a pouch on his waist. "Yesterday was my birthday."

"I'm surprised you were way out here on a mission on your birthday." She scooped up a fork full of noodles and stuffed them into her mouth. She tried to avoid slurping them, but could not.

He shrugged as he lit the cigarette, inhaled deeply and exhaled, turning his head away from her to avoid blowing the smoke into her face or food. She could not help the small smile which crept over her face as she noticed the slight change in his behavior.

"I don't really do birthdays anyway."

"That's sad." She felt a twinge of pain and loneliness at the thought. He shrugged again before glancing at her.

"It's no big deal really. I don't have any family to celebrate with, or really any friends either, except for Julius. In the end, it's like any other day."

"Maybe." She took a bite of her noodles. As she threw propriety to the wind and slurped the end of the skinny string through her lips, she noticed him looking at the pile of food before her. "You want some? I don't think I can finish it all."

"Maybe a bite." He took the fork he had been given but had not used and stabbed it into a vegetable he could not recognize through the sauce which smothered it. He held his cigarette between his fingers as he bit the morsel from the fork.

"It's good, right?" She asked before taking another bite herself. She watched as he closed his eyes a moment, savoring the flavor, before attacking another bite with the fork.

"Yeah. Julius was right about this place."

She pushed the plate between them, making it easier for them to share. Their forks diving again and again into the pile of noodles until the plate was empty. As she slurped the last of the noodles between her lips, the end of the starchy strand whipped upwards into her nose. He giggled as the tip of it was smeared with sauce before he used a napkin to wipe it away.

"Thanks." She blushed as she wiped the tip with her hand.

"No problem." He was smiling as he looked at her.

A clock tower chimed in the distance, and Charlotte's face fell.

"Ugh. I don't want to go to the stupid party." She sighed. She knew her parents would introduce her to several potential suitors during the event. And now she was eighteen, they would be putting the pressure on her even more to make a decision regarding the future of the family. As the sole heir, she had certain expectations to which she had to live up--including producing an heir herself.

But all she wanted now was to do her duty as a magic knight, to use her magic to guard and protect the people of the kingdom. Even if she had nearly failed to do so today, she still felt it was a worthy goal.

She hated all of the men her parents picked for her. They were all weak-willed and stupid. They all valued her beauty and her name more than her strength. They could never have broken the curse. She wanted nothing to do with them. She refused to give them anything of herself. She looked over at the man next to her, the man whose words had triggered something within her, the man who had stopped the curse from coming to fruition. She looked at him and made a decision. It was a selfish decision, one her parents would chastise her for later, but she didn't care.

"Yami, I know you said birthdays are like any other day in the end, but," She could feel the warmth in her cheeks betraying her as she bit her lip. "I wanted to give you something anyway. Part birthday present, part thank you."

"What are you talking about?" He turned to her then, his cigarette tightly gripped between his fingers.

She kissed him quickly, awkwardly. She had never kissed a man before and wasn't quite sure what she was doing, but she had hit her mark, albeit stiffly. He froze for only a second before he kissed her back, gently moving his lips against hers. His hand cupped her cheek and pulled her toward him as the kiss moved from gentle to desperate. She felt a numbness pass through her body, a tingling, like pins and needles, as she gave herself over to the desire she had felt building since she had first seen him today. She brushed her fingers over his chest as he pulled at her waist, drawing her into him. His tongue pressed against her lips demanding entry as his hand slipped through her hair and around the back of her neck. She felt a throbbing through her nethers as she opened her mouth to the further demands of the kiss. Her hands slipped over the soft fuzzy fabric which made up the mantle of his squad before they wrapped around his thick neck and shoulders. Her fingers twisted into his hair as she pushed her tongue between his lips, demanding the same opportunities he had been given.

After a long moment, he forced his lips from hers. He was breathing heavy as he looked at her. His eyes--already dark in color, were nearly black as he gazed at her. A fire burned behind them, dark, brooding, but full of desire held at bay, like a hunting dog ready to take to the field.

"What was that for?" His voice was rough, breathless. His eyes kept darting between her eyes and her lips. She slipped her hands from his neck to the tops of his shoulders. His grip on her waist had not slacked, however.

"I told you. It was your birthday present."

He gasped slightly before licking his lips.

"You didn't have..."

She kissed him again, but this time he did not hesitate to kiss back. His hands slid up her back and pulled her tight to his chest. His arms squeezed her, holding her in a perfect sense of balance. She felt she could stay in his arms forever and be happy. She smiled against his lips at the feeling. She could feel his desire too, as he pressed his hips against hers. She knew, on an intellectual level at least, what happened when a man was aroused, but she had never felt it before. Her curiosity grew with his erection as she moved her hands from his shoulders around his back to his waist and beyond. She wanted to explore him further, but his grimoire pouch blocked her hands from their target.

"What are you trying to do?" He breathed in her ear, his voice barely audible over the beating of her heart as he pushed her back against the counter where they had eaten.

"I thought it was obvious." Her voice was as breathless as his.

"Oh, geez. Get a room." The old man behind the counter laid a key on a long woven rope on the counter-top behind them. Charlotte smiled a challenge to him as she bit on her lower lip and quirked her eyebrows upward. Yami looked at her for a moment--her flushed cheeks, her sparkling eyes turned obsidian with desire. Her hands had moved again and now wrapped around his neck once more, where her fingers stroked his face, neck, and back of his head. She touched him wherever she could get to his skin. She slipped one hand beneath the squad mantle and over his shoulder, which would have been bare but for it. He sucked in a quick breath at the electric nature of her touch. He had never felt a spark quite like he did when she touched him--and he had fought lightning mages. Charlotte, however, was something different.

He swiped the key from behind her and turned to the stairs on the far side of the narrow restaurant. He pulled her behind him, giggling as she followed.

Charlotte held tight to his hand, giddy with anticipation. She had never planned for this to happen--for another to break the curse, much less for that person to be him, or for her to have made such a decision so rashly. But she had. She would give him everything he wanted, for both of their desires.

The door closed loudly behind her and he pushed her back against it. The weight of him crushed her against the door and his lips dove to her skin. She gasped as he grazed her ear, her neck. She had felt desire before, but now she was flooded with it. She wanted him, and she would not leave until she got what she wanted. She pushed him back, holding him at arm's length, but lifting his weight from against her as she guided him toward the narrow rickety bed in the tiny room.

"You sure you want this?" His voice was unsteady as he landed heavily on the thin mattress. She straddled his lap and kissed him as she pushed him against the narrow bed. Some part of her mind wondered how this was all going to work on such a small bed. The rest of her would have fucked him on the floor if she had to. She fumbled with the belt holding on his grimoire satchel, sword, and pants as she pressed her chest against the thin, dingy white shirt he wore. His large hand gripped her rear and lifted her up somewhat as she struggled. His hands slipped underneath the skirt of her tunic and then over the waist of her pants. His fingertips barely brushed her flesh, but the touch--minute as it was, made her gasp. 

"Absolutely." She smirked at him as the belts finally came free in her hands. She pushed him roughly backward and held him down with her weight as she kissed him once more. He forced himself up to his elbows and wiggled himself out from underneath her a tiny bit, just enough to get leverage. He pawed at her own trappings, trying to free her flesh, but between the lacing and layers, he grunted in frustration. Charlotte sat up and shed her clothing as quickly as she could. Almost instantaneously, she felt his lips on her breasts as the cool air in the room, or perhaps it is the nearness of him, gave her goose-prickles. She stood up once more and stripped off the rest of her outfit until she stood bare before him. She watched as his eyes traveled down her naked body and back up again. She took in a shaky breath as his coarse fingertips brushed over the skin of her belly, hip and around to her back as he stood with her. Once he had met her eyes, she held them in her gaze as he finished stripping his own gear until he stood to face her. 

Charlotte's heart raced as she looked him over, returning the favor. She trailed her hand down his chest and the light smattering of hair that covered it until she reached the top of his thigh. She could feel the muscles tense and quiver as her fingers brushed over them. She chewed on her lip as her fingers hesitated at his thigh. She wanted to touch him, to stroke him, to engulf his manhood, firm and erect. It begged for her attention.

"I won't hurt you, Charlotte." His voice was a soft whisper, as soft as the light stroking of his fingertips along her shoulders and arms.

Encouraged, she ran the tips of her fingers over the thick shaft to the end which was wet and oozing fluids. Her tongue darted out between her lips as she ran her fingers over the tip. He made a sound that was part groan and part purr as she touched him before his lips found a tender spot where her neck met her shoulder and his hands pulled her closer to him. She gasped at the feeling of his erection pushing between her legs as he pulled her hips closer. He hadn't entered her yet, but the nearness of him ignited a fire within her sex. She wanted more. She wanted to feel what it was like to have him inside her. She wanted to claim that from him, to take it, not so much by force, but in a sense of mutual domination. She pushed him back to the bed and straddled him once more. Only this time, she gripped his member and rubbed its tip against herself. With each stroke of the tip of him against her, she felt herself gasp until she could bear it no longer. She positioned herself over him and settled back onto his hips, allowing him to push deep inside of her, stretching and filling her slowly as she sank onto him. Her breathing grew shallow at the sensation, so similar to how she pleasured herself, and yet so very different. She sat there, allowing herself to grow comfortable with the feel of him within her before she opened her eyes. 

His eyes were slits and his chest rose and fell rapidly. He groaned as she rocked her hips back and forth. He licked his lips and his fingers scratched at her thighs. He gasped or groaned with every movement, slowly rocking his own hips into hers as she rose and fell. She gasped at the sudden change in motion as he pushed himself deeper. She whimpered at the sudden thrust.

"Sorry," he muttered before going still once more and letting her take her pleasure in him. The evening sun filtered into the room in golden orange rays which set her blond hair aflame and turned her skin golden. With every movement her breasts bounced until he cupped them with his hands, pressing them to her chest until they stilled. He rubbed her nipples with the tips of his calloused fingers making her gasp loudly until he felt her go still. Her eyes closed and her brow knit together. Her lips pursed and her entire body seemed to shudder as he felt her tighten around his erection, once, twice, three times and more. He watched as her body relaxed, as every clenched muscle smoothed except for the satisfied smile dancing on her lips. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly before she leaned forward and nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck. She kissed his jaw lazily, sleepily and then nibbled on his ear a bit. He stroked her back before turning her over and kissing her deeply once more. He kissed her over and over as he slowly thrust into her. He wanted to keep doing both, but he couldn't quite get purchase to find his own release while kissing her. He drew one of her legs--long and lean, up until her ankle rested on his shoulder. Kissing the thin joint and sliding his hand down to her thigh and hip, he pushed himself deep into her, finding his rhythm with every moan and gasp that escaped her throat. He found release far more quickly than he expected as she whispered his name and her hands slipped over his chest and belly. Her eyes danced as he hovered over her, hunting for a kiss before he withdrew from her and let sleep claim him. He shifted to his back and pulled her onto his chest, wrapping her in his arms.

"Happy Birthday, Charlotte," he mumbled as she nestled herself next to him, tucking her leg over his.

"Happy Birthday, Yami." she sighed as she drifted off to sleep.

***

He stirred a while later, not certain of how much time had passed since they had collapsed in an exhausted heap from their active explorations of each other. She lay curled next to him, partially on top of him and partially wedged into the narrow space between him and the bar which marked the edge of the cot. His arm was pinned beneath her and he could feel the prickles of numbness in his fingertips. Still, he stroked her skin along her back as best he could. Slowly he shimmied himself from beneath her and stood. He stretched and yawned before scratching his neatly trimmed nails over his bare belly. He sighed as a feeling of contentment washed over him. He felt sated in a way he had not felt in a long time. Not since that fateful dinner with Julius, where the older man had taken him under his wing, had Yami ever felt so satisfied. The reason was different, of course. The dinner satisfied his growling belly with food far richer and more abundant than he had ever had since he washed ashore. 

Tonight, he found a different kind of satisfaction. He couldn't quite put a finger on it, but something about being with her, tonight, was different from all the other times he had been with someone. He could already feel his desire nibbling at his mind, whispering how easy it would be to simply lay with her some more, to breath her in, to kiss her, to fuck her more. He ran his hand through his hair before he began his search for his clothes. 

He stumbled around in the darkness as he felt around on the floor for his gear. Except for a tiny window through which a stream of silvery moonlight passed, the room was completely dark. Fortunate for his search, the moon was full. Unfortunately for his need to report in within a reasonable timeframe, the light struck her pale body, casting her in its silvery glow. 

He had not intended to look at her before leaving--he made it a habit to not look when he left a woman sleeping--but the way the moonlight reflected off of her skin, her hair drew him like a moth to a flame. He had caught a glimpse of her as he was looking for his pants, and then again as he was pulling them on. He stopped and stared at her, his thin shirt in hand, but made no move to finish his task. 

She had rolled onto her back, and her face was turned toward him. Her lips were plump and slightly parted, and he thought he could still see a slight flush on her cheeks. Her crystalline blue eyes were closed, of course, and her normally golden hair had paled to silver in the light. 

In every way, she was light, refinement, and beauty, while he was the coarse darkness. At least on the outside. He reached down and brushed the tips of his fingers against her cheek, dragging a few loose strands of hair away from her face. He smirked as the memory of her earlier aggressiveness rose to the surface. The thought drove away any satiety he had felt and in its place stood a hunger the likes of which he had never experienced from lack of food. He licked his lips as his gaze traveled down her naked body. His eyes lingered on her breasts and he felt an itching in his hands to squeeze them and a need for his lips to suckle at them, for his tongue to explore them. With great effort, he drew his attention further down her body. Her belly was flat and smooth and it glowed in the moonlight. Silvery hair curled above the spot where her legs met, but he could not see any further because of how she was angled in the narrow cot. 

He groaned deep in the back of his throat and chastised himself for looking at her. He knew better than to look, he told himself silently. Part of his mind still yammered at him to get dressed and get out before she woke up. But he was frozen to the spot, torn between leaving and staying. He wanted to touch her again, to kiss her lips to feel her body surround him as she took her pleasure in him and he in her. 

He sighed and tossed the shirt to the ground before squeezing back into the narrow cot with her. He tucked her into his arms and held her tightly against him. Closing his eyes, he tried to bring forth sleep instead of the desire tickling the back of his mind. But when she tilted her head upward and kissed his neck, he knew it would be a battle he would lose. Her hands on his chest, her leg slithering over his, pulling him closer, entwining them together like the thorn vines she had entwined through the city streets earlier, every place her body touched his, he burned. He pushed her back against the narrow cot. His hands pressed against her shoulders, pinning her to the bed. She opened her eyes with a challenging grin, but he saw it for only a moment before his lips captured hers. She gasped when he entered her again, her inhalation sucking the air from around him. The sound made him light-headed and her hands on his shoulders, her fingernails digging into his flesh like tiny thorns, stilled him for a moment. The feeling of her surrounding him, her legs tightening on his hips, drawing him more deeply within her, drove him wild. He wanted to fuck her with all the ferocity of desire her every touch brought to him, but her hands demanded stillness. Her sighs and tiny moans as she gyrated beneath him ordered his patience. He kissed her again, falling from his hands onto his elbows as he framed her body with his arms. 

With each movement, she brought herself closer and closer to release. He could hear it in her voice, feel it in the way her body tensed beneath him. He pushed himself back and pulled her hips against him until she cried out as he filled her. And still, she twisted and wiggled against him. He brought her legs from around his waist to rest on his chest. He nibbled on her ankle as he slowly withdrew and thrust into her again and again. 

"Yami..." she cried breathlessly as he slipped his thumb into the soft blond curls topping her sex. He kissed her ankle again as she cried out and bit her lip. He had found it, the right spot and as he stroked it, he could feel her tighten, pulsing around him. She came silently, with heavy breathing and closed eyes. He slipped her legs from his shoulders and dove in for another kiss as he continued his steady rhythm, once her body had calmed. He cupped her breast and brought it to his lips. He sucked and teased, his tongue flicking over her hardened nipples until she squealed and squirmed beneath him once more. First one, and then the next. Her fingers clawed at his back, simultaneously pulling him closer and trying to drive him away. 

The cot creaked beneath them as he continued. He wanted to release himself, but he also wanted to watch her squirm so more--this little noblewoman who always looked down on others, on men especially, who acted like she never needed anyone and fought so hard to make that true, this beautiful woman who from the first time he saw her he wanted if only to teach a lesson to or so he thought at the time, this angel of a being, glorious and magnificent, who made him feel things he had never felt and could not describe. He wanted to fuck her forever. 

The handful of others he had been with, common women and nobles alike, had never made him feel quite the same. He wanted to crawl up inside of her and live there if he could. He wanted to hold her in his arms forever. He wanted to submit to her. As far as he could remember, the only other person he had ever submitted to in any way was Julius, when he offered to take in a young boy washed ashore in a strange land and give him a life of meaning. He had turned himself over to the time mage then, vowing to give him everything he could.

Now, looking down at her face as he pushed her over the edge of pleasure once more, he wanted to give everything else to her. As she tightened on him once more, with the thought of surrender encompassing his mind, he let go. Her legs tightened once more against his hips, holding him deep inside as he pulsed, releasing his essence within her. She smiled up at him, not the challenging smirk from before, but a tender, gracious smile. He found himself smiling back. She brushed her fingers along his cheek and around his neck before pulling him down into her and kissing him. The kiss was slow and gentle and filled with promise. He had never been kissed like that before. The memory of it made him smile as he nestled himself next to her, his limbs wrapping around her protectively as he drifted off to sleep once more. 

***

The sun was high in the sky, higher than when she was used to waking in any case, as Charlotte blinked in the light of day. She felt crowded and cramped. Her body ached with exhaustion, but despite her weariness, she felt good. Pleased. Sated. Happy. 

She tried to roll onto her back, but the combination of the narrow bed and large other occupant made moving difficult. She wasn't quite sure how, but she managed to push herself up to sitting and get herself out of the narrow bed without falling to the floor. She stretched in the mid-morning sunlight which filtered into the otherwise dark room through a narrow and dirty window. The rays of light made the dust particles dance in the air like tiny sparkles of magic leftover from the night before. She could not help the smile on her lips as she hunted around the room for her clothing. 

The bells in the town chimed the hour and the sound startled her. They also startled Yami, who until the moment they had run had been sleeping deeply. He bolted up in the bed, his eyes frantically searching for something. He panted as if he had been running for a long distance and his hand wrung the thin blanket he had covered them with into scrunched fistfuls of fabric. As the sound ended and the last of the echoing rings faded, he seemed to grow calm once more. Charlotte quickly finished lacing her bodice as she watched him.

"Are you alright?" Her voice sounded more concerned than she thought it should and she wondered if something happened last night to change her. She felt different, at least a little bit. She also felt it would be hard to explain not only her actions but how she felt different now because of them.

He took a deep breath and nodded. His eyes traveled the length of her now fully clothed body as he looked at her. Charlotte wasn't sure but she thought he frowned.

"Yeah, just... just a bad dream." He swung his legs over the side of the bed and pulled on his pants. Seeing his half-naked body once more gave Charlotte a rush of desire. She closed her eyes and bit her lip in an effort to hold it down. 

"Oh." 

Now that the rush of insanity which had driven her the night before had subsided, Charlotte could imagine her parent's anger with her for not coming home last night. She wondered if she should just go back to headquarters without stopping in to see them. She could claim she had been recalled suddenly. Neither had served as Magic Knights, they would have no idea about how things worked. The plan was plausible and would be easy to implement, but for one thing. Charlotte did want to see her grandmother, even if she could care less about what her parents told her. 

"So, um..." Yami spoke nervously as he fastened his complex belt system around his waist. "What are you planning to do now?" Charlotte thought the words sounded hollow and stiff in his mouth. She wondered the same thing.

"I guess I should go home and face the music." Charlotte pulled her hair back in a severe bun. "I'm sure I'll never hear the end of it from my parents for not coming home last night."

"I should probably get back to headquarters, I guess." He fastened his cloak about his shoulders. "Julius is probably starting to wonder why I'm late." Charlotte nodded. She wondered how she was going to explain what happened to her own captain. She decided she would only tell people on a need-to-know basis. 

"Probably." She turned to him and made the mistake of looking into his eyes. She could see the entire universe in his near black orbs. She felt her breath catch as they looked at each other. "So, Yami, what does all this mean?" 

Charlotte wasn't entirely sure what she wanted it to mean.

"What are you talking about?"

"For us? What does it mean?" She couldn't bring herself to describe what he had done to her, with her. She flicked her eyes away from him, looking down at the floor, at the window or door--anywhere but him. Looking at him made her blush from the memory of his body over hers, of his lips on her skin. He was quiet for a while, the only sound was the grunting he made as he pulled his boots on. She glanced back to him briefly, seeing his brow knit in thought as he took a cigarette out from a pouch at his belt.

"It doesn't have to mean anything." He flicked open a small box which blossomed into flame as his finger ran over it in a practiced motion. Touching the fire to the end of the small cylinder protruding from his lips, he inhaled deeply. She watched as he closed his eyes and exhaled as he tucked the small metal box back into the pouch near his belt. His face relaxed in a way that reminded her of how he looked the night before, similar, but not quite the same. 

Charlotte nodded and wrinkled her eyebrows together. Her rash thinking from before had evaporated in the light of the new day. She took stock of what she was feeling, setting aside each individual emotion into their own little boxes as she acknowledged them.

"You don't regret it, do you?" His voice had taken on an edge of panic within the otherwise hollow flat sound. When she met his eyes again, however, they were as cool and inscrutable as they had been when he sliced away the briars and made a path into her heart. 

Did she regret her actions, giving into her wanton desires? 

She shook her head.

"No." She could feel her heart racing again at the memory of his arms around her. She wanted to feel them once more. She had never felt so safe, so protected in her life as she had in his arms--at least not that she could remember. He took a step forward.

"It can just be for fun, Charlotte." 

She met his eyes again, nodding. The movement of the cigarette back and forth to his lips drew her attention from his eyes. She wanted to kiss him again, to replace his cigarette with her lips, but the thought spiraled out of control from kissing to more far too quickly. He shuffled forward once more.

"And it was fun." He licked his lips as the war she waged with herself was equally evident on his face. "At least, I thought it was." He broke eye contact as a light blush graced his cheeks, though through his darker skin it was less obvious. 

"It was..." Amazing, incredible, glorious, all ran through her mind as ways to describe what she had felt with him. And all were words which would make it more difficult to leave. She took a deep breath, her eyes running over his jaw and neck where small purple bruises had formed. She hadn't realized it at the time, but she must have bitten him at some point in their communion. She tried to think back to when she might have done so and felt the wave of desire strike her once more. She crossed her arms over her chest, hugging herself. "It was good." She settled on at last.

A sad smile spread over his lips as if he had expected the answer but wasn't entirely happy with it.

"I guess we should go before people start to get really worried." 

The small restaurant on the first floor of the building was nearly empty, save for the owner and an old woman sitting alone at a table drinking tea. The woman looked old enough to be either of their grandmothers, but she also seemed familiar somehow to Yami. He watched her as he passed by, but the woman's attention was focused on the cup of steaming liquid in her hands. Yami wrinkled his brow as he turned his attention back to Charlotte as she spoke to the owner behind the counter.

"I'm sure you are hungry." The old man said with a wink and a twinkle in his eye which made Charlotte blush and look away embarrassed. 

Yami grinned as his stomach growled on cue. He wanted to ask her to stay, to nuzzle her neck and lay kisses along her skin. He took a long drag on his cigarette. 

It was a one-time thing, he told himself as he watched her stiffen under his gaze. She's not yours. Though looking at her, he very much wished she was. 

"No thank you. I, um, I have to go." She forced a smile at the old man before Yami was captured in her sparkling blue eyes. She looked at him, cool, collected, disdainful on the surface as she pulled her mask back in place, but he could see something more, a fire burning beneath the surface. He could practically feel her trembling the air in the space between them as she whetted her lips.

"I, um, I'll see you around sometime, I guess." Her voice had the slightest quiver to it. 

"Yeah. See you around." He said around the cigarette nestled between his lips. They stared at each other for a moment, both feeling like something else needed to be said, but not knowing what. He wanted to kiss her and from the way, her eyes kept darting to his lips, he wondered if she wanted the same. But for the cigarette between his lips, he probably would have. He wanted to take it out, to clear the cloud of smoke building in his lungs, but he did not know if he could control himself if the tiny fiery barrier did not stand between them. She was right; they both had to leave the little haven they had found in the noodle shop together.

She nodded as she looked to the ground and turned to the door. In an instant, she was gone and Yami took the cigarette from between his lips and let out a long exhale as he watched the curtained flaps marking the doorway swing from her passing until they stilled.

"You should go after her." The old woman from the corner said over her cup of tea.

His body tensed as if he were preparing to run or fight. He wanted to chase her down, to pull her to him and kiss her until the world ended. Instead, he turned to the counter and the old man behind it. Yami placed an order as he sat on the stool he had occupied the night before. He could see the disappointment on the old man's face as he turned to the open kitchen and began to cook.


	2. Night Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One year later, Yami and Charlotte have a bit of a run-in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a forewarning... I was writing the end of this while drinking sake, on new year's eve. and I posted it almost immediately afterward. If there's any weird grammar, I'm sorry and please let me know. I might go fix it later when I'm not drinking sake...

 Yami stood with Julius after having neutralized the enemy when she stormed up the slope. 

"And what exactly did you think you were doing? I had the situation completely in hand and you come in and spoil everything." She was irate as she glared at him. She took her anger at the lost mark on him, Yami thought, so she would not have to face down a captain, especially one as powerful as Julius. 

"Sorry, I was just doing what I was told to do. You know, take down the bad guy?" 

Charlotte narrowed her blue eyes at him. Her cheeks were flushed red and splotchy with emotion; her lips were pursed in frustration. He hadn't seen her in nearly a year--not since her last birthday when things had, well to say things had gotten out of hand would have been an understatement. Her magic had gone haywire and he had stopped it. He had thought at the time that would have been the end of it. But afterward... Well, the memory was pleasant, and one he kept tightly guarded.

Looking at her flashing eyes now, he wondered what strange magic had been at work a year ago, because he could see none of the desire in her eyes she had had that night.

She was still yelling at him, letting her voice vent the frustration in a way her magic had been blocked from doing. Julius had already started to back away, though Yami could sense his mentor's observational gaze on them both. 

"Listen, I'm sorry, Charlotte. I saw an opportunity and I took it. I can't change matters now." He could feel his voice rising to match hers until he bellowed through the forest and it echoed from the bare mountainside facing them on the other side of the river. The overlook on which they stood was heavily wooded for the most part, yet it jutted out over the water below in a narrow spit. The enemy scout had fallen from the narrow edge into the raging water below after Yami had cleaved his chest in two. There was no sign of the body any longer, as it had been pulled downriver by the rapid current frothing over hidden rocks beneath the surface.

"You know, for all the skill you claim to have reading the situation, you sure are incompetent."

"How was I supposed to know you were hunting him as well?" Yami pressed her, not realizing how close they were both getting to the edge as she inched backward with each of his steps. He could tell she gave up her ground reluctantly. "It's not like the different squads actually talk to each other or anything." He inched forward as she prepared for her counter-argument. 

But the argument never came.

Instead, the ground beneath her, the thin edge of the precipice jutting out over the raging river below, softened now from recent rainfall, collapsed into the water below. 

And Charlotte fell with it.

The look in her eyes had shifted from anger to terror as she realized what was happening. She reached out for him as the inevitability of her fall dawned upon her. But she was too late. She landed in the water with a splash that could not be heard over the roar of the rapids, her head hitting a rock which stuck out of the water like an out of place stalactite. 

Yami stared at the spot where she once stood for a heartbeat as his mind processed what had happened. In the second heartbeat, he had stripped himself of his sword and grimoire. In the third, he hit the water.

He could hear Julius calling after him, but his voice was quickly drowned out by the gurgling of the water around him. Further downstream, Yami could see her limp body floating among the rocks and debris in the water. He swam as quickly as he could through the minefield of the rapids, grateful for the current pushing him along. After what felt like an eternity, he finally caught her. He grabbed her around the waist and held her head above water. He pulled her from the water as quickly as he could, but when he looked upstream, he could see nothing of the area where she had fallen.

He looked at her noting her bluing lips and her complete and utter stillness. She was going to die if he didn't do something about it. He had learned long ago, before his shipwreck, when he lived with his family, of techniques to help save those who had taken in more water than they could handle. He tilted her head back, opening her lips slightly before placing his over hers. He breathed strongly into her mouth waited a few seconds and started once more. He continued breathing for her, forcing her lungs to expand and contract, until she started coughing. 

She threw up water and coughed loud and long from the stinging feel of it. 

"What do you think you are doing?" She croaked as she forced herself to a sitting position. 

"Uh, I believe that would be called saving your life. Of course, you wouldn't need saving if you had just done what I told you to do last year."

she narrowed her eyes at him.

"I don't need your help or anyone else's." 

Yami only cocked an eyebrow at her before shaking his head. He could feel the coldness of the water seeping deep into his bones as she glared at him. He crossed his arms over his chest in an effort to warm himself up, but also to try to seem imposing. His intimidation tactics had never worked on her for some reason. She only narrowed her gaze further. He groaned under the weight of it before he looked away and succumbed to the chill in his skin. He rubbed his hands over his arms, feeling goose pimples rising beneath them. His teeth began to chatter and when he glanced at her again, he noted how the blue tint to her lips had not subsided. Underneath her glare, he could see the quivering of her lips as her jaw shook from the cold penetrating deep into her core as her soaked clothes clung to her skin. 

She looked away from him, a bright red blush rising to her cheeks and highlighting the contrast with her cold lips. She pushed the blond braid she often wore back from where it had gotten plastered to her face.

"But thank you, Yami." Her voice was soft, holding no trace of the anger she had displayed so recently. "Again," she added bitterly. 

Yami sighed as he pushed himself up from his knees in one smooth move well-practiced from childhood. He looked up at what he could see of the sky through the heavily canopied forest which hung over the quiet section of the river where he had pulled them ashore. Julius had noted a few days earlier how the weather was changing rapidly and how winter was likely to come early this year. Seeing the sky now, a hazy gray mass pregnant with the promise of rainfall and possibly more, Yami was inclined to believe him. A low rumble of thunder echoed through the sky. Yami ran his hands through his hair before offering one to Charlotte. 

"Come on. We need to find some shelter."

"But protocol says we should stay put if we're ever lost so we will be easier for a search party to find." She put her hand in his and leveraged herself up.

"If we don't get warm soon, though, all a search party will find is a couple of corpses." He tried to pull her along as he turned toward the wood. "Besides, it's going to rain."

She firmly stood her ground but did not let go of his hand. The force of her anchoring him made him stop.

"A little rain never hurt anyone." Her voice was breathy, chattery as her entire body shivered. Yami gave her an incredulous look.

"Perhaps not, but it's already too cold out here for the time of year. If we don't get warm and dry, we will die. So come on." He gave his arm one hard tug and she lurched forward a step or two. She dropped his hand, but she continued to follow him. He didn't look back to see, but he could tell she was with him by the constant chattering of her teeth and soft mumblings of frustration as she argued with herself. He didn't necessarily care what she was saying, but in the quiet of the forest covered hills, her voice seemed to echo though he was certain she thought she was being quiet. She said things about him, things he was used to hearing, words he had been called since he had come to this place since he had joined the magic knights at Julius' bequest. But there were other things too, frustration and loneliness, a longing more heard in the tone of her voice than in her words. 

And there was the cold. She constantly muttered about the cold. He could almost hear her shiver. Truth be told, he couldn't stop shivering himself. The robe he wore was now a millstone around his neck. The weight of it pressing into his shoulders and against his throat was choking. And it dripped with water. He tried to ring out what he could as they walked, but it was never enough. He looked down at his shaking fingers and saw how the base of his nails had turned purple. 

A loud crack of thunder sounded above them. he could hear Charlotte gasp in sudden shock at the noise as a light, cold rain fell through the trees in heavy droplets. He stopped and looked around. Charlotte, not paying much attention, nearly collided with him. Where her metal bracer brushed his skin, he felt a line of cold, as if he had been struck by ice magic. 

"We can't keep walking along the river. We need to find a cave or something to get out of the rain." He looked at her as an idea popped into his head. "Your briars..."

"What about them?" He could barely make out the words through the chattering of her teeth. He turned to her in worry. She rubbed her eyes like she was tired.

"You have a defensive spell, right?"

"What?" She seemed confused, but eventually, she processed the question. "Oh right, of course, I do. Why?"

"Can you use it to build a shelter? Something we could start a fire under?"

"I..." He could see her thinking, calculating as she furrowed her brow. "I'm not sure. I've never done something like that before." Her voice was unsteady, uncertain, even over the chattering of her teeth.

"You need to try." Yami placed his hands on her shoulders. The blue in her lips was back fully as her jaw wavered uncontrollably. But the sparkling blue in her eyes froze him for a moment as it always did. He felt trapped in her gaze briefly as she looked up at him uncertainly. He took her hands in both of his, as the rain began to fall with greater frequency, the cold droplets pelting them like tiny razors. HIs worry about her survival only grew with the frequency of the raindrops hitting them. "Charlotte, you can do this, but you need to do it now." He didn't want to scare her, but he needed her to succeed or they would likely both die from the exposure to the cold.

She nodded as he squeezed her hands before she summoned her grimoire. He went to work clearing space for a makeshift shelter. If for some reason she failed, he thought, we should have a plan B. He looked around at the vegetation, wondering if he could use it to lash together a makeshift lean-to if she failed. He collected what he could for a fire before it got completely soaked as she made a tendril of vines burst through the floor. Her grimoire cast a faint blue glow to the area supplementing the dying light of the sun and illuminating the sickly pallor of her face. Slowly, through fits and starts, she arched the tendrils upward and over until they met above them. As he watched, he could see the exhaustion on Charlotte's face and the trembling in her hands. He took her hands in his and felt them go still for a moment. When she looked at him once more, she seemed calmer, more focused. 

"You're doing great." The words felt awkward in his mouth, as they were strung together in an unfamiliar fashion. He had never told anyone he was proud of them before. But she deserved it and he could see she needed the encouragement. Before long, a thicket for thorns arched up and over them, surrounding them and shielding them from the rain which now fell in sheets. Charlotte collapsed to the floor, landing hard on her rear. Yami piled together the kindling he had collected, hoping against hope that it wasn't too wet already and pulled out his lighter to start a fire. However, as he tried to ignite the lighter, it would not work. 

"Must have gotten damaged in the fall," he muttered as he tucked it back into the pouch on the belt he hadn't left behind. He felt around for some rocks he noticed earlier, hoping they were the right kind to make a bit of a spark. He glanced over to where Charlotte had propped herself against the wall of the thicket she had built. 

"Charlotte?" He hadn't meant for it to sound panicked, but he could barely keep his own jaw from shaking from the cold. 

"Hmm?" Her voice was sleepy and distant. He sighed as he struck the two rocks he had found together.

"I promise I'm not trying to be creepy, but you need to take your armor off." He struck the rocks together once, twice, with not a single spark between them.  Charlotte did not answer, nor did he hear any movement from where she sat indicating she was taking off the armor which had almost spelled the death of her. He struck the stone again and whooped as he saw a tiny spark flash with the action. 

"Hmm?" Her tired voice sounded again. 

"Take off your armor." He struck the rocks again and was rewarded with more sparks which now fell into the kindling he had collected and quickly died away. "Shit." He tried again and again, but between his hands shaking from the cold and the dampness of the kindling, he had little success. 

And Charlotte still made no move to remove the metal plates on her body. 

Finally, he struck the rocks together once again, and this time the spark caught. He breathed a sigh of relief as the flames sprung to life on the small bit of moss and then on the twigs and sticks he had assembled. Once the fire was stable, he looked over at Charlotte who sat slumped against the wall. Her eyes closed, her head lolled to one side. She seemed perfectly still like she was sleeping. But Yami could feel the panic building in his being as he moved to her. He unfastened the heavy, still wet cloak from his throat and let it land in a heap on the ground as he rushed to her side.

"Charlotte? Charlotte." He tapped her cheek to rouse her. Her eyelids fluttered slightly before closing once more. Her skin was cool to the touch, fare cooler than it should have been. "Dammit." Yami cursed as he started stripping her of the metal layer she had recently taken to wearing. He had seen her a couple of months prior at a service recognition event--they had both been granted promotions, but he had barely recognized her in her shiny new armored shell. He had no idea why she had started wearing it. From what he could tell, the armor did little to actually protect her from harm as its design barely covered her vital organs. He wondered if she thought it looked cool, or if she had another reason to wear it.

Beneath the armor plating, water had pooled as well as soaked through her clothes to her skin. He tapped at her cheek again, trying to wake her.

"Come on, Sleeping Beauty. It's not nap time yet." He looked at her fingers and saw her nails were as purple as his. Her breath came shallowly, but she was still breathing. He groaned as he maneuvered her to a better sitting position. "She's going to kill me." He muttered as he tugged her shirt over her head, where he was met with yet another layer of gear. "Oh come on." he cried in frustration as he began to unfasten the corset lacing. "How does she even fight in this thing?" 

She had one final layer beneath the corset--a thin white chemise made nearly transparent by the water and which left nothing to the imagination. Despite having seen her naked before, despite his experience (not extensive, but by no means non-existent) with other women, Yami felt his cheeks redden and grow hot. If ever there was an instant cure for hypothermia, he thought, it was the sight of her firm breasts through the thin fabric. Part of him wanted to rip the garment off over her head, other parts knew now was not the time and that he was likely a dead man already for going this far without her permission. That is if she survived. 

"Fuck it." He pulled the thin fabric over her head exposing her alabaster skin. He leaned her frigid body against his as he reached around and tried to loosen her hair to dry before he went to work on removing her pants. "Of all the times to not have any sort of useful magic," he muttered to himself as he lay her on the packed earth floor near the fire. He pulled her heavy boots off, dumping water out of them as they came free of her feet. They landed with a thud against the wall of briars. Yami thought he heard cracking and stared for a moment at where the boots had hit. He unfastened the belt at her waist, pulling loose the satchel where she carried her grimoire. The book was still intact, so he knew she was still alive, but even so close to the fire, her skin was still too cool to the touch. He pulled her pants off, his hands sliding down her hips and thighs, bringing his mind back to the night a year prior when he had last touched her. Seeing her arrayed beneath him, her breasts firm and exposed, her nipples dark and hard, her hair like a golden halo surrounding her made him ache to touch her again. He wanted her. He knew it would be easy to take her, to slip inside her and do what he pleased with her body while her mind was sleeping. A dark part within him whispered to him to do it, to please himself. His erection was already straining to be free, and she was so accessible...

"Of all the times to not have a blanket..." he groaned as he pushed himself away from her and spread out his cloak to dry. He dare not use it or her cloak to cover her, to warm her as they were both still soaking wet. He pulled his own boots off, dumping the water near the edge of the shelter she had made. He tried to look away from her, but every fiber in his being was calling for her. He stripped out of his own wet clothes and spread both his and hers out as much as he could in an effort to dry them as quickly as possible. He could feel his own shivering slow the more he worked and the more the fire warmed the small area. But still, Charlotte did not respond. His task done, he squatted next to her, ignoring his desire as he looked her over. Slowly her coloring seemed to return to normal and her breathing deepened as her body warmed. He brushed his fingers along her belly, he told himself to see if she was warming up. She no longer felt cold to the touch, but now he wanted her even more. She had not changed in the year since she had given herself to him for his birthday gift. Not physically anyway. 

He wondered if she regretted what had happened that night, or if she perhaps thought of him more often than she should. He hated to admit it, but he thought of her far more frequently than he ought. Thoughts of her would spawn randomly in his mind--memories of their single night together, imaginings of what it would be like to have her again, to give himself over to her. And always at the most obscure and usually the most inconvenient of moments, like during a mission briefing. He had found himself thinking of her more and more, especially when he was out on the town. Every woman he picked up he compared to her, which was ridiculous because she wasn't much different from them.

Except that she was. To him anyway, and he couldn't figure out why.

And now, she lay naked and unconscious in front of him. Where she any other woman, he might try something, he thought, before rejecting the idea outright. No, he realized, he wouldn't want to do anything to any other woman. He wanted her. 

He groaned as he sat back on his rear and crossed his legs in front of him. He watched her as her breathing steadied further until she shifted positions. When she curled herself onto her side, her back to him, he released a long breath. He shifted to his knees and leaned over her, looking at her face in profile as he brushed her hair away from her mouth before he stood and added more fuel to the fire. 

He felt drained as he sat back down. He wasn't afraid anymore, he was certain they would both live now, but he was physically exhausted from the exertion and now he felt emotionally worn out from the worry. And now that she had moved on her own, even if she hadn't awoken, all of the tension he had been holding fled from him, along with the rest of his energy. He stretched his body out next to her, parallel but a short distance away and could feel sleep straining to take over. But as he lay there exhausted, thoughts of her danced once more through his mind. He closed his eyes and allowed his imagination to run wild while knowing anything he could imagine would be incredibly far from any sort of truth he might experience with her. He stroked himself, falling into a rhythm both comfortable and pleasing as his memory presented him with an amalgamation of images of her: straddling him with her sheer chemise barely hiding her breasts, her bottom lip between her teeth as she engulfed him, her body rocking against him, her breasts shimmying  with each movement, her face diving close to his, kissing his lips, the tip of his nose, his forehead before brushing her breasts over him. 

He could feel the pressure building, demanding its release.

"Yami?" Her voice cut through his mind like a blade. He opened his eyes, his hand still on his throbbing, waiting cock, and turned to her. Her back was still to him. 

"Yami, I'm cold."

He swallowed hard. Her voice was filled with a promise he had not expected, not again, or maybe he was imagining it? He wasn't sure. She seemed to be inviting him to do, well, something with her, even if it was only holding her. But he wanted so much more than that. He still ached with desire, with the unmet need for release. He wanted her against his body, her straddling him, beneath him, he didn't really care how or where he just wanted her. 

"Everything's wet, Charlotte." He wondered if she was wet too. Last time, she had been so wet when he entered her, so desperate for someone, anyone to have her. Now he was slick with his own desperation. "It's not like we planned this little foray into the woods, you know." He stroked himself slowly, trying to find the rhythm he had lost as his body and mind cried out, demanded satisfaction. He was certain she had heard his need when he spoke. He certainly had. She rolled onto her back and looked at him then. He watched as her eyes flicked down to his engorged cock. He wasn't certain if she knew she had licked her lips or not, but he could barely see her face, much less read what lay unspoken in her eyes because of the shadows cast on her by the flames in their dance behind her. 

"There are other ways to get warm, aren't there?" She sounded innocent to his ears, but the way she reached out to him, the way she stroked his arm with her fingertips as she rolled onto her side and kicked her knee over his, made him keenly aware of how innocent she was. He closed his eyes as she pillowed her head on his shoulder, her breasts pressing into his arm. He groaned slightly as she ran her hand across his chest and down, further down until she brushed her fingers against the tip of his erection. He twisted the hand she had pinned against his side around slightly. With the movement, he could hear her gasp as he probed the soft curls of hair covering her and then deeper until he made her suck in a sharp breath. She was not as wet as he had hoped, but he would make it work. He pushed her back onto her back and used his knees to push her legs apart. He wedged himself between her legs before he leaned forward and flicked his tongue over her nipples. He found her lips eager for his once he reached them. Her body arched to meet his as his tongue explored the depths of her mouth. 

"I want you." He admitted, his voice husky, as he spoke between kisses. He was answered by her legs wrapping around him and pulling him closer. He pushed himself into her and relished the feel of her tight grip around him, pulling him in deeper. Her hands slipped up his arms and around his neck, holding him in a deep long kiss--the best kind of kiss, a kiss like no other he had experienced from any other woman. He wanted to stay on the edge where he was, balanced between his release and his need to see her at her most beautiful, most vulnerable. She made the decision for him as he held himself still within her when she started to slowly gyrate her hips, moving him around inside her. He knew he was touching every part of her, both inside and out, that would bring her to climax. He could see it in her face. Admittedly, the movement felt pretty damn good to him as well. 

Slowly he built up to a new rhythm--a joint rhythm, one shared only with her, as they writhed in unison. Slowly, eventually, their movements brought them to a fever pitch as he felt the release finally get pushed over the edge and he filled her to overflowing with his semen. Her walls tightened around him, in response drawing out more than he thought possible. 

She wrapped her hand around the back of his neck once more, smiling at him in the dying light of the fire, before she pulled his lips to hers and kissed him gently. 

"We should, uh, we should get dressed," he mumbled, as he struggled to break free of her touch. He only wanted to lay down with her and rest, to have her stroke his head as she did just then, brushing his hair back from his face. He knew they should at least check to see if their clothes were dry, and his habit of leaving once he had finished tried to kick in, but her touch stopped him in his tracks.

"There's no rush." her voice was soft and deep, warming and soothing, like a cup of soup in the winter. "Besides, everything's still soaked, right?"

He lay his head on her shoulder, nodding, and passed out, still relishing the warmth of her body surrounding him. 

*

Yami woke from the cold. As he opened his eyes, the darkness seemed to hang in the air. It took him a moment to realize that the fire had gone out, longer than it had taken him to realize she was no longer nestled into his side. He pulled himself up to his elbows and looked around, but the movement did little to clear his vision. The night was pitch black, or he imagined it would be if he could see beyond the vine barrier Charlotte had built to protect them. He thought he saw her looking out through the small opening in the shelter. As his eyes slowly adjusted to the faint moonlight filtering through the tiniest openings in the vines, Yami noticed the roses on the vines where he was sure they had not been before. The flowers were small and fragrant, filling the air with their heady scent. 

"Charlotte?" His voice croaked as he called for her. The opening in the small hut suddenly bloomed with light as she knelt next to him. 

"Awake now, sleepy-head?" 

She had dressed, at least in most of her gear. She had wisely left the armor shell and her boots off. Yami yawned and nodded. As he looked up at her, he felt the urge to kiss her again. Truthfully, he felt the urge for more. He could feel his body leaping at the thought of having her against him once more. From the slight turn of her head, he was sure she had seen as well. He did nothing to hide his nakedness, not from her. 

"Yeah." He rubbed his eyes, trying to somehow bring more clarity to his vision, but the darkness stymied him. She pressed a small bottle into his hands. It was cool to the touch, and the shape of it was familiar. He pulled the stopper off of the small bottle and brought it to his lips, quenching his thirst. "Thanks."

"You should get dressed. I tried to keep the fire going, but it went out while I was looking for more wood." 

Yami sat up. He wanted to say something about what happened, but he didn't quite know how to broach the subject. Charlotte yammered on, nervously he thought, about what she had done upon waking, about her work to build a beacon of sorts for any search parties looking for them. He pulled on his pants and then his shirt before belting everything together. He did not bother with his robe yet. He stood a best he could in the small shelter, but could not quite straighten up fully. 

"Well, at least the rain's stopped." He poked his head out of the opening. "But everything out there is still soaked, I bet." Yami sighed as he stepped fully out of the shelter and stretched. He could feel her furtive glances and felt once more the need to say something.

"Do you think they've started looking for us?" She asked from the other side of the hut. She sat on the ground with her knees tucked into her chest, clearly illuminated by the moonlight behind him. She stared absently at the spot where the fire had been, only every so often lifting her eyes to him. Or at least he thought she was looking at him. In the dim light, he found it difficult to tell. Yami ducked into the small structure once more. He felt around for the rocks he had used earlier to start the fire, hoping he could get something lit once more. 

"I dunno. I doubt they could have gotten far with the rain even if they had gotten started." He struck the rocks together, checking to see if they sparked. The first pair he picked up clunked as he cracked them together, but there was no flash of light he could use to start a fire. He picked up a second pair and tried again to no avail. He grunted.

"Why are you even trying?" Her voice was filled with a different sort of desperation. "It's not like we have any fuel for a fire."

He picked up another rock and tried again. This time he was rewarded with the spark he sought. 

"Because giving up is the first type of defeat. Giving up means you'll always be stuck in the same place, never pushing your limits." He pulled his now dry cloak toward him. The velvet and silk monstrosity should make good kindling, he thought as he ripped off a bit of the length from the bottom. He crawled to the entrance where she had piled up a small collection of twigs. They were all wet, but he hoped they wouldn't produce too much smoke as they burned. 

"Days like this, I wish I had fire magic." He muttered as he stacked the twigs and laid a scrap of fabric on one wider piece of wood. "Just..." He snapped his fingers. "And bam. Fire."

"Neither of our magics are terribly useful in this sort of situation," Charlotte said from her spot on the wall.

"Don't sell yourself short, Charlotte. If you hadn't built this shelter, we would have had to find something and might have died before we did." Yami struck the rocks together several times, hoping a spark would catch.

"I guess that's two I owe you now."

Small embers began to glow in the fabric, which Yami nursed carefully into a small flame.

"Two?" He placed the small blossom of fire into the pile of sticks and prayed.

"Two times for saving my life?" Charlotte reminded him. Yami looked at the fire for a moment. He chewed his lip, wishing he had a cigarette, but all of them had gotten soaked in the fall and the delicate paper surrounding the tobacco had disintegrated until he was left with nothing but a pouch full of leaves. He thought about tossing a bit into the fire, wondering if just the smell of it would help.

"You don't owe me anything, Charlotte." He couldn't bring himself to look at her. He wanted to, desperately. He wanted to see the small dancing flames reflected in her crystalline eyes. But if he looked, he knew, looking would turn to more, and he had the feeling she wasn't into more at the moment.

"I hate feeling like I'm indebted to you." Her voice was soft, ashamed, with none of the passion he had heard in it before. He could not help but look at her and he immediately knew it was a mistake. He had told her before that their sleeping together didn't have to mean anything. He had never felt more than a physical release with anyone else, so he thought it would be the same with her. 

But that was when it was just one time.

After a second, he found the idea a little harder to justify. He panicked.

"As far as I'm concerned, any debt has been paid in full." He quipped. "After all, not many men can say they've had the pleasure of kissing the Blue Rose's Thorn Maiden." 

Her lips pressed together in a tight line and her eyes narrowed as she crossed her arms over her chest. The mask she always wore slipped easily back into place.

Stupid, he thought as she closed herself off once more. He ripped the bottom of his squad robe into long strips and slowly fed them to the growing fire. The fabric caught quickly and the flames crept up the twigs as Yami stared at the fire. He took a deep breath, wishing once more for a cigarette to help him pass the time in what was sure to be a long rest of the night. 

*

Charlotte stood up angrily as Yami tended the new fire and stepped out the opening of the small hut. She shook her head and bit her lip as she looked to the sky. The clouds had cleared and the stars twinkled, though they were dimmed by the brightness of the full moon. 

How can he be so clueless? She kicked a rock into the distance and winced at the small stab of pain in her toes. 

How can I be so stupid? She channeled her frustration into the growth of a briar tower. The spell was not very difficult or different from her defensive wall, and she had managed to adapt that spell to build the structure they had used to seek refuge from the rain. A slight adjustment once more, and Charlotte felt she could produce a fairly effective beacon. 

Frankly, she thought, the faster she got away from him, the better she would feel. 

As she watched the vines intertwine and reach for the sky into a tall spire breaking the tree top, she tried to force herself to think as he did. She knew she would never be promiscuous, not as he was, but neither did she have to wallow in self-pity over some guy who would never be hers, not really. 

"Not that I even want him like that," she muttered to herself as the buds on the spire slowly opened into light blue roses. She sagged as energy fled from her body. She realized how weak she still was, despite everything, or maybe because of it. She knew she should go back inside, but she wasn't quite ready to face him. Though the night was now clear, it was also frigid, and Charlotte could feel herself start to shiver. She closed her eyes and steeled herself with a deep breath before ducking back into the small hut. 

Yami didn't even look at her as she entered, and she was fine with not seeing his deep brown eyes, so dark like the depth of a lake in which she could simply drown.  She chided herself for the thought of his eyes, but once she started thinking, she could not stop. From his eyes, her mind called forth his smile--a rare sight indeed. And then his voice flowed through her mind like a deep warm baritone current, and she knew then as surely as he had broken the curse. She loved him, and nothing she could do, nothing he could say would change that. As she sat against the wall of the shelter, she felt tears welling in her eyes. She bit her lip to keep it from trembling, or from giving away her feelings. She pulled her knees to her chest and pressed her forehead into the arm she laid over their top. 

For the first time since he had broken the curse, she was crushed by her regret at giving in to her feelings.  She could not stop the tears as they fell. Her friend had told her before that sometimes we needed tears, and Charlotte felt like she needed them then. If he knew she was crying, he hadn't shown it, and for that Charlotte was grateful. As the tears fell, Charlotte bid her regret, her love to fall with them. She prayed she might be able to look at him and see just another magic knight, a comrade, someone to fight beside instead of his smile as he looked up at her, or the desire in his eyes before he crushed his lips into hers. She looked up, propping her chin against her arm as he stood and walked out of the small space. As he stood just outside the doorway in a mixture of moonlight and flame, her heart clenched with longing. 

And she realized she hadn't meant what she said about indebtedness. She didn't feel like she owed him anything. She wanted him though. She wanted to feel his arms around her whenever she was scared, or sad, or angry. And the thought made her hate herself. For so long she had tried to be strong, to stand on her own two feet, to move under her own power and by her own whims. She never thought those whims could include someone else. When she had admitted to her captain what had happened with the curse and how it had been broken, she had been rebuked and told to not let her fancies get in the way of her work. For the last year, she had been able to ignore thoughts of him. Out of sight, out of mind, she had been told. She had heard once or twice of him working with some of her squad mates, and of the conquests, he had made among them. She had tried to take to heart what he had said after that first time, that it didn't have to mean anything. She was certain he felt nothing more for her, not after getting word of his actions with others. 

But as much as she tried, she couldn't let him go. 

And now, looking at him from across the small room and through the narrow opening, she grew ever more frustrated with the jumble of emotions she had become. She wiped her face angrily as he stepped back into the shelter.

"That's an impressive tower." He sat down at the fire across from her, his back to the door. He had a large stick at his side as if he were ill at ease without his sword. He drummed his fingers against the stick as he chewed on the thumbnail on his other hand. His eyes darted around as if he could not sit completely still. 

"Thanks." Her voice sounded far less confident than she had intended. She watched him fidget. He always seemed so cool and collected, smooth like water on the battlefield, and like he had no care in the world otherwise. 

"And, uh, thanks for earlier, Charlotte." The drumming and darting eyes continued, though his gaze was cast mostly to the ground. "You didn't have to." He coughed, doubling over as the fit shook his body.

"I didn't do it because I had to." She laid her cheek against her arms, curling herself further into a ball. She could feel him look at her then, but she could not return the glance. "I don't do things like that because I have to, Yami." 

"So, was it another 'Thank You'?"

She looked over at him, but he was staring into the dancing flames. Was it her way of saying thank you for rescuing her... again? She wiped hot tears from her cheeks, anger welling up once more over her inability to save herself, over her need to have him play the hero. She hadn't thought it her way of showing gratitude when she had asked him over, she had simply wanted him. 

"I guess?" 

Yami coughed again before he could respond. Charlotte knit her eyebrows together as she watched him across the fire. She had never seen him even remotely ill before, not that she had much experience with him on a daily basis. He rummaged through a pouch on his belt, only to groan in frustration.

"Are you alright?" She asked, growing concerned. He waved at her, she guessed in an attempt to reassure her, but his face was flushed red as the coughing fit continued.

"I need a  fucking cigarette." He croaked between coughs. She scooted her way around the fire until she was next to him. She pressed the bottle into his hands once more and bade him to drink from it. She was grateful the enchanted item had not been broken in the fall as they would both be struggling from dehydration in addition to hunger as the growling of her stomach reminded her. Though Yami seemed to be suffering from something else, she thought.

Yami sighed as he drained the bottle and the coughing subsided, but Charlotte noticed his jitteriness now that she was up close. Even sitting still, he seemed to vibrate.

"When we get through this and get back to civilization, I'm getting a waterproof case for the damn things."

"Maybe you should stop using them if they get you like this."

He chuckled and shook his head. 

"Not having them gets me like this."

"You seemed fine earlier." She watched his profile, his jaw clenching and relaxing, the muscles in his neck rippling as he swallowed. She wanted to touch him, to run her fingers along the cords of muscle in his throat, the sharpness of his jaw. She wanted to bite him where his neck sloped into his shoulder. She bit her lip and kept her hands to herself. 

"I was distracted earlier." He looked at her with red-rimmed, bloodshot eyes, but something in them told her what he had meant. He had been distracted by her touch, her kiss, more than the immediate need to save her life. His eyes burned in the firelight, like coals in a furnace. She wanted him to kiss her, but she would not stoop to acting on her own desire. She would have been perfectly happy to 'thank' him for his actions once more if he had made the move. But he turned back to the fire. His eyelids smothered the passion she had seen. 

She pulled her knees to her chest once more, yawning and trying to ignore the emptiness in her belly. She could hear his stomach growl too, but he only stared into the fire, his fingers drumming incessantly on the stick he had placed next to him. He poked his head out of the doorway and looked up to the sky. He sat back disgusted or frustrated. 

"I can't tell the time through the trees." He rubbed his hand over his face. "Too much cover." He shivered. Charlotte tried to ignore the presence of him next to her as he rubbed his palms over his chest. "And why the fuck does the weather have to be so stupid? It's freezing out there, in fucking September. I'm surprised it didn't snow earlier with as fucked up as the weather has been." He continued to try to warm himself, but Charlotte could still see the goosebumps making the hair on his arms stand on end. 

She stood up and walked over to where her squad robe had been toss aside earlier. She sighed a silent prayer of thanks to whatever being might be watching over them when she felt its dryness. She, too, was feeling the cold in the air seeping into their little shelter. She hoped dawn would come soon. If what he had said was right, daybreak would likely be the first chance a rescue party might have to find them. She had sent up the tower to help out should they search by air, but in the dark, it would be little help. She had half a mind to wrap the robe around her shoulders as she returned to the spot next to him by the fire, but the thought was fleeting. She had far more clothing than he did, at least at the moment. She stopped in front of him and leaned over as she draped the fabric over his back and around his arms. 

"It's not much, but it's bound to be better than nothing." She squatted in front of him, the fire making her backside burn with the closeness of it. She looked him in the eye, almost daring him to do anything, hoping he would act. He pulled the robe more tightly around him as he looked at her, but she only saw his lips pursing slightly.

"I was fine." He protested, pulling the robe as tightly as he could. "But thanks." He looked at the ground between them. 

Charlotte pressed her lips together in a thin line, frustrated with his lack of action, frustrated with herself as well with her own refusal to act. She sat back down next to him, pulling her knees to her chest once more. 

"You don't have to lie to me, you know." 

"What made you think I was lying?"

She let out an exasperated breath before turning her head to look at him. His brows were furrowed in confusion. She turned her body to kneel before him, placing her hands on her knees. 

"Last year or so you told me something which struck me in such a fundamental way it changed, well, it changed a lot."

"And you could still work on following that advice." 

Charlotte gripped her knees and narrowed her eyes. She closed them as she took a deep breath. She could not believe she had been attracted to him, or that she allowed him to... She shook the thought away. Yami Sukehiro needed a bit of his own advice, she thought. 

"Perhaps, but that is for me to work on. And you... You need to learn to follow your own advice." 

He sat up straighter.

"You have people who care about you, Yami, who worry about you. And you go and do stupid things, or put on airs. You try to be the hero, even when you don't need to be."

"I've never tried to be the hero." He protested, but his voice was a whisper and he stared at her wide-eyed. 

"Oh, you haven't? Then how do you explain this?" Her gesture encompassed everything. She hoped she was being clear, but she felt like her point had gone a bit off the rails. His surprise had turned to anger and he turned to face her fully. She knew if he tried anything physical, he would subdue her quickly. She wasn't even sure her magic would be a fair match for him if he decided to hurt her. She stared at him defiantly.

"So I guess you wanted to die? Because if I hadn't gone in after you, that is what would have happened."

She tilted her head. 

"Are you sure? You were with your captain. He's a time mage." She pointed out. "You don't think he could have rewound things a few seconds? But you didn't think, did you? You just acted."

He lunged toward her, a flurry of blue fabric as he moved and her robe fluttered to the ground.  He stopped himself as his face blanched with the reality of what she was saying. He sat back on his heels and took a deep breath. Charlotte had recoiled automatically, bracing herself for an attack that never came. She only slowly relaxed as he pulled her robe back onto his shoulders. 

Dammit, I need a fucking cigarette." He looked into the fire once more. "Sorry. I told you before that I would never hurt you." He looked at her again, catching the fury in her eyes. "I meant what I said. I just, my head's all messed up right now."

"We're both hungry and angry. And tired." She yawned. 

"And cold." He added. 

"And my head is killing me."

"Mine too, but I didn't crack mine open on a rock." He reached out and ran his fingers through her hair. She started to recoil from the touch, still angry, but the action was more clinical than intimate. She winced as he touched a tender spot near her ear. "You feeling alright? I mean, aside from hungry and angry."

"Fine. A little dizzy."

"Hopefully they find us quickly in the morning." He peeked out the opening again and came back frowning, frustrated, she guessed, with the canopy blocking his sight of the moon and stars. 

He yawned as he laid his head against the wall.

"Get some rest." She suggested. He shook his head. 

"You're injured, can't expect you to keep watch."

"You didn't seem too concerned with that earlier. Besides, I have my grimoire and you don't, so perhaps I am better suited to keep watch than  you are at this particular moment." She patted her knee. "Come on, Yami. I'll protect you from any scary monsters."

He looked at her for a moment. 

"We both need rest." He reached for his robe and pulled another few strips of cloth from it before feeding them to the fire. He took the large stick he had found and broke it into smaller chunks before adding them to the fire as well. 

***

Everything she had said hit him hard. He didn't want to admit it, but she might be right. Not that he could really tell what was going on in because his mind only screamed for a cigarette. He had watched himself react to her earlier, feeling a shiver of terror as he had moved to hurt her. But his rational mind was not in control, and he struggled to rein the anger back in. He barely succeeded. He could feel the rage and frustration bubbling beneath his thin layer of control. He tightened the robe she had placed around his shoulders. He cursed himself for not accepting it gratefully. 

She had told him to rest, had offered him comfort in a way his body and mind needed. But he could not leave her awake and alone, and he could not trust himself. Not now. Not like this. Not when he was dangling on the precipice of reason between anger and desire. And he did want her, even now, when her eyes had flashed with anger and her voice was filled with contempt. She didn't have to try with him, though given what he had overheard, she wouldn't have had to try with any other man either. She would have just had to give them the time of day and so many would have given themselves to her--be it for her beauty or her status. 

But he didn't care about any of that. She was beautiful, sure, and he saw that beauty with every movement, in her strength, her tears, her anger and her confidence. He would be lying if he didn't find that beauty attractive. But there was something else, some vulnerability he had glimpsed, something which drove him to want to protect her. It was this... thing which pushed him to go after her, to take it as his job to keep her safe.

"We both need rest." He said as he stoked the fire. He knew she was going to argue. He scooted next to her.

"Lay down, Yami." She insisted, patting her knee once more. She stretched out her legs, her stocking feet with wiggling toes near the fire. "I'll rest too, I promise."

He wanted to hold her, to cuddle her close against his body like before. She stared at him with her big blue eyes until he nodded. He lay his head on her thigh and could hear her breath quicken. She covered him with her robe, ensuring that it was pulled tightly around him. He sighed as her long slender fingers stroke through his hair. He tried to watch the fire, but the gentle brushing fo her fingers along his skull quickly lulled him to sleep.

He woke to the sounds of people shouting outside the hut. They had been found. His head was still nestled in Charlotte's lap, but her hand had fallen slack as she too had drifted to sleep. He lay there a moment wishing she was still stroking his head. Something about the action had felt so soothing. He had forgotten about his hunger and the screaming demands for a cigarette for a moment, well, long enough to drift off to sleep.

She shifted beneath him, placing her hand on his head again, her fingers slipping through his hair.

"Happy Birthday, Yami." She said softly as her fingers slid along his scalp before coming to rest on his shoulder. He was surprised she had remembered, with all that had happened.

The voices grew closer; he could make out the relief in the searchers' voices. He sat up and looked at her. The mask she usually wore was in place, hiding the passion and rage she had shown him earlier. Her blue eyes were cold instead of the icy fire he knew they could hold. Her thick lips, which his still sleepy mind longed to kiss, were pressed into a thin line. 

He took the chance anyway. For a brief moment, he pressed his lips against hers, cupping her cheeks in his hands. He hovered, pressing his forehead against hers for a moment, waiting for her to do or say something--a slap, a kiss, anything. He expected the slap. He didn't expect her answer to be nothing. 

Slowly he dropped his hands as he could feel the search party encroaching on their little space. He sat back on his heels and met her eyes. They were still cold, aloof, distant. But he thought he saw for a moment, just a flicker of the fire he knew could be there. 

"Yami Sukehiro? Charlotte Roselei? Are you both there? Do either of you need medical attention?" A voice came clear from outside the hut.

Charlotte stood, picked up her robe from the ground, and pushed past him to the door.

"Happy Birthday, Charlotte." He said as she passed. She stopped and looked at him a moment. "Early, anyway." 

"Thank you, for everything." She ducked out of the small hut and called out to the rescuers. As Yami stood and retrieved his now tattered squad robe, the hut disintegrated around him. He met her stern eyes once more through the dissipating magic, evaporating in the morning light as quickly as their desire. Julius' voice calling him made him turn and break the spell. The older man who had been so like a brother or father to him in the years since he had arrived embraced him and Yami could feel the worry leaving the older man's body. 

"Don't ever scare me like that again." Julius shoved Yami's belt into his hands. As Yami fastened the leather strapping around his waist, he caught Julius looking over his shoulder. When he turned, he saw Charlotte was in the path of Julius' gaze. Yami felt a twinge of anger and anxiety as the older man looked at the woman who had captured his fancy--he couldn't deny anymore that he liked her, physically. But Julius' gaze was narrow, not moony-eyed as Yami worried his own glance had become. Julius seemed more to be calculating something than looking longingly at a would-be lover.

"Anything interesting happen?" Julius placed his hands on his hips as he watched the Blue Rose captain look over Charlotte.

"What do you mean?" Yami brought his hand to his mouth before realizing he didn't have a cigarette. 

"You,  you know, anything interesting. I mean, she is quite pretty." Julius waggled his eyebrows at his protege. Yami scoffed at the idea and shook his head. He couldn't allow himself to tell anyone. She would quite literally kill him, he was certain, if he did. He was fairly certain she would have some creative and painful ways to do it as well. 

"Are we done here? I need a cigarette." Yami turned and started walking down to the river bank.

"Yeah. Fine. Let's go." Julius watched the younger man's back for a moment, feeling something was different, but not being able to put his finger on what. He glanced back at Charlotte, now surrounded by a contingent of her sisters from the Blue Rose squad and back to Yami. When he glanced at Charlotte once more, he saw a flicker of... something he couldn't describe. He followed Yami down to the bank, watching the young man's back.   
Something had happened, he thought. I'll get it out of him eventually.


	3. Night Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So... it's a little more than a night...

The battle against the Diamond kingdom had been grueling and Charlotte wanted nothing but to have a decent meal, a hot bath, and a comfortable bed for the night. Unfortunately, she knew she would be denied all of those things until the Wizard King either called an end to the conflict or the King himself ordered them all to return. The good news was they were holding their ground and even pushing back against the Diamond Kingdom's forces in some areas. The bad news was they had been at the fight for nearly a week with little to show for it. 

Nearly all of the Magic Knight squads were present, the only exceptions being the Purple Orcas and the Coral Peacocks, but those squads had orders which had taken them elsewhere.   
Her stomach growled as she passed by a cooking pot before joining her Blue Rose sisters in line. Each squad had their designated areas--both in the campsite and on the battlefield, though near the edges she noticed they often overlapped. For the last several days, her squad had been positioned near the Aqua Deer squad. The campsite was a swirl of light and dark blue where the two squads met. As she waited for her turn at the pot, Charlotte glanced over at the light blue robes encroaching on the space her sisters had claimed. As she scanned the others lining up at a cooking pot of their own, Charlotte's eyes were drawn by one young knight who seemed distinctly out of place among his fellows. Yami Sukehiro held his bowl at the ready as the soldier at the pot slopped in the evening's meal.

Her first thought upon seeing him was how the aqua of the squad robe was probably the most unsuitable color for his personality. She imagined only the saccharine pink of the Coral Peacocks would suit him less. She had not seen him for a year, not in any sort of up close and personal way until this morning. Sure, he was sometimes present at events she had also been called to attend, but she had not made an effort to approach him at any of those events. 

He had not made an effort either, she reminded herself. 

Today, however, they had somehow found each other despite the chaos of the battle. Despite the onslaught, despite the madness around them. They had ended up working fighting back to back. Unspoken commands and suggestions moved them to both guard and protect each other. He had saved her again, she knew. She wished she hadn't needed him to, but she had never even seen the attack heading her direction among the flashes of lightning from the opponent she faced. 

The line moved forward and Charlotte held out her own bowl. A thick brown stew filled it and she wrinkled her nose at the smell. She looked around as she stepped out of line, searching for a place, a group with whom she wanted to share the meal. She glanced back at the border between the groups. He was sitting alone. He always seemed to be alone. Unless he was with Julius. All she could see was the back of his head, the unkempt mass silhouetted in the firelight. She glanced back to her own group, looking for her friend, only to see her already in deep discussion with some of the younger members of the squad. She had little patience for them at the moment. 

She turned toward the fire where he sat and crossed the unspoken, unmarked line separating their worlds. 

It had been a year since they had seen each other last. A year since he had last saved her. She had to see him. She had something to say.

"Happy Birthday, Yami." She looked at him for a moment as he stared, dumbfounded, up at her. From the look on his face, she wondered if he had even realized his birthday had come.

"Thanks?" He had the look of a man deep in calculation as his brow furrowed and his hand had frozen in mid-air, hovering above the bowl he held in his other hand. He might have forgotten, but she had not. She had long wondered if she would end up near him on their nearly shared birthday once again. With two years behind them of near catastrophe on the days surrounding the anniversaries of their births, Charlotte had often wondered if fate would bring them together again. Fate seemed to have done so again this year, under nearly catastrophic conditions once more.

"Mind if I join you?" She shifted her weight between her feet, hesitant to take the spot on the log next to him without permission. Even if what she wanted most was to be near him, she was anxious to presume he would want company and anxious to reveal her own feelings so blatantly. She sighed as her weight shifted to her other foot, chastising herself for caring so much about what others thought, for assuming others would care about her behavior as much as she did.

Yami regained his composure and shrugged before he turned back to his bowl. 

Guess that's as good as I'll get, she thought.

She took the seat on the log next to him. He continued to eat in silence, the only sound the scraping of his wooden spoon against the curve of his bowl. She watched out the corner of her eye as he placed the empty wooden vessel on the ground next to him. He pulled out a cigarette, lit it and took a long inhale before blowing the smoke toward the fire before them.

"Happy Birthday to you too, Charlotte." He inhaled again and slowly exhaled. "Early anyway."

Charlotte took another bite of the stew in her own wooden bowl as she looked at him. The firelight flickered against his skin making the smoke enshrouding his face glow with a strange aura. She wondered then if he had remembered, or if he had thought about the last two years himself as the day approached. 

Somehow she doubted it, not after seeing his earlier surprise. 

Still, she smiled and felt a flush of warmth on her cheeks when he had wished her a happy birthday. 

She ate her food in silence, not entirely certain what to say to him. She watched him smoke out of the corner of her eye, but she tried to keep her attention mostly on the food before her. She wanted to say something, to strike up a conversation. 

No, she reminded herself. A conversation was the last thing on her mind. She wanted him to look at her, to see her not as a comrade or a fellow soldier. She wanted him to look at her the way he had a year ago when they were bundled together against the unseasonable cold. She wanted to see the desire his eyes had held as he wrapped his body around hers in an effort to keep her alive. She wanted to feel his warmth. 

But now, he seemed distant, cold, even more so than usual. 

"So, um," The silence began to grate on her nerves. "How old are you anyway?" She asked, assuming the answer would be close to twenty-five at least, or perhaps even thirty. The crinkle in his brow returned and he tapped through each of his fingers as if he were using them to track the number of years gone by.

"Twenty-one." His answer was unexpected. "Yeah," he said nodding as he confirmed the number once more. He turned and looked at her, only to be met with her open-mouthed gape and her spoon held just out of reach of her lips. "What?"

Charlotte shook away her shock and quickly shoved the spoon into her mouth. She was certain he had seen the crimson flush on her cheeks as she chewed from the way his eyebrow quirked up slightly. 

"Nothing. I, I just thought you were older, is all." She swallowed hard trying to force down her embarrassment with her bite of stew. He took a long drag on his cigarette and blew the smoke out with a chuckle.

"Do I look that old?"

Charlotte shook her head. 

"I just, I don't know, thought you were older, more like twenty-five?" She forced down another bite of stew. She felt him looking at her, his eyes piercing her as he stubbed out the end of his cigarette and lit another. 

"You like older guys?"

Charlotte choked on the bit of potato in the thick broth and coughed a bit in response.

"Not, not especially. I mean, I guess age isn't all that important."

She watched him shrug out of the corner of her eye. 

"I don't know. I think being close in age makes it easier to have things in common. Maybe. I haven't really thought about it." He took another drag. "Maybe it's easier to connect if you're close in age?" He shrugged and flicked the ash from the end of his cigarette.

"So, um, how close is close?" She placed her now empty bowl on the ground next to her feet.

"Hm?"

"A few months? A year? Two? What do you see as being close?" She gripped the rough wood of the log with her hands as she leaned forward, her attention drawn in by the flames flickering a short distance away. Her hands wanted to shake and her face was warm with embarrassment. She had not decided if she wanted him to understand why she asked or not. 

She wasn't entirely sure she was ready to admit her reason for asking even to herself.

"I dunno. A year seems about right, I guess." He echoed her posture after tucking his cigarette back between his lips. 

Charlotte's heart raced as he hand brushed hers. The touch sent a tingling like lightning up her arm. she could not help the small gasp which escaped her lips. She glanced at him, wondering if he had heard, but his eyes were fixed on the flames before them, narrow and dark in the low light. 

***

The touch had been an accident. He hadn't meant to brush her hand. But he had. And now he did not want to draw away from her. Yami clenched his jaw and released it with a long breath as he took the cigarette out from between his lips and blew a long stream of smoke at the fire before them. 

The touch had been like a shock, like being struck by a lightning mage. No. That's not right. The touch was tingly, yes, but it was warm too. And soothing despite its unexpectedness.   
He had felt nothing like it since the last time they had been alone together. 

He stared into the flames, reluctant to pull his hand away, wondering why he felt this spreading warmth with her and no one else. Despite all his efforts to replicate the feeling, he had never met anyone who could match what the tiniest touch of her hand gave him.

He felt her stiffen next to him, but he noticed she didn't draw away either.

"A year doesn't seem too bad." 

Her voice sounded a touch more breathless than it had before and when he turned to her, curious as to why he found himself caught in her sky blue eyes. They were cold in color, but a warmth burned in them, embracing him in her gaze. He didn't want to look away. He didn't know if he could. In the end, she broke the spell on him as she turned back to the fire. 

"You like tough girls if I recall." She seemed emboldened. "Strong women."

He took another long drag on the cigarette held between two fingers on his other hand, not the one he refused to move. The movement felt awkward and unfamiliar in his non-dominant hand.

"Did I say that?" He asked, knowing very well it was true. When he had stumbled upon her and her out of control magic, he had told her as much. He did like strong women. He liked when a woman could take care of herself, and when he could rely on her to have his back as well. 

"Find any that fit the bill lately?"

Her eyes sparkled in the firelight as he looked at her profile. What is she trying to get at? She shifted her hand next to his, landing on top of his fingers. The weight of it felt nice. He glanced down at her pale narrow hand, her delicate fingers splayed over his own coarse rough digits before glancing at her face once more. She stared into the fire but he could see the subtlest of smiles on her lips and a tinge of rose on her cheeks. 

And he could only think of one answer to her question.

He had found her. 

He wanted to kiss her, to hold her against his chest, to feel her body pressed against his.

He knew what it would feel like, but he still wanted it in the same way he sometimes wanted the grilled squid he grew up with or the calm peace he sometimes felt when he was out fishing and it was just him and the ocean. He shifted his hand beneath hers, turning it until her palm fell against his. He expected her to pull away. To realize how bad an idea it would be for them to move forward with things here, in the middle of a battlefield. Julius had not given him many rules since the war had started, but one he was adamant about regarded war and love. He had said all may be fair in love and war, but the two should never mix. One should never look for love on the battlefield or in camp, he had told Yami when pressed. 

But this isn't love. This isn't a relationship. This is just... desire, need, release. A way to ease the tension. Julius had never said anything against that. 

He looked back to the fire, searching for answers in the flickering dance of the flames.

"You never answered my question."

"Does it matter? We all could be dead tomorrow."

He felt her eyes on him again. The weight of the stare begged him to look at her. She knew it was true, though she did not want to admit it. Death was a hard thing to face, despite having seen so much of it lately. He didn't want to think about it; none of them did. Yami guessed the omnipresent specter of death was the reason Julius had never taken sex in camp off of the table.

He met her eyes. And then her lips.

If he should fall with the dawn, he was going to have one last good birthday.

And one last birthday with her sounded perfect.

She met the kiss with gusto and a desire which echoed his own, one which threw caution to the wind and forgot about the world around them for a moment. 

He pulled her to standing and blindly navigated their way to the small tent he had called home the last few weeks. Her presence made using ki to move through the camp, even the short distance to the tent, difficult. He wasn't sure if it was the way she smelled or her touch or how he let himself fall into her kiss, but he knew for certain that Charlotte Roselei messed with his head in a way no other woman ever had. 

And as he kissed her, he realized he wouldn't have it any other way. 

He pulled away from her and looked around at the rows of tents surrounding him. He would have hated accidentally stumbling into the wrong spot, but somehow had managed to find his way to the place he had claimed when the campaign had started. They had not had to travel too far from the fire, but they were still neatly settled into a nondescript row of identical sleeping areas.

Satisfied he had found the right spot, he looked back to her. She chewed on her bottom lip and even in the dim twilight, he could see the flush on her cheeks. She looked down at the ground, uncertain. 

"We don't have to..."

"No, I want to." The words tumbled out of her mouth desperately as her grip on his arms tightened.

Four words. Four simple words and his mind shut down. All he knew after those four simple words was the feel of her against him, surrounding him, the taste of her lips, her skin, and the lyric sound of her gasps and moans as they took their pleasure in each other. 

And then blackness as he collapsed, exhausted, against her.

When he woke, he was curled around her. Their naked bodies fit together, her head pillowed on his outstretched arm. They nestled together, her back against his chest, and he held her tight until she shifted and turned toward him. She sought his lips in the darkness, her fingers brushing over his face and neck, before drawing him into her further.

The kiss felt like home. It comforted and soothed him. It stilled his mind while exciting his body. As she kissed him, she pushed him onto his back until she straddled him. His hands ran over her soft supple flesh. He memorized her form, his hands guiding the memory in the darkness. Her gasps and moans shattered the still quiet of the sleeping camp. He could picture her as she had been the year before--long blond hair cascading over her shoulders, clumped together in heavy wet strands from their impromptu dip in the river, her breasts jiggling with each movement of her writhing hips as she claimed him for her own. 

He couldn't see her now, not in the deep black of the night. Even the firelight had died down to where no light was casting a shadow of her form. But he could feel the movement of her breasts as they yearned for freedom from his hands. He ran his hands over her shoulders and around her neck, pulling her into another deep kiss. He missed the feeling of his fingers running through her soft hair, as he had never quite gotten around to removing her bun. 

He groaned as she nipped at his bottom lip--playful in a way no one would have ever imagined, before pushing him down once more. Tendrils of vines rose from the bare ground beneath him slithering over his body, pinning his arms to the loosely packed surface as her lips traveled down his thick neck, kissing, licking and biting her way to his shoulder. 

He never wanted her to let him go as she drew him on to release.

***

Charlotte felt her entire body shiver as Yami exploded within her. She imagined his eyes fluttering shut as he let out a long low groan and the rest of his body froze. The pulsing of his climax triggered her own release as she slowly ground her hips into his. She could feel his stillness everywhere except within her but had to rely on the memory of his face from the year prior in the near total darkness of the tent. She stroked his face, which had gone slack with the effort and release, before leaning forward to kiss his lips and lift herself off of him. Warm fluid ran down her leg and into the ground beneath them as she laid her head on his shoulder and pressed her body into his side. 

Yami wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly and squeezing her against him before he kissed the top of her head. Within his warm embrace, Charlotte found herself lulled to sleep by the beating of his heart as it slowed from the rapid pace it had as they made love.

As sleep took her, Charlotte wondered if love was truly what they were sharing, or if their encounters had been something else entirely. She wondered if it really mattered.

***

As the sky lightened and filtered through the fabric of the tent, Charlotte squeezed her eyes shut against the sun which had so rudely decided to interrupt their perfect night. At first, she was annoyed with the unexpected light, but then she flew into a state of panic.

"What time is it? I haven't missed reveille yet, have I?" She fumbled with her clothes as she rummaged through the pile they had pushed into the corner of the tent. Her heart raced once more, but when she had felt the furious pounding now, she only felt fear and not the wanton excitement which had filled her in the darkness. 

"The Captain is going to kill me if I'm late." She muttered as she pulled her blouse over her head and struggled to strap on the heavy breastplate she wore. Charlotte cursed herself and muttered under her breath as she hastily dressed. She cursed herself for being so easily distracted, for giving in--not so much to her desires as desire was never taken off of the table, but rather for giving in to them with a man.

Charlotte was not certain her Captain would understand, given her harsh attitude toward men in general. Charlotte, for the most part, agreed with the useless, pathetic nature of most men, but she did have her exceptions, even if they were very few and far between. She glanced back at Yami, his naked body sprawled on the ground in the narrow tent. She sighed as her eyes ran over him once more and she turned back to her task to hide her blush. 

Yami was definitely one of the very few she respected--not only for the magic he worked on her when they were together but for his strength, his clear thinking and his ability to take action where so few were able. 

Her desire for him rose once more as she thought about how his hands felt against her skin, and how he held her hips tightly against him. It would be so easy to simply curl up next to him once more.

But the thought of being caught coming from his tent, the thought of censure from her squad because she had given into her most base desires won the day. She sighed as she continued to dress. She refused to look at him, though she could feel the weight of him staring at her in the dim light of the dawn. She wanted to turn around, to see him standing there and to puller her back into him. She wanted to forget the war going on around them and to isolate this tent just big enough for the two of them. 

People stirring outside the tent spurred her on. Charlotte had already given up hope they would not notice as she tried to escape back to her side of the unspoken line between the squads. But still, she was determined to return, to escape, to pretend as nothing happened, or in the worse case, to admit that it did, but to assert the meaninglessness of the act. 

Of course, she would be lying, but she had not quite figured out what exactly her feelings could mean. 

As she fastened the bracer on her arm, Charlotte pushed back one side of the entrance flap, ready to leave, hoping no one would see. But as she was about to cross the threshold, Yai broke his silence.

"Happy birthday, Charlotte." 

The sound seemed to echo off of the canvas sides of the tent, filling her ears with the gruff musicality of his voice. She stood in the opening, frozen, her hand on the flap, the other on her hip. She wanted to turn, to look at him, but to do so would be to prove her weakness.

And weak was something she could not be.

Charlotte turned her head slightly toward him, looking over one of her shoulders. Yami had made no move to dress or even cover himself. Charlotte nodded before stepping through the door. She would already have hell to pay, she thought as a lone horn sounded in the distance, indicating the start of the day.

***

"Yami, are you alright? You seem distracted." Julius asked his young charge as he fastened his pale blue cloak around his shoulders. The soft fur of the over-robe was a fluffy contrast to the rest of him, yet it somehow matched his personality to a tee. 

"Hmm?" Yami asked as his mind wandered once more to the feel of her lips against hers before it registered the question his mentor had posed. "Oh, I'm fine, I'm just tired." Yami punctuated the statement with a yawn to prove his point. 

Julius looked at him, not entirely believing him, but knowing he should also not pry. Yami had always come forth when he was ready and in his own time. But Julius also knew Yami had had a companion in his tent. He wanted Yami to say it, though.

"Alright, if you say so." Julius looked at Yami a moment longer before he turned his attention to the skirmish at hand. 

Yami tried to focus on the job he was assigned, on the predicted movements of the attacking kingdom's forces, but he felt as if a spectral version of Charlotte had traveled with him. 

Every touch, every time his arm brushed against something, he could not stop the memories of her skin against his from rushing back. 

Dammit, he thought, before Julius summoned him to his side and giving him more specific and unique instructions. Yami shook his head in an effort to clear his mind. 

Later that day as the battle waged around them, Yami found himself surrounded by soldiers of the diamond kingdom pressing in on all sides around him. Slowly, slowly he was pushed toward the part of the field commanded by the blue rose knights as they all worked to defend the border from the threat of invasion. Julius had told him before the invasion that the diamond kingdom had not been nearly as bold in recent years. Yet now they seemed to be on every corner, threatening their way of life, pushing forward toward the capital. Even Julius could not guess as to why they had grown so bold in the last few weeks and months. 

Still, the fighting had been brutal and with no end in sight, despite being told diplomatic talks were underway. 

But now he could feel his back against the figurative wall. It didn't take much for him to break out of the box in which he had found himself, and when he did the next breath brought him a moment of panic. 

He saw her only a short distance away. She too was in a constant battle.

Charlotte could hold her own he knew, but that moment had only served to further reinforce the idea. 

But even the thorn princess seemed to have trouble with the group of mages rushing toward her. Yami raised his sword and moved to close the distance when he stopped short. 

Between his position and hers, a mage faced her, readying an attack. Green vines covered with thorns encased the man who stood between them. Yami's eyes grew wide as the briars tightened around the footsoldier. In the blink of an eye, he was gone, shredded into nothing, and blood splattered across Yami's face and robe. His eyes followed the green glow of the vines to their owner. Charlotte, he sighed. Memories of those same green vines creeping up his arms on the night prior came rushing back to him. She moved like a dancer, careful to avoid the blasts of magic flying toward her, as she countered with her own hungry vines tearing into the flesh of the enemies closest to her. She spun in circles, flailing her briar whip above her head, each flick of her wrist jerking her victims off of their feet. Her movements were a dance of death and blood, and Yami stood, transfixed. Her blond hair had come loose, though remnants of a bun still captured some of the golden strands. The braid which framed her face was soaked red and swung with each turn. She seemed oblivious to the blood smearing her own face and clothing as she continued on her path of destruction. The charge of a desperate soldier cut through the din of battle to his ears, but she only moved forward, deeper into the fray. 

She did not move to stop the attack as the soldier rushed her from behind. Either she didn't notice or didn't care. Seeing her peril, Yami moved faster than he ever had before, swinging his sword as he sprinted. A slashing cut of dark energy leaped from his blade, his own magic let loose and flew toward the attacker. The crescent of dark magic sliced through the mana barrier surrounding the enemy mage. Yami was right behind the dark slash, swiping his blade deeply through other man's flesh, leaving behind a blossom of red in its path. A strangled, gurgling cry erupted from the soldier's throat, and Charlotte turned toward the sound. She gasped and Yami looked up at her, meeting her eyes. The look lasted only a moment, but in it, he had tried to say so much. She nodded once before turning her attention to other quarries, her briar whip lashing out at the enemy soldiers. The vines she commanded continued to encase and rip apart the combatants as if they had a mind of their own. Yami breathed deeply of the stench of blood and death before shaking his head and focusing his attention on the battle around him once more. 

"Now is not the time," he told himself as he turned his back to her and fought his own battles. 

***

He saved me. Again. The thought echoed through Charlotte's mind as she moved instinctively through the fray. She had looked at him as he cut down the mage who had tried to sneak behind her for the kill. She wanted to thank him, she wanted to kiss him, despite the blood which soaked his robe and splattered his face. She had noticed he was not smoking one of those damnable cigarettes--the only other time he wasn't was when they were together. His mouth was otherwise occupied, she reminded herself with a blush. She was certain it was hidden beneath the sticky and drying blood smearing her own face.

Her recollections had left her open wide and inattentive as a fireball landed near her. She jumped backward, using her magic to propel herself further than her natural abilities would allow. 

"Stupid, stupid Charlotte," she berated herself as she landed. She took a step back, straightening and searching for the mage who had tried attacking her. Her back hit something hard, something which took her breath away, something which was heaving with an exertion of its own. The rapid pattern of breathing she heard and felt was familiar, as recognizable as her own. She felt the body against her back stiffen slightly before relaxing into a comfortable stance. She echoed the movement, stepping into a practiced form and complementing his movement. She looked again, spotting the target mage as another fireball arched through the sky toward her. Her thorns were faster as they erupted from the ground. The fireball faded from existence as his mana disappeared along with his body. 

Charlotte could feel Yami moving and fighting at her back, keeping her covered, while also fighting his own battles. As she moved through the field, he kept pace with her dance, turning and twisting in an effort to be her eyes where she had none. As they moved into the thick of the fighting, she found herself doing the same for him as she used her briars to supplement his magic. 

He didn't need her help, she knew. Yami was strong enough on his own. 

But the thought of even one attack getting through, even one missed second in command of the battle around him where he would be injured, made her heart want to stop.

And so she kept close enough to cover his back. She could not bear to imagine a birthday without him

***

The battle raged below as Julius watched with the Wizard King from the top of a rampart. Looking at the battle, he questioned the success of the supposed diplomatic talks with the Diamond Kingdom. The Wizard King had arrived earlier with news of the talks, but the battle was already at a fever pitch. 

The fighting had started in the morning simply enough, Julius knew. He had walked back through the path which had led him to the moment several times as the Wizard King's request. And now Julius looked forward, tracing the threads of timelines which wove together to create the tapestry of the current moment. He looked for weakening threads, thinning and fraying as death came for them. The ones he was certain would soon break, he broke, adding the remaining thread of time to his own, weaving the little bit remaining into his mana pool. He told himself what he did was a mercy for those who had fallen, cutting short the pain of death which would soon come anyway. 

The Wizard King had asked for a quick solution to the skirmish, an early end to the fighting for the day. Both sides, he had said, had news from the capital. An armistice had been agreed upon and a cease-fire called. Yet, once the fighting had started, it was nearly impossible to stop. 

Still, Julius would try to find a way. He was good at finding a way to turn the tide.

Another thread frayed, and Julius caught the end before it snapped off. A slight tug of mana and the remaining bit was added to his own pool of time. 

Julius winced as he watched the empty husk of the soldier whose last few moments he had taken was shredded into unrecognizable bits as sharp thorns wove through the space he had occupied. As he watched, Julius saw the thread of the briar mage begin to thin, a sure sign that death was not far behind. He sighed as he reached out with his mana for Charlotte's thread. He hated to take the time of a comrade and friend, but death did not discriminate and neither would he, not when he could ease the suffering associated with death. 

But before his mana reached her thread, the bright blue cord was shrouded in darkness, like a shadow had wrapped itself around the thread and somehow strengthened it. Julius shook his head and the tapestry faded back into people on the battlefield. 

He sighed in relief as he saw Charlotte continuing the fight, but now with Yami at her back. He watched for a moment as they moved in concert, complementing each other, guarding each other on instinct in a pas de deux of death and destruction. The pair seemed oblivious to everything except each other and what was facing them, but Julius recalled his own tunnel vision when on the battlefield. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. When he opened them once more, the tapestry had reappeared. He still had a job he had been tasked with, a job he had not yet finished. 

As he searched the timelines for a solution to his immediate problem, he was constantly beset with a problem he knew was years away, one he had been slowly working to solve for years. In the tapestry of the moment, however, he noticed the bright blue strand which had been wrapped in shadow had changed. The cords--blue and black--had now twisted around each other like a rope. Ever curious, Julius traced the rope's path from the current tapestry into future moments, and along the path, he was struck with inspiration. 

He wanted to follow further, to test his hypothesis, to push the idea to its limit, to see if he was right. But a wild bolt of lightning struck near his feet disrupting his concentration. 

"Another time," he muttered as he scanned the battlefield for the mage whose attack nearly hit him. Julius watched as his protege sliced the lightning mage in two while still guarding Charlotte's back. 

***

The next day, the war was over. The squads were packing up camp when Yami spotted Charlotte through the crowd of magic knights. She was dismantling her tent, as he had been when he saw her. He froze, his hands still in mid-action as he watched her. 

"The tent won't pack itself." A voice came from behind him. Yami shook off the longing he felt and turned his attention back to the task at hand. Yami could feel the gaze of his mentor and captain on him for a long moment before the scrutiny shifted away. The shift was only temporary as Yami felt Julius' eyes on him once more as he folded the heavy fabric into long strips. 

"She's pretty." The older man leaned over, whispering into his ear. "And you two work well together."

"We're... just friends." Yami folded the strip which had been a tent in half before rolling it tightly into a tight cylinder. He kept his eyes focused on the work before him in hopes of Julius ignoring the heavy blush he felt warming his cheeks. He had the feeling Julius was staring at him with his ineffable smile which he found infuriating.


	4. Night Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's a little more than a single night...

Yami's life had been quiet for the last several months since the war with the diamond kingdom ended. In recent weeks, there had been little to do. Even petty crime was down. Which meant Yami was bored. He knew he was making a pain of himself too, even though he didn't mean it. But having nothing to do always seemed to bring out the worst in him. He didn't exactly know why.

The arrival of the letter was unusual enough to break the monotony of the days. The contents of the note, however, turned everything upside down. Julius had handed the letter to him with raised eyebrows. He had no family, no friends to speak of – not anyone who would be sending him a letter anyway. Yami was as surprised as anyone to receive it. He held the cream colored parchment in his rough hands. The material felt fine and smooth to his calloused fingers. His name was written on the front in dark ink. At first, he thought it was black, but upon closer inspection, it was a deep midnight blue. The hand which had written his name was well practiced and feminine in the way it looped and curled the letters together. He heard one of the other squad members scoffing at him, wondering aloud who the foreigner could have possibly gotten a letter from. 

Yami ignored him and looked down at his Captain, his eyes as wide as they had often been when Julius had given him some new bit of information. Only he was taller than his mentor now. He had so many questions, but he knew Julius would not be able to answer them. He brushed his fingers over the envelope once more before backing away. If he were to find any answers, he would only find them inside. 

He waited until he was alone, but his curiosity got the better of him before he had made it to his own room. He ducked into a small alcove which typically housed a statue and turned the envelope over in his hands. The flap was sealed with a bright blue wax which shimmered slightly in the sunlight filtering through the windows. The design pressed into the wax was ornate, with curls and frills and flowers forming a letter. He almost did not recognize the 'R' in the design. 

But when he did, everything clicked together and his heart pounded.

"Charlotte," he whispered before breaking the seal.

***

Charlotte chewed on her thumbnail as she paced through the garden. Usually, the gentle breeze lifting the scent of the flowers through the air calmed her, but today, nothing seemed to help. The only thing on her mind was the letter she had sent. She had written it in an effort to get him out of her system and off of her mind. Pacing now, she tried to convince herself she had never meant to send it, but on a whim, she had. And now she waited for the fallout, for a response. 

In the boredom of the last few weeks, Charlotte had found herself thinking more and more of him. She had been able to put him from her mind for months, but as their birthdays approached, she began to grow uneasy for some reason she could not explain. And thoughts of him appeared once more. She had told exactly one person what had happened when her magic ran amok, and then when she had nearly died in the river. Charlotte had not gone into much detail, but she knew her friend, the one she had told, would read between the lines. She hesitated to tell what had happened in camp, but the look on her friend's face when she had asked the question told Charlotte that nothing needed to be said. Her friend had convinced her to write the letter, even if she never sent it. 

As she wrote, Charlotte pinned down the unease she felt. Somehow, some way, she and Yami had crossed paths on their birthday the last three years. Though she was not a big believer in predestined fate, she wondered if stronger powers than they were at work in these meetings. The questioned gnawed at her over the next week. Would fate intervene once more and bring her and Yami together? Did she want to rely on fate alone to do so? Or did she want to take fate into her own hands?

With her letter written, Charlotte decided to force fate to make a choice when she placed it with a courier bag to be delivered.

She paced the gardens since then, wondering what fate Yami would choose.

***

Yami read the letter once, then twice and then once more, as if rereading the words would help him understand them any better. Charlotte had written something about testing fate or forcing its hand, but Yami could not quite make out what she was talking about. He never really thought much about fate, and when he did it was usually to lament the job it did. But buried in the treatise, she had asked a question. The question was simple, straightforward, but completely unexpected. 

She had asked him to meet her for his birthday. 

She wanted to see him.

A slow grin spread over his face as he tried to keep himself from running to his room. 

Once behind closed doors he read and reread the note. She had said something about how things didn't feel right waiting to see if circumstances would force them together, like the last few years, how she wasn't certain she wanted to put such a meeting in fate's hands once more. She had asked if he might feel the same. 

Yami chewed on his bottom lip for a moment recalling the last three birthdays--his most memorable ones ever. He didn't often admit it to himself, but she was a frequent inhabitant of his mind. Even when he picked up another girl for a night or two, he remembered little things about those nights with Charlotte. Simple things, like the way the light reflected off of her skin, or how soft it was beneath his rough fingers. He would run his hands over another girl and wonder where the hair-thin crisscrossing of scars was on their arms. He always wondered about them but had never had a chance to ask Charlotte how they got there. The girls would moan or cry out and he would hear her voice.

Hell yes, he felt the same. Hell yes, he wanted to meet her for their birthdays. 

He pulled out a sheet of paper and wrote his reply. As he pressed the seal into the black wax on the back of the letter, a thought dawned on him and made him worry. 

Had Julius planned anything and not told him? 

The Aqua Deer captain had a habit of planning things without telling people and then expecting everyone to show up. Yami wondered sometimes if his mind was too stuck in the flow of time to really make sense of what was going on here and now.   
Julius had tried the few years after he took Yami under his wing to get the young man to celebrate his birthday, but he had stopped after all attempts had failed miserably. 

Still, Yami wouldn't put it past him to try again. He took the letter, his answer, with him and marched to Julius' office, praying the magic-crazed captain would still be there. Yami knocked on the door once, twice before he heard his boss call for entry. A surprise to them all, Julius was actually behind his desk working. Yami walked across the room with his eyebrows raised. 

"What is it, Yami? You sure bolted out of here after you got that letter."

"Oh, that? It wasn't anything important." 

Julius looked up at him, and Yami was certain Julius knew he was lying. Not that Yami was bad at lying – he was, in fact, really good at it. But he could never lie to Julius. Somehow the time mage had always seen through him. Fortunately, Julius rarely called him out on his lies.

"I, uh, I was wondering if you had made any plans for my birthday." Yami scratched the back of his head. "I mean, I know you haven't in a while, but I just need to know."

"Why? Do you want me to?" Julius looked at him with eyes widened in surprise. 

"No, no." Yami shook his head. "I hate parties, you know that."

"You have other plans?" Julius' lips crept into the ineffable smile he always had when he was teasing out the truth.

"I was thinking about it." There was no thinking involved. Yami had already made up his mind. He was going to meet Charlotte as she had arranged – at the noodle shop where they first took a leap with each other. 

Julius' smile turned into a full grin. Yami knew the old man had figured out something, but he also knew Julius would never tell him. Yami would have to piece the puzzle together some other time.

"No, there are no plans. Go, have fun doing whatever."

Yami breathed a sigh of relief before asking for two days off – one for his birthday, and the other for hers.

***

Charlotte had been anxious until the letter arrived. Three words were written in it, and two of them didn't really count as they were her name and his. The one other word was 'Yes', and Charlotte had never imagined such a simple word, three simple letters could make her heart beat so fast. She let herself relish in the agreement for a moment before a multitude of other logistical concerns erupted in her head. She sighed and began making a list. She was good with lists, and with planning. Those two characteristics were probably what got her promoted to vice-captain over her friends and colleagues, well, that and her magic power and control. 

She knew he wasn't expecting a party, and truth be told, neither was she. She had had her fill with parties as a child in her parent's home. But she did want to make the occasion special. Should all go well, she thought the night could be the start of something more intentional, something more like a relationship. But she wasn't even sure she wanted that. 

Still, it never hurts to make an effort, she told herself. 

The last three years of birthdays had been insane – and busy. She had hardly had a moment to relish the idea of being with someone since the day he had stopped the curse in its tracks. The first year had been a rush of relieved rebellion as she pushed against her parents' wishes and fought for her own future. The second year had been a release of fear and gratitude for what could have been. And the third... the third was a leaving behind of regrets.

Charlotte felt a tingle of anticipation as she thought about what this year might bring. This year was marked more by intention than anything else; she intended to see him, intended to give herself over to him with reckless abandon. What she wasn't so sure of was if she intended for anything more to come out of their mutual celebration. She only knew she would celebrate their joint entry into this world in the only way they seemed to know how.

And, she thought, she would let him see how much of a woman she could be. After three years of fighting, three years as a soldier, Charlotte grinned at the thought of being a woman for a change. And so the list formed in her head of what she needed to do.

*** 

Yami read and reread the letter so many times he could have recited it from memory. He knew exactly when and where she would be waiting for him. He knew the likely outcome should he meet with her as he had agreed. He couldn't wait to kiss her again. He couldn't wait to feel her body wrap around him as he knew she tended to do. 

But something about the plan had him ill at ease. 

He wanted her, he had no doubt. He was going to go because it was the only way he could think to fulfill his need for her. 

And then he knew what had been bothering him about the entire situation. He needed her, craved her in a way he had never needed anyone before. And the need scared him. He wondered if he would have been more comfortable with leaving everything up to that fickle bastard fate. If they were meant to be together this year, it would have happened, right? Only the more he thought about it, the more afraid he grew. What if fate would not conspire to bring them together? What if she was right to force fate's hand?   
Yami rubbed his eyes. Thinking along these lines always gave him a headache. And his mind had been spinning these circles for the last few days. 

"Whatever." He folded the note and tucked it away in a book in a drawer, hopefully far enough out of sight for anyone who might stumble into the room. Tomorrow was the day and he could change his mind with the dawn if he needed. He flopped back onto the too plush bed and covered his eyes with his forearm. The setting sun was splashing rays of red light in through the narrow window and across his face. "Red skies at night, sailor's delight," he mumbled the old proverb in the face of the crimson sky, wondering if the blood red sky was indeed a harbinger of his delight upon the morrow.

***

Charlotte drummed her fingers on the rough wood of the bar top. She glanced around the small restaurant, keeping a sharp eye on everyone and everything in the space. The old gentleman behind the counter recognized her immediately, though she had expected as much. She had, after all, grown up in the town. Her family had ruled over the town for generations and she had been quite the sensation, what with the curse and all. 

She regretted her decision to suggest the restaurant as their meeting place as soon as she saw the smirking smile the shop's owner had given her. Guilt rose up within her as Charlotte took the seat, but she refused to back down from the older man's gaze. She had already fought her father, all of the suitors he had chosen for her, and a million more like him – men who might respect her strength, but who saw in her something to control, to tame. She locked eyes with the older man, refusing to let the guilt over her actions consume her. Such guilt was for weaker women. 

And she was not weak. She knew she was not because he would not have her otherwise. Because he had told her she was strong. 

Eventually, the old man averted his gaze, turning his attention back to the task of caring for his customers. Yami would never back down, Charlotte thought, knowing how much his quiet strength and resolve drew her to him. 

Still, Charlotte took a seat at the wooden bar and fidgeted nervously. She placed a small box on the wooden surface before her as the old man returned to her, asking for her order. Charlotte smoothed the skirt of her dress over her lap, uneasy with the choice of garment now she was sitting waiting for him. 

"Tea, please." 

The old man sniffed as if he found the order distasteful for the cheapness of it, but Charlotte had never had much luck with alcohol, and she would not risk losing consciousness before he arrived. She ran her hands over the unfamiliar spread of the skirt, feeling them tremble despite the movement. She took a deep breath and placed her hands firmly over the box she had brought. She willed her hands to stop shaking as the old man placed a steaming cup of tea before her. Charlotte took another deep breath before she walked through the process of steeping and straining the tea from her cup. The warmth rising from the vessel brought her a peace she had not been able to attain through breath alone. 

Why am I so nervous, she thought. It's not like we haven't... been with each other before. This isn't any different.

But it was different. She knew it was deep down. Before there had never been any preface or expectation. Before it had simply happened. This time, however, was premeditated. Charlotte's mind began to fill with worries. Would they like each other? Would they find they have nothing in common? Would he live up to the imagined version of him? Would she live up to his version of her?

Wrapping her hands around the cup, Charlotte tried to will the worries away, as she had tried to still her hands before. The process had much the same effect. 

Charlotte sighed and blew a stray lock of hair from out of her eyes.

"I knew I should have worn it back," she muttered as she ran one hand through her long golden locks. 

***

Yami stood in the doorway, the fabric curtain which separated the inside of the shop from the rest of the world closing behind him. A blond woman sat at the bar nervously rubbing her hands against a deep blue skirt. Her hair hung in a sheet around her shoulders until she tucked one side behind an ear. The old man behind the bar placed a cup of something steaming in front of her before he looked up and caught Yami's eye. The corner of his lips turned upward briefly, acknowledging their shared past, though the old man was little more than a spectator. 

Nearly four years ago to the day, he had sat here eating when all hell had broken loose. He hadn't known anything about the curse at the time, what it was or why he had been able to stop it. Even in the years since Yami had not been able to get much more than the idea that he was in the right place at the right time out of anyone he asked about it. 

Four years to the day, almost, since she had followed him back here, since the first time she had kissed him.

Since the first time, but not the last time. 

The feel of her had been seared into his being so completely, so quickly, that it almost made him believe in fate. 

But looking at her now, her head bowed over the cup she held so carefully between her hands, slow even breaths expanding her back as much as the tight bodice would allow, he felt a flurry of emotions he could not quite comprehend. He reached backward toward the hanging fabric panel, the tips of his fingers brushing the rough material which separated the inside of the shop from the rest of the world. He wanted to run, but something about her sitting there rooted him to the spot. It was as if her magic had ensnared him. 

Who was he kidding? She had ensnared him four years ago. 

He took a deep breath, watching as she did the same. He took a step toward her than another. One foot before the other until he found himself sitting on the stool next to her. 

"Hey." He felt like his voice quivered, but she said nothing, just turned and smiled at him. Her blue eyes danced, disarming him as they sparkled in the orange glow of the lantern light. 

"Hey." Her voice sounded relieved, breathy as she sighed. "Happy Birthday." She slid a small narrow box across the bar top. 

"What's this?" He picked up the box, turning it over in his hands. 

"Just a little something that made me think of you. I mean, if you don't want it though..." She reached out for the box, but he wrapped his large hands around it and lifted the lid. Inside was a delicate fork-like object of dark wood so highly polished that it shone like a mirror. The two tines of the fork were long and curved upward slightly, and where they met, a jewel-colored flower – a chrysanthemum--sparkled like her sapphire eyes. 

Yami lifted it out of the box as a flood of memories struck him. He turned the object over in his hands, watching how the light danced on it. He felt his heart stop and he released a held breath which came out shaky for some reason. He heard a fit of laughter, quiet and familiar, yet buried deep in memories he had thought he had forgotten.

He finally heard Charlotte calling his name after she placed a gentle hand on his arm. the touch brought him back to the present, and he left his memories behind.

"Is everything alright?"

"Yeah." He looked at her and then glanced down at the delicate hairpin in his meaty hands. "It's beautiful." He kept his eyes on hers as they sparkled like the flicker of lantern light in the crystalline flower. He dared not risk getting lost in his memories again. 

"But I can't accept this." 

"Of course you can."

"But I don't have anything for you in return." He looked down at the jeweled object, risking the flood of memories once more. The touch of her hand and the tilt of her head as she looked at him kept him anchored to the present.

"You meeting me is enough, Yami."

He raised his eyebrows as he looked at the hairpin once more. Charlotte's touch kept him rooted as the memories rushed back – a woman with dark hair like his, long yet bundled up elaborately like a dark halo around her head. Similar bits of jewelry dotted the velvet halo, twinkling like stars in the lamplight. He couldn't make out her face. Was she a sister? Mother? He wasn't certain, aside from the fact that he knew her. 

And as he looked at the hairpin in his hand, he also knew what he needed to do with it.

"Maybe, but I still can't accept this."

Charlotte looked crestfallen, and then her face grew scarlet as his hands went to work. He stroked her hair back, twisting and curling it around itself, revealing one ear as he wrapped the hairpin and secured her loose golden strands into a simple twist.

"Because I can't use it." 

Yami felt his breath catch as she met his eyes, the blue crystalline flower a dark glimmer against her sun-like hair. She reached up to the small coil of hair, her fingers shaking as she touched the hairpin. The scarlet color did not fade from her cheeks as she took a deep breath and turned back to the cup of tea growing cold on the bar top. She took the cup in both of her trembling hands and took a long sip of the liquid. Yami watched as she steadied her breathing before he too turned to the bar and called over the old man to place his order.

"You look beautiful, by the way." He leaned over slightly so as to not be easily overheard. 

***

Charlotte sputtered at the statement. He had meant it for her ears alone, but she could barely hold in the tea she had just sipped as he spoke. She was no stranger to her own beauty; many called her conceited in her aloofness when they commented on her appearance. She knew she was conventionally attractive, where he, with his foreign exoticism and overly muscled physique, was not. She also knew he found her attractive--she doubted they would have slept together more than once if he did not. 

But to hear him call her beautiful... she had never imagined it would be possible. 

Once she got over the shock, she felt a grin forming on her lips. She did her best to hide the upturned corners of her mouth behind her cooling cup of tea. 

The old man had returned with Yami's drink in a small carafe and placed a small dish before him before pouring the clear liquid from the bottle into the dish. 

"So, do you want something to eat, or are you planning to take over my storeroom again?" 

Yami coughed as he brought the dish of liquid to his lips. Charlotte felt the burning in her cheeks once more. 

"I would like my grandmother's favorite again if you will." Charlotte straightened her back, taking on the air of authority she often forced when she felt awkward or embarrassed. The old man nodded and Charlotte felt herself relax as he turned his attention to Yami. She touched the hairpin now holding her hair back from her face. She wished she could see it and how it looked in her hair. When she had purchased it, the merchant had not known what it was or really where it had come from, but something about the design reminded her of Yami's grimoire and of the sword he carried. She glanced at him, noting its presence at his side as if it were a part of him as much as his grimoire. When he picked it up the first time, he grew distant, like his mind was somewhere else, like he recognized the jeweled stick. She wanted to ask him about it, but he seemed distant after he twined the object into her hair. 

They sat in silence, sipping their drinks and barely glancing at each other. Charlotte felt as uncertain as she had the first time they had sat at the counter. She hoped the food would arrive quickly, so she would have something to occupy her mind. Instead, everything seemed to drag and time moved like molasses. She glanced at him, his eyes forward, his jaw clenching and relaxing as he held the dish to his lips and tilted it back as the liquid in it ran into his mouth. She watched the muscles of his neck tighten as he swallowed. She wanted to press her face, her lips against his neck, to lay her head on his shoulder. She wanted him to place his arms around her and wrap her up so tightly she could barely breathe. Truth be told, she had wanted his touch for much longer than she wanted to admit. But now he was here, she did not quite know how to ask. 

Should I just do it? She thought. Should I throw all caution to the wind?

She turned back and sipped her tea.

***

Yami hadn't even planned on drinking, and yet he ordered the sake without a second thought. He had wanted a perfectly clear mind when it came to Charlotte, but his heart was beating too fast and his hands wouldn't stop shaking. The drink helped, but it couldn't make up his mind for him. He wanted her – oh gods how he wanted her. She had become his fantasy, his ideal, his goddess, but now, sitting next to her, he wondered again if this was a good idea. 

He glanced at her as she sipped her tea. Her profile was sharp and angular like the thorns on her briars, but it was also soft in a way as well, with roundness in her full lips. And the way she halfway lowered her eyelids as she sipped the tea reminded him of the way she looked down at him before she kissed him in the firelight of the small shelter she had made two years prior. He wanted to lean over and breath her in, to kiss her cheek if only to feel the softness of her skin beneath his lips. 

The proprietor of the small restaurant placed a dish of soup before him and a plate before her, breaking the spell of memory and scent and desire he was weaving on himself as he watched her. The flavors wafting upward from the food made his mouth water and his stomach grumble, and Yami realized he had been too nervous to eat earlier. He attacked the dish with gusto. After a few moments, he glanced at Charlotte once more only to see her delicately and methodically working her way through the dish of what looked like fried noodles tossed with vegetables and chunks of meat. 

She was taking her time, he noted and tried to slow his own pace, reminding himself that he was not in the squad's mess hall. 

"Is the soup as good as it was last time?" She asked upon slurping up a long noodle. The noodle flicked against her nose as he turned to her, leaving a streak of dark sauce on her pale skin. "Because this is better than I remember." She turned to him, smiling. Her eyes crinkled in the corners just a bit as her lips parted slightly in an embarrassed grin. The dark streak against her nose seemed completely out of place. Yami reached out and wiped the sauce away. He absentmindedly licked his finger. 

Charlotte turned red once more and giggled. She seemed to fold in on herself just a bit and he wondered if he had crossed a line.

"Sorry," he said before turning back to his own meal. He froze as she touched his arm.

"It's alright. I'm guessing I looked pretty silly." She pulled her hand away quickly as if she was suddenly afraid of something. She turned back to her noodles and prepared another bite. Her face never strayed from its crimson hue as she went to tuck her hair behind her ear, only to realize partway through the motion that it was tied up in the coil he had used to secure the hairpin. 

Oh, what the hell, he thought as he watched her. She might slap him, and he was prepared for that as he leaned over and brushed his lips against her cheek. The touch was light, brief, but he had gotten close enough that the smell of her overpowered the scent of the restaurant, that the taste of her skin on his lips conquered the lingering flavor of his meal. He wanted to lean into her further, to kiss her neck, her lips, to pull her close to him and wrap her in his arms.

Instead, he turned back to his soup and settled for watching her reaction out the corner of his eye. 

***

The feel of his lips on her cheek made her freeze. She inhaled sharply and her mind went blank for a moment. She always seemed to forget everything when he touched her. But the kiss was over quickly and she released an unsteady breath. She chewed on her bottom lip wishing he hadn't stopped, yet knowing she had the power to do something about her desire as well. She wanted him, though she hated to admit it sometimes. And she really wanted him now. She could feel him glancing at her, sidelong curious glances as if he was amazed she hadn't slapped him. 

Maybe she should? Maybe she would have, had it been any other time and place. But she had already decided tonight she would give in if he wanted her. She would give in to her own desires, let her heart run the show and make her mind, her rational self take a seat for a change. 

She reached out for his arm once more, her fingers stroking the back of his hand. The touch drew his attention fully as he turned to where her hand rested on his before looking at her. He clenched and relaxed his jaw in a way which made her heart race. His tongue darted between his lips, wetting them as his eyes flicked toward hers before meeting her eyes once more. She couldn't be sure in the uneven lighting of the restaurant, but his cheeks seemed just a touch more red than usual. With his tawny, olive skin, he didn't seem to show his embarrassment as obviously as she did. His dark eyes seemed more luculent than she had ever seen them, bright and wide, and eager in a way she never thought they could look. 

She brushed her fingers up his arm and he inhaled sharply before letting the breath out slowly. 

Just kiss him, dammit! She yelled at herself, chiding her inefficient toying. She didn't want to play with him, not like this. She wanted more, she needed more. She turned on the stool to face him before she slipped from the elevated seat. The movement felt like an echo of the night four years prior, when she had first made the decision to kiss him – a birthday present for her as much as she insisted it was for him. She had shocked him then with the first kiss, but this time, he leaned into her, meeting her halfway and pulling her closer. 

Charlotte felt a rush of power and tingling as his lips met hers and his arms wrapped around her waist. And she felt herself fall once more. She realized she would fall for him over and over with every kiss, every touch, and she would fall willingly as long as he would let her.

He pulled his lips away from hers only to press their foreheads together. She heard a sad whine as she opened her eyes, only to realize the whine had come from her own throat. His eyes were still closed, she saw, and his hands moved blindly to her cheek. She leaned into the roughness of his hand, ignoring the scratchy feel of his calloused fingers. His touch was like lightning or fire, and it wiped out any discomfort she might have had. 

He tilted her chin back toward him and kissed her lightly before pressing their foreheads together once more. He spoke in a husky whisper, his voice raspy with desire.

"Should we take him up on the offer?" 

Charlotte felt she could hear the amusement in his voice. She knew he must be joking as the restaurant's owner had not seemed too thrilled at the prospect of losing his storeroom once more. Truth be told, Charlotte was not too keen on using the small room again either. 

She shook her head and ran her fingers down his chest and over his thighs. She heard him suck in a sharp breath as she skimmed him with her fingertips. She had made arrangements, plans for this inevitability before she had sent the letter. She wanted him, yes, and she was going to have him. Satisfied, he wanted her too, she grew emboldened.

"I have other arrangements." She hoped her voice sounded as seductive to him as she had planned. Not that she thought he needed much more convincing. she could feel the surprise in the muscles of his face as his eyebrows shot up and his cheeks tightened asymmetrically, giving him the cocky smirking grin she often found infuriating

"Oh really?" His hands were at her lower back once more, stroking up and down the small of her back. "Care to enlighten me?"

"Maybe," she purred, her hands sliding down his arms to where they held her with a desperate grip. "But first, we should finish dinner." 

He turned back to his soup and began inhaling it. Charlotte watched him for a moment before turning back to her own meal. She tried not to rush, but she felt herself eating faster than was usual as her eager desire and her desperate longing sprang forward. 

"Done," Yami announced as she was carefully coiling up the noodles around a fork. He let his spoon rattle in the bowl as he placed his elbow on the bar and turned to watch her. Charlotte wanted to speed up under the scrutiny of his gaze. He watched her every movement, his eyes flicking to various parts of her, but always coming back to her eyes and mouth. She could feel his eagerness creeping into her and she sped up her pace just a bit. She tried to resist the increased pace, as well as her desire to look back at him. Her cheeks and ears grew warm under his stare and he had reached out across the narrow space between them to caress her knee. 

Charlotte had known what the endgame would be when she had sent the letter. The touch didn't bother her, but she had never really imagined he would be so public with his desire. He leaned toward her, his lips brushing her ear. She froze, waiting for him to whisper something to her, but no words came. Instead, his hot breath warmed her skin further and his tongue flicked against her lobe. Charlotte swallowed hard, nearly choking on the noodles in her mouth. She coughed and he scooted closer to her, placing his hand on her back. 

"I have so many things I want to do with you." The words finally came in a warm, rough whisper. He pressed his lips against her skin where her jaw met her neck, and Charlotte felt her head swim.

"Maybe you can let me eat so we can get to those things faster?" Her voice sounded breathy to her ears. "And maybe take care of the bill for dinner?"

Yami groaned a bit before kissing her neck once more. He waved down the owner, but a younger man approached him instead as the old man worked the grill preparing a meal for another patron.

"Yes, sir? Was everything to your liking?" 

Charlotte concentrated on the plate before her as Yami talked with what appeared to be the owner's son. She paid little heed to their conversation as her mind reeled at the thoughts of what Yami wanted to do with her. She had a few ideas of her own as well, gathered from a friend she trusted to not tease her or to divulge her secret. 

Charlotte stared at her empty plate for a moment, conflicted over what would happen next. She had thought she would be ready, that her excitement would overpower her nervousness, but now, with dinner past her, she felt a strange sense of apprehension. The feeling was mixed with desire and excitement for the moment, but the question of what it would all mean in the end loomed in her mind once more. 

She looked over at Yami who had taken to staring at her again. His face was softer than she had ever seen it before, more relaxed. Charlotte thought it must be due to the alcohol. He had a small smile on his face, just an upturn of his lips really, not a full-on grin. He had not lit the cigarette which stuck out of one side of his mouth. His elbow was on the bar top and he leaned against his fist as he watched her. His eyes were hooded, making the dark depths of them seem even darker and more shadowed. 

"Ready?"

She nodded, wondering how he kept his cigarette from falling out of his mouth as he spoke. And then realizing she didn't care about the answer, only that asking the question helped her ignore the pounding of her heart just a bit. 

He was standing next to his stool, his hand outstretched for her. She slipped off of the stool unaided, but when she glanced up at him, she saw a flicker of disappointment in his eyes. She was so used to doing things for herself, she felt automatic derision when offered help, rejecting it without a thought. And he had four years ago, told her she didn't need to do so, that sometimes help is needed, and to accept offered help was not weakness. She had still not internalized the idea. 

But still, seeing the flicker of sadness in his eyes hurt her. She slipped her arm around him, linking them together, but not quite as intimately as holding his hand. Linking arms felt more formal, Charlotte thought, maybe? She glanced around the small restaurant, wondering if they had looked as goofy as the couple sitting in the corner table making lovey-dovey eyes at each other. 

"Ready." She said, still wondering at the breathiness of her voice. His arm was hard, firm beneath her hand. She could feel the corded muscles through the thin layer of fabric on his shirt. She appreciated his effort at looking presentable, but she also wished she could touch his skin directly. She sighed. That would have to wait for later.

***

The evening air was warm and the setting sun cast an orange, golden light along the streets. Charlotte wove in and out of alleyways, crisscrossing the main thoroughfares of the town. Her hand was tightly wrapped in Yami's as he followed along the path which seemed almost familiar. Eventually, she led him to a large manor house set on a hill near the center of town. The building was enclosed by a short stone wall and a wide lush yard. A garden flourished along one side, near a room which seemed to be made entirely of glass. 

Yami thought he had definitely been at the house before. He remembered slicing through thick vines covered in thorns, like giant versions of the creeping roses he saw peaking over the fence. 

"Wait." He stopped short, tugging on her hand as he stepped to the threshold of the manor, where the wall separated those who dwelled within from the rest of the world. Charlotte turned to him, a look of eagerness and confusion on her face. 

"What is it?"

Yami looked around at the yard and garden from their vantage point of the gate. Such beautiful and well-kept places tended to make him uneasy. In the past, when he had first arrived in the Clover Kingdom, before the Magic Knights, before Julius, he had resorted on occasion to theft as a means of survival. Such places were prime targets – when the security was low at least. And this building gave him a vague feeling of unease unrelated to the day he had stopped her magic from going out of control, but he couldn't quite place the memory. He shook his head, trying to dismiss the feeling.

"Are you sure this is alright?" He looked up at the grand old house skeptically.

"It's fine. My parents haven't been here for my birthday since... that day. It's pretty much abandoned most of the time." 

Yami looked at Charlotte's ease with the estate and saw further confirmation of how different their two lives had been. Even though now they both were Magic Knights in service to the people, their histories could not be more different. She smiled at him and took a half-step closer, placing her hand on his chest. The touch calmed his worries. Her smile soothed him. 

God, she has such a beautiful smile, he thought, wishing he could see it more often. 

"You sure no one is there?"

She boosted herself up to her toes and kissed him softly.

"Positive. Now, come on." 

She entwined her fingers through his once more and tugged him behind her toward the large building.

*** 

Charlotte fumbled with the doorknob as he breathed down her neck. She was nervous, far more so than she thought she would be. She had been so certain when she planned it all, so eager when they had left the shop to come here. But something had made him reluctant and now her own uncertainty was asserting dominance. 

Maybe this was a bad idea, she thought just as the knob turned despite her sweaty palms and the door pushed opened. 

The room was just as she remembered it, with white billowing drapes framing the large windows. Her ample bed--ornately carved dark wood--stood against one wall with a matching armoire on the other. She did, however, expect a layer of dust covering everything from years of disuse as she had not stepped foot in her childhood room since a few days after the incident. 

The first time, she corrected herself as she scanned the collections of trinkets and trappings which had been her life for so long. It was a life she had long ago put aside, but after the curse had triggered four years prior, she had decided to bury it. Now was her chance to put it to rest for good. 

Yami must have sensed her uncertainty somehow because his strong arms – arms she had longed for over the last four years – wrapped around her and pressed her into his chest. His lips brushed her ear as he murmured something she could not quite make out. He propelled her forward from where she had frozen in place, into the space she had once called home before he nibbled at her neck where it met her shoulder. She couldn't help the giggle which erupted forth. 

"Stop. That tickles." She squirmed against him as he nibbled at her again.

"I know." His voice sent her body quivering and she turned to face him, spinning in his arms. As she did so, he pulled her hips against his and caught her lips in a desperate kiss. She kept her eyes closed as he pulled away.

"So, the room you grew up in, huh?"

"How did you know?"

She felt a brush against her cheek and tilting of her chin upward before a soft kiss on her lips.

"The entire place screams you, Charlotte." He pressed his forehead against hers in the way which made her sigh. If he asked, if only he asked, she would do anything for him. But he never did. She forced a kiss, pulling him further into the room. She had chosen this place for a reason. She needed him here, now. She needed to prove to herself she could, that her father's opinions didn't matter anymore. They hadn't for a long time, not really until she stepped foot in this room. She pulled him toward the bed, determined to have his touch burn the past from her memory. 

He stepped away from her and held her at arm's length. She looked up at him worried, wondering if she had been too aggressive. She knew he liked tough girls, and she had long ago proved she was tough. But now she wondered if she had been too forceful.  
He smirked down at her.

"What's the rush? Afraid someone will find us?" He held her chin and kissed her nose.

"I... No." She sputtered. 

"Good." 

Charlotte felt his hand brush against her bare skin and then the cool air kiss it as the dress she wore slipped from her shoulders. Before long, the bodice was loosened enough to slide down to her hips and then fall to the floor. Yami stepped back and looked her over. The undergarments she wore beneath the dress clung to her skin. Charlotte reached briefly for the fabric pooled at her feet but stopped herself before she went too far. 

I asked him here. I wanted this, she reminded herself, stopping mid-motion. She straightened and squared her shoulders. Her heart beat rapidly as she stepped out of the gown and kicked it away with her foot. She met his eyes and noticed for the first time how goofy his smile was as he looked at her. The smile wasn't quite a grin or a smirk. It was something else, something precious and rare.

"What?" She asked as he seemed to chuckle. Her voice trembled a bit and she hoped he would take it for laughter. 

"You're beautiful is all. It never ceases to amaze me."

Charlotte could feel the flush through her entire body. he closed the short distance and kissed her with as hungry a desire as she had kissed him before. She laid her hands against his chest and whined against his lips as his tongue darted into her mouth. She wanted to feel his skin against hers. While she appreciated his effort to look presentable, she missed the warmth of his skin against hers. And now the evening air was chilling her to the bone. She tugged and pulled at the fabric, all the while as he kissed her, guiding her slowly across the room. He parted his lips from hers just long enough for her to pull the shirt over his head. As soon as he was free, he devoured her lips once more. In a step or two as she shuffled backward, relishing in the feeling of his flesh against hers, she hit the edge of the bed and sat hard on the cushioned surface. 

He pushed her down, crushing her beneath his larger mass. Her body screamed in joy at the feel of him over her, at his lips teasing her sensitive skin. He nipped hard at a spot on her neck before maneuvering himself between her legs, his lips and tongue tracing the curves of her breasts and belly. His head had disappeared from sight, but she could still feel his hands grabbing at her breasts. He kissed the inside of her thigh. She lifted her head just enough to see the dark spikes of his hair sticking up from between her legs. His eyes were closed and the lower half of his face disappeared beneath her. 

And then she shivered, convulsing as his mouth sucked and licked at her sex. She was no newcomer to the feeling of oral play; such practices were common among her sisters in the squad. But the way his stubble rubbed against her changed the experience in a way she had never imagined. Her sister knights had always made a point of mentioning how men were not as capable at such forms of pleasure, at how they had their own ways of bringing a woman to climax, but how they were not even necessary for giving pleasure, and how they rarely understood how to do so. Charlotte believed them, even after the last three birthdays with Yami. He had proven their point about a man's ability to give pleasure time and again, but she had never imagined he would equal her sisters in their ability to stimulate her in the way they had held sacred. 

Charlotte's body tingled and she ran her fingers over his scalp and through his thick hair. She locked her legs around his arms as his finger continued dancing over her breasts. He grunted as his tongue teased at her sensitive skin, flying in rapid motions at the tight bundle of nerves before diving deeper, plunging within her. Her hips bucked upward at the sensation, and he pulled backward. He untangled his arms before pressing his lips against hers once more. The scent of her own arousal filled her senses as he thrust two fingers inside her. She bit his bottom lip as their movements caught her off guard and her body convulsed once more. She panted as his breath warmed her skin at her neck and ear.

"You like that?" 

He moved his fingers once more, stretching her, stroking her in a way no other person had ever done. 

She whimpered in response, her hands reaching for him, clawing at his skin. She wanted more. He lay next to her, his head propped on one elbow, his other hand stroking her womanhood and sending tingling waves of pleasure through her body. He kissed her lips, her breasts, and teased her hard sensitive nipples with his tongue.

She could barely breathe, and when she looked at him, the self-satisfied smile on his lips sent her in a strange rage of desire.

"Dammit, Yami, just fuck me already."

"Ooh, Her Thorny Majesty is so crude underneath it all, isn't she?"

She tried to give him a withering glance, one she knew worked on most men but had never had much luck when it came to him. His grin only grew and his eyes danced, daring her to do something, anything about the sweet agony in which he had placed her.  
Charlotte squirmed next to him in an effort to free herself and take control of the situation. She knew what she wanted, she knew he wanted it too, but he refused to give it to her. She pushed him back onto the bed, straddling him. She could feel the pressure of his erection against her, despite the fabric of his pants holding him in. She leaned over him, her breasts dangling in his face as she worked him free of the barrier between them. She sucked in a sharp breath as his mouth captured one of her large breasts once more. His eyes danced playfully when she glanced back at him, as he teased her. But within seconds, she had earned her prize as his cock was freed and she settled herself over it. She teased the tip of it, rubbing her sex against it before settling over him and letting him fill her. She sat still for a moment, enjoying the fullness of him within her, how it stretched and pressed against all parts of her. His breathing had grown ragged and quick, his hands gripped her thighs as his hips rocked slowly beneath her, shifting the pressure slightly with each movement. She started matching his movements with a counterpoint of her own, tempting him with an increase in pace. His hands move from her thighs as they contracted and relaxed with each rocking motion, to cup her breasts at the bounced. The roughness of his calloused hands against her nipples, coupled with the feel of him touching her in places only he could reach, sent her body over the edge quickly as she felt herself squeezing against his large cock within her.   
She collapsed against him, panting. She smiled at the soft chuckle which rumbled through his chest. The pressure of his lips against the top of her head encouraged her to prop herself up and kiss him properly. As she leveraged herself up and away, he flipped her on to her back again and looked down at her with a sly smile. 

"My turn." His voice was a rough whisper as he thrust into her once more. Charlotte's mind was incoherent as she gasped for air beneath his weight and the forcefulness of his movements. Sensation exploded through her extremities, sending a tingling numbness up her arms and legs into her core until all that existed was his rhythmic movement and the ragged breaths coming from her lips. After the shortest eternity in existence, Yami's motion stilled and Charlotte felt him pulsing within her. She tightened her legs around his hips, pulling him more deeply within her. He hovered over her face, eyes closed, finding her lips by memory before he collapsed next to her. He lay on his back, his chest heaving with exertion. Charlotte rolled over, propping herself on her elbow as she looked down at his serene face. He slid one arm beneath her and pulled her closer, nestling her against him. She laid her head on his chest and listened to his racing heart slow into its normal rhythm. He squeezed her tightly against him and kissed her head once more before he drifted off to sleep. Charlotte propped herself up once more to watch him. She let her eyes wander over his naked form – well-sculpted, but unacceptably grotesque by most standards of beauty. She traced the outlines of his defined muscles, caring little for how everyone else saw him. She thought he was the most beautiful man to have ever existed. 

And she smiled because she knew as her eyes roamed over the length of him, her hand following, down his chest, belly, and then thigh, and then back up again. She ran her fingers lightly over his cock, and he moaned softly at the touch. She smiled in her knowledge of his body, and in his knowledge of hers. She brushed her fingers over him again, more confidently touching the part of him which could bring her so much pleasure. She sat up as his cock seemed to swell beneath her fingers, widening, lengthening. She understood the concept, of how an erection worked, and even though she had been on the receiving end several times before, she had never watched one in the making. 

Charlotte chewed on her bottom lip as she looked at his engorged member. His hand sleepily rubbed against her, stroking her thigh. She looked at his face, still calm, and back down to his growing erection. She licked her lips, wondering what had spurred his own oral explorations earlier. She had heard from the girls in the squad who preferred men – and there were a few--about the things a woman could do to drive a man wild. She had heard them describe the mechanics of orally pleasing a man, but as the thought to try entered her mind, she hesitated. 

"You don't have to do anything if you don't want to, Charlotte." 

Her head spun to the sound of his voice. She had thought him fast asleep, but he watched her through narrow slits of eyes. 

"I'm not sure if I want to or not."

He sat up, wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back next to him. She stretched her body alongside his, nestled in his embrace. 

"Then just stay here." Yami yawned and then nuzzled the top of her head.

"Would you want me to?"

He shrugged in response as one hand slipped from her hip and onto his cock. 

"I never want you to do anything you don't want to do."

Charlotte watched as he ministered to himself, as his fingers slid against his member, trying to memorize the grip and rhythm of his stroking. She reached a tentative hand out for it and her fingers encircled the base before sliding up the length to where his fingers worked. He took her hand and arranged her digits in a specific way, pressing down on them as he moved them up and down, showing her, teaching her how to pleasure him. 

"Like that?"

"Yeah. That's good." His voice was breathless. "Real good."

Charlotte felt a small satisfied smile turn up the corners of her lips as he sighed under her touch. Eventually, he took over, changing pace and pattern as he gripped at her hip. He groaned and slowed as a thick white fluid sputtered forth before grabbing the nearest thing he could find to clean himself up.

"Sorry." The sleepiness had returned to his voice and he pawed at her, pulling her closer to him.

"It's fine." She nestled down against him and let the warmth of his body lull her to sleep.

***

The sun shining through the window assaulted Yami's eyes and forced him to squeeze his eyes shut. The weight of Charlotte's head against his arm had made it fall asleep and he felt pins and needles tingling through his fingers as he tried to move out from underneath her. Despite everything, however, Yami felt refreshed in a way he couldn't remember ever feeling before. He has slept more soundly with her than he ever slept when he was alone, though he wasn't sure if it was simply because she had exhausted him, or if it was something else. 

She had turned over and put her back to him at some point in the night. As he extracted himself from her, he also was drawn in by how the light played on her skin. He could feel his desire growing for her again. He kissed her shoulder and ran a hand over her hip. Her soft moan as she turned toward him only heightened his passion for her. He drew his fingers up her soft belly. Her eyes fluttered opened and she smiled up at him.

"Hey." She said, sleep still heavy in her voice. He leaned over her and kissed her softly once, twice, and then as he found himself kissing her a third time, she met his lips with a voraciousness he had not expected, but which he found most welcoming. 

"I want you." He whispered as his lips began the slow trek down her neck. 

She pulled his face back to hers and fixed him with a smoldering gaze. 

"Then what are you waiting for?"

He groaned as he dove into her once more. 

***

Charlotte could not keep the small smile from dancing on her lips as she walked back into her squad headquarters. The two days she has spent with Yami had started rough and awkward, but had fulfilled her in a way she had not expected. Her friends started teasing her as soon as they saw her.

"Must have been some party." her friend Mira had said as they ate in the mess hall together. The short brunette grinned wickedly as she looked over at Tricia, who simply pushed up her glasses.

"It wasn't a party. I just spent some time with a... friend." Charlotte explained for what felt like the millionth time. But regardless of how often she had said it, she still could not keep the smile from spreading over her face.

"A party for two then?" Mira leaned forward on the table and whispered conspiratorially. "So, is your friend a woman or a man?" She waggled her dark eyebrows as she asked the question. Charlotte rolled her eyes, but her grin only grew larger.

"Mira, stop teasing her. Charlotte is obviously in love. What does it matter who it's with?" Tricia's small voice was barely audible over Mira's bawdy laughter. 

"Thank you, Tricia." Charlotte glared at Mira after nodding appreciatively at the mousy young woman. Mira only laughed more loudly.

"Well, if it was a man, Lottie, I hope one of you at least thought to use protection." Mira wiped a tear from the corners of her eyes as she chuckled and dug in further by using a nickname Charlotte hated, but which only a small handful of squad-mates could get away with using on occasion.

Charlotte's blood turned cold as she replayed the recent time with Yami. She skimmed through the moments, searching her memories for the small little detail. She could not believe she had forgotten something so important, something so ingrained into all of them when they joined the squad. The captain frowned upon her girls having such dalliances, and the consequences of them, but she also was pragmatic enough to know they would happen regardless. She had her reasons for encouraging relationships between the female knights among the squad. 

Charlotte's heart raced as she confirmed her suspicions. She, at least, had been negligent in the matter. Her mind worked through calculations, counting days until her next cycle and days from her last. She thought she should be safe. Besides, she told herself, it wasn't the first time they had been so remiss in their lovemaking. But Charlotte made a point to remember next year because it would only be a matter of time if she didn't take precautions. 

***

A few weeks later, Charlotte sat in the communal bath with her friends. Both women complained about how painful their cramps had been the week before during their cycle and argued over the cause. Mira was convinced the new chef's diet had made them all more susceptible to the pain, while Tricia complained about the lack of raspberry tea to dull the effects. Charlotte listened to her friends' discussion as the sudden realization came upon her. 

Her own cycle had not yet come. 

Charlotte took a deep breath and rework the dates in her head. She had for the last several years, started her cycle with the rest of her cohort in some strange sort of synchronization no one could quite explain. She too should have suffered the cramps and bleeding along with her friends. 

And yet, she did not. Nor did she miss them. She had gotten so busy with a mission, she had forgotten entirely. 

But now, her nerves were rattled and she found it difficult to breathe. Suddenly the bath was too hot for her taste.

Her friends prattled on, calling out to her as she climbed out of the large warm pool. Charlotte dismissed them with a wave and slipped into a robe. She walked the hallway aimlessly, eventually finding her way to the infirmary. The young apprentice, Amberlyn, looked at her curiously as she walked into the room. 

"Charlotte? Are you alright?"

"I, um. I don't know." Charlotte hugged herself tightly. She looked at the ground before she met Amberlyn's green eyes. "I think I might be pregnant."

"What?"

"Shh. I don't want anyone to know." 

"Alright. Well, let's do a few tests then, so we can be sure one way or the other, alright?" 

Charlotte nodded as Amberlyn motioned for her to lay on a narrow healing table before she closed the door behind them. 

"What makes you think you might be, uh, you know?" Amberlyn surrounded Charlotte with a bubble of water through which she was able to diagnose injuries and diseases with her magic. 

"I, um, I had a... really good time with a friend of mine for my birthday."

"This friend is male, I assume."

"Yeah."

"And you two didn't..."

"No. I know the Captain always warns us to be careful, but I was..."

"Young and in love." Amberlyn finished the sentence for her.

"I was going to say 'foolish and negligent', but I guess that as well."

"And how long ago?"

"A couple of weeks."

Amberlyn's bubble of magic faded and she sat down on a stool, her hands folded in her lap. Charlotte looked at her neutral face with fear coursing through her veins.

"You missed a cycle?"

Charlotte nodded.

"A couple of weeks is still too early to tell much. I can sense something... irregular, but it's not distinct enough to tell what it is. It could be nothing, or it could be something. Besides, this early, miscarriages are common. Most happen before you would even realize you were pregnant."

Charlotte sat up, sighing at the news. 

"So what should I do?"

"Wait a couple of more weeks? If your cycle doesn't start by then, come back? And in the meantime, try to figure out what you want to do if you are."

Charlotte nodded, feeling a numbness within her. She tried to cling to Amberlyn's assertion, to believe it was just a fluke and that everything would be back to normal soon. But something didn't sit quite right within her. Something inside felt different, changed. 

Charlotte tried to ignore the feeling, but a few days later it still had not subsided. Charlotte walked uneasily through the hallways of the squad base, glancing at her sisters in the knighthood as she passed them, wondering if they could tell. Her cheery demeanor from the weeks following her rendezvous with Yami had all but vanished, only to be replaced by a strange paranoia.

Two weeks later, and Charlotte was fairly certain she was pregnant. Her cycle was still absent and the alien feeling within continued to grow. She was grateful she had not suffered the illness she had seen other sisters succumb to in the early parts of their own pregnancies. They had been swiftly and summarily dismissed once their condition was made known and they made the decision to continue with it. Charlotte had been able to hide her own state rather well, but each day brought was a new gauntlet of worry. 

Amberlyn confirmed her suspicions quickly upon the next examination. Charlotte was filled with dread.

"I don't have to tell the Captain immediately. You know what she will do." Amberlyn frowned, her arms crossed over her chest

"It's either the knighthood or the child." Charlotte's voice was flat, matter-of-fact. She had circled back between the two options constantly for two weeks, never able to choose one or the other entirely. She could not turn her back on the knighthood; without it, she felt as if she was less than nothing. And yet, she could not terminate the pregnancy. She had known for a long while now that she loved Yami. She wanted to be with him, but she wanted to walk with him as his equal, to stand beside him, to fight at his side. While she might enjoy letting him lord over her in intimate moments sometimes, she could not, would not submit to him as a lesser role. And so, she felt she could not be with him if she was not also in the knighthood.

And yet, she wanted this child, his child growing within her. She wanted to be the mother to his child. She wondered if it would be a girl or a boy, what they would name it, or if it would have dark hair like its father or light hair like hers. 

And so, Charlotte found herself going through the circle debating her options once more as she lay in bed. She stared up at the ceiling and groaned as she covered her face with her pillow.

"There's got to be another way." She muttered into the darkness. but nothing came to her except sleep.

The next day, she along with a couple of other squad members accompanied their captain to the capital for an accommodation ceremony. He was there with his captain looking incredibly bored and aloof. Their eyes met across the aisle only once, and after the heavy blush that landed on her cheeks, Charlotte was determined for that one look to be the only time she got caught up in his gaze that day. 

But as she watched his own commendation – to the rank of Senior Magic Knight, 1st class no less, she had an idea. 

A couple of days after the ceremony, she found herself outside of the Aqua Deer headquarters. She had needed the time to sort through her feelings and the rudimentary idea which had taken root. She also had to work up the nerve to tell Yami. She still wasn't certain she had managed to do so. Besides, it had taken a couple of days more to be granted the meeting with the person she sought.

She was escorted to Captain Julius Novochrono's office by a young aide about her age. The aide hesitated to let her in despite the appointment and he stiffened as he opened the door as if he were afraid of something. But the image which greeted them both was of an affable man with blonde hair and a secretive smile sitting by a fireplace reading a book. 

"Ah, welcome to the Aqua Deer, Lady Roselei. Come in and have a seat." Charlotte flinched at the use of the title. She had joined the knights to avoid such formality.

The aide waved Charlotte forward before backing out of the room and closing the door behind them. 

"Thank you." Charlotte took a seat across from him. "But Lady Roselei is my mother. Please, call me Charlotte."

"Of course, Charlotte. Shall I call for refreshments or would you rather get down to business?"

Charlotte took a deep breath.

"I have a... situation."

"Oh?" The tall man leaned back, crossed one leg over the other and steepled his fingers beneath his chin. "Right down to business, I see. And how might I help this situation?"

"Well, you are a time mage. Your ability to stop and manipulate time is... nearly legendary."

"Is it? I don't follow legends much."

Charlotte started to protest, stopped, took a deep breath and refocused her thoughts.

"I was wondering, your time stop spell..."

"Chronostasis."

"Yes. How small can you make one?"

"How small?" His eyebrows shot upward, curious.

"Yes. You see, I'm pregnant."

Charlotte could see the rapid calculations going on in his mind. 

"My captain has a rule that suspends indefinitely any squad member who gets pregnant until they give up the child. But I love my job and I can't just quit. Neither can I give up the child."

"Why not?"

"Excuse me?"

"Why can't you give it up? People do it all the time. I've lost track of how many I've undone over the years, and you certainly don't need a time mage to do it."

"I, I am not certain if I want to keep the child or not. I'm not ready to give it up, or to make that decision."

"And you don't want to lose your commission because of it."

"Exactly."

Julius sighed and tapped his fingers against his lips. 

"I've never made a stasis sphere that small. Usually, they are the size of a full grown human. Nowhere near the size of an embryo." 

Charlotte watched as he stared off into space trying to reason his way through the problem.

"No. That won't do either. It would need to be... hmm... Well, it's an interesting problem. An interesting solution too. We can try it, I guess. How does the father feel about this?" He caught her off-guard.

"I, um, well, he doesn't know."

Julius' eyes widened and he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Doesn't know that you are doing this or doesn't know period?"

"What does it matter? It's not like I'm married or anything. I mean it was just a one-time thing anyway, so why should it matter?" Charlotte looked at the fireplace crackling beside them. Her cheeks burned with the lies falling so easily from her lips. Her heart wanted to break with every word. She wanted to tell him. She knew she should. She planned to tell him before she left.

Julius watched her for a moment. Charlotte glanced at him before turning back to the fire. She squirmed in her chair, wondering if he could read her mind. 

"If it doesn't matter, then why try this at all?"

The question froze her to the core. It did matter. She loved him and she wanted to be with him, to have a family together. Someday. Not today. But even though she wanted him so much, and he had been so kind, so gentle and caring, he had never said anything to her to indicate he wanted the same thing. 

Julius sighed. 

"But it's an interesting problem and now that you've put it in my mind, I have to try it out. So, if you're sure..."

Charlotte looked at him and nodded. 

"I'm not sure it's going to work. It could do more harm than good, make it impossible to have kids later, or it could just not work at all." 

"I understand."

"As long as you are certain."

"I am."

Julius stood and Charlotte followed suit. He placed his hand on her belly. 

"If this child survives, I can already tell she will be powerful." 

Julius smiled as he manipulated the flow of time around the small knot of mana within Charlotte's belly, closing it off from the rest of the stream into its own tiny bubble. He looked up at her with a sadness in his eyes that did not match his earlier fascination.

"It's done. I hope. It should last as long as you want it to. If you want it undone, come see me again."

"Is there any other way it could break? Or do you have to open it yourself?"

His brow furrowed in thought for a moment.

"It shouldn't open on its own. I mean, I guess if I died beforehand then it would."

Charlotte sighed in relief. She rubbed her hands over her belly, where her child was now stored safely, or so she hoped. She could no longer feel the sensation of growing mana within her, the uneasy feeling she was sharing her body with another. 

"Thank you, Lord Julius."

The sad smile passed over his lips once more.

"Just Julius. And Charlotte, please tell him."

She had no need to question who he wanted her to tell, but the look in his eye as she left made her wonder if he knew. Had he somehow read the child's past or the child's future? Charlotte stepped out of the door and shook her head. She did not have time to worry about such things. She had work to do, far too much work she had let slide over the last couple of weeks of paranoid anxiety.

*** 

Yami saw Charlotte as she turned a corner that led to the exit of his squad's headquarters. He had not expected to see her so soon after their birthday tryst, and now it was the second time in a week. He hadn't been able to talk with her at the commendation ceremony, not with her sisters swarming around her like bees. He wanted to tell her how proud he was of her. He wanted to hold her, to kiss her, to tell her so many things which had been running through his mind as of late. 

And now, she was too far away to catch her. 

And he had too many things to do, not the least of which was to check in with Julius. Apparently, the old man had some new mission for him. 

Yami knocked on the door before pushing it opened without waiting for an answer. He only knocked out of respect for Julius. Had it been anyone else, he would have just barged in.

Julius was sitting at a desk scribbling in a small, red, leather-bound notebook. Yami had seen it before on several occasions but never been given the opportunity to peek inside. Julius always stashed it away before he had a chance to look. 

He closed the book quickly and tucked it into a drawer before looking up at Yami with a sadness in his eyes.

"Oh, Yami, right." Julius picked up a piece of paper and held it out for him.

Yami looked at the paper, then back to Julius, who seemed to have returned to normal. The glimmer of emotion Yami thought he had seen had vanished. He took the paper but didn't look at it.

"Is everything alright?"

Julius gave him a small, secretive smile that Yami had never been able to crack.

"Fine. Now get to that." Julius nodded toward the sheaf of paper in Yami's hand. "The problem won't solve itself, but please try to keep the collateral damage in check this time?"

Yami scoffed at the restriction and finally turned his attention to the mission he had received. He wanted to ask about Charlotte, but Julius had already turned to other matters. Instead, Yami turned to the door, vowing to ask later.

Julius watched his protege walk to the door and sighed. The ball of mana he had trapped just moments ago, halting its growth had felt peculiar and familiar. The quality of it was distinctly different from the woman who housed it, in whose body it would be nurtured eventually, hopefully. Not to say it was completely different, but it had been different enough. And the differences were where it felt the most familiar, like a dark cloud swirling within her. As the door slammed shut – No matter how much he had tried, Julius had not been able to break Yami of the habit, Julius shook his head, wondering if he had done the right thing. 

"She needs to tell him." He muttered to himself before he put his work aside and snuck out of the window in an effort to clear his head.


	5. Night Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Plans loosely made the year before are disrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> only mildly edited, so forgive grammar mistakes. May go back and fix later. If you see something glaring, please let me know so I can fix it quickly.

"Yami, can I speak with you a moment?" Julius called out to the black sheep of the Azure Deer squad. Yami started at the summons, surprised his mentor still had the time for him. Preparations had been furious as news of the last Wizard King's retirement broke a couple of months ago. Julius, as the prime candidate for the role, had been extremely busy and had passed the day to day tasks of running the squad to his vice-captain while he prepared to take on the mantle himself.

  
Which had left Yami in a lurch. No one especially liked him, not the rank and file of the squad, not the upper tiers, and especially not the Vice-Captain. Even William--the other of Julius' "projects"--kept his distance, though Yami had suspicions he reasons were different from the others. The only highlights of his days in the recent months had been the missions he was sent on, but even those had become few and far between, out of spite Yami suspected. And when he was bored, his mind always went back to one place--Charlotte.

  
As he followed his Captain into the office, he wondered if she would ask to see him again. Their birthdays were approaching, and last year she had challenged fate by asking him to meet her. But he had yet to hear from her regarding a similar meeting. Perhaps he should be the one to make a move?

  
William was already in the room when Yami followed Julius through the door. The desk which sat near the window was covered with two large pieces of cloth. And Julius wasted no time getting down to business, in a most un-Julius-like fashion.

  
"I know things haven't been easy for either of you since you decided to follow me, and I know it's not gotten any easier since the announcement, but I want you both to know how proud I am of you, of how much you have grown. You have both exceeded my expectations by leaps and bounds, and I..." Julius sniffed and wiped a hand over his eye. "Sorry, I told myself I wasn't going to get emotional. When I am formally recognized as Wizard King, I feel I would be remiss in my duties if I were to leave you where your growth would be stifled."

  
Yami snorted. Stifled was a polite way to describe it, he thought.

  
"Besides, the two of you already equal, in my mind, to Charles. It would be difficult for all of you to work effectively together." he continued. "So, my first act as Wizard King will be the formation of two new squads."

  
"What?" Yami asked in disbelief. William stood next to him serenely. But Julius continued.

  
"I am giving you each a command. Build the squads however you wish, do with them what you have always done--protect the people. And know that no matter what, you have my faith. I know it will be well rewarded."

  
William stood up straighter next to him, while Yami's mind whirled.

  
"The formal appointments will take place next week." Julius moved around the back of the desk and motioned for his two protégés to come forward and look at the sigils which had been chosen for the two new groups. He made a surprised noise as another piece of information clicked in his mind. "Oh, Yami, the ceremony is on your birthday. I guess this is one hell of a present."

  
On the desk lay two banners. One was a rainbow of colors highlighted by the face of the sun rising from behind hills. The other was black and gold with what looked like the skull of a bull emblazoned on it. Yami smirked as he looked at the rich black fabric draw light into itself much as the dark magic drew in the magic surrounding it. William touched the golden rainbow banner with awe, a small smile on his lips. Yami had never gotten a good read on the guy, but he guessed he was happy about the recognition. Yami looked up at Julius who seemed to be waiting for them to say something, anything.

  
"You sure this is a good idea, Old Man?"

  
Julius gave him the ineffable smile Yami had never quite been able to crack.

"Yeah. I am."

Yami shrugged.

"Well, I guess I won't let you down."

"I will do everything in my power to lead this new squad to greatness, Julius. You have my word." William added. Yami rolled his eyes and wondered just how much the younger man had kissed ass to get where he was.

"Yes, well, I expect nothing less, from either of you. Now, if you excuse me, there are many other preparations to be made."

"Of course, Captain." William bowed formally before turning on his heel and leaving. Yami shuffled his feet for a moment.

"What is it, Yami?"

"Does it have to be on my birthday?"

"The date was set by the King himself. I had little control over it."

Yami sighed, frowning.

"Why? Did you have other plans?"

"What? No. I mean, nothing concrete anyway. It just feels like it's going to be a big deal."

"Yami, I know you aren't the most comfortable with these sorts of events, but it is important. Besides, it's finally a way for you to stick it to everyone. I mean, none of them will be able to say anything once you're the captain of your own squad." Julius' smile turned sly and Yami chuckled.

"You always know how to string me along, don't you?"

"I've had a few years’ of practice."

"Right." Yami nodded and then shook his head as if he were still trying to wrap his break around everything.

"Now, I hate to run you off, but I have things to do, so shoo. Go start thinking about how you're going to run your squad or something." Julius waved him away. As the door closed behind him, Yami's mind raced. He had no idea what he needed to do, or how he might go about the business of recruiting, finding a base of operations, or anything. But he did know one thing for certain. He needed to write to Charlotte.

***

Charlotte waited expectantly for a letter for days, though she didn't really know why. She never expected him to write her, even if she always hoped he would. She resigned herself to asking again if he wanted to see her for their birthdays, but it took several more days for her to find the time to write him. On the brief downtime during missions, she composed the letter, but when she returned to headquarters to write it, she found a letter waiting for her.

The parchment was sealed in black but with no other identifying markings beside her name. She could only imagine one person who would mark their thoughts in such a manner.  
Charlotte bit her lip and hurried to her room where she snapped the seal quickly and skimmed through the letter. Her face fell at the first line.

"Well, shit." She muttered, before quickly covering her mouth with the letter and glancing around the room to see if anyone had heard. Then she remembered she was in her bedroom, alone, yet wishing she wasn't. She read through the letter once more as the longing she had suppressed for nearly a year welled up within her. She forced herself to a state of calm, to deny herself once more. But what she had read struck her deeply.

There would be no secret rendezvous, no tryst in the darkness. Not this year. The celebration marking the ascent of the twenty-ninth wizard king was being held on his birthday. She, of course, knew the event was coming. Everyone did, even if the date had not yet been announced. Charlotte expected the official announcement soon.

But the letter contained more, something she had not expected. Yami was to be promoted, to be given his own command. She wondered if he would be taking over the Aqua Deer. She chuckled at the prospect. His temperament didn't seem suited for the squad now; she could not imagine what it would be like for him to be in charge of them. However, because of the promotion, she knew he would be at the ceremony.

"I wonder if I will be sent out on a mission again," she muttered as she folded the letter up and tucked it away in a drawer with the last letter he had sent--a letter with one word of consequence... Yes. "If not, maybe I can go to the ceremony myself." She pushed the drawer shut and began stripping herself of her road-worn gear. Exhaustion hit her as she tried to maneuver the pieces into place so she would be able to see him soon. She slipped into a simple shift and made her way to the bath. She needed a long soak to think and hopefully to get him off of her mind.

The bath didn't work. Some of her sisters had taken to growing playful with each other amidst the hot water and steam. Watching them only made her think of him more, only made her want him near and to be playful with her. She left the bath in a huff which her friends didn't understand. She flopped naked on her bed and closed her eyes, trying to imagine his touch. Failing at that, she rolled into a ball on her side and stared into nothingness until sleep came.

The next morning, Charlotte woke to a loud persistent knock on the door and a summons to the Captain's office. For the last year, her heart had raced every time she was called to meet with her superior. She dressed quickly, wondering if this time would be the time she would be dismissed if somehow her secret had been revealed. She hurried out the door praying the summons would not bring the worst sort of news.

The summons was not bad news; in fact, it was very good. In several ways. Charlotte had also been invited to the commendation ceremony and the formal ascension of the new Wizard King, not just out of chance, but because she too was to be commended for her work. But the news of her own advancement was only part of the smile. She knew she would be able to see him. Now she only had to find a way to get him alone.

***

The lead up to the ceremony was a whirlwind which swept Yami along in its wake, and he was having a miserable time of it all. He had to start looking for potential recruits, find a base of operations, approve designs for the robe and standard, and frankly, he wanted none of it. He was flattered Julius had chosen him, but he also wished the Old Man had found someone else.

As Yami looked through the lists of candidates he could pull from to start the group--soldiers from various companies who had never qualified as a magic knight or who had never taken the test, bureaucrats, and others, he wondered if recruiting from another squad would be frowned upon. He smiled at the thought of asking Charlotte to join him, but figured the Blue Rose Knights wouldn't take too kindly to the transfer. He still had made no decisions by the time the day of the ceremony came to pass. And he had little hope of getting anything done after the squad was officially formed and he was in charge.

He still thought, at least in part, that Julius was nuts for giving him a command.

And now the day had come when he would take that step, and he had no idea what he was going to do.

"One hell of a birthday," he muttered as he took his place in line next to William. The younger man stood serenely despite his gaudy mask. He was dressed crisply in the pale blue of the Aqua Deer robe draped over his shoulders. He looked over at Yami and smiled in a way too reminiscent of Julius.

"How goes your preparations?" William asked and Yami couldn't tell if he was really interested or making small talk. Yami shrugged in response. How was he supposed to say everything was falling apart around him and he didn't know what to do?

"About as good as can be expected. You?"

"Splendidly, thank you." William turned his attention back to the procession into the hall. Yami watched him for a moment longer. Something had always seemed off about the guy for as long as Yami had known him, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what, only that his ki was weird.

  
The line of people started moving forward and Yami had to skip forward to keep up. Because of the momentousness of the occasion, the entire affair was being held in the cathedral of the capital. Typical commendation ceremonies happened in Magic Knight headquarters on a regular basis. But it wasn't every day a new Wizard King was appointed, or elected, Yami wasn't sure which or how Julius was chosen.

  
He filed into the grand room along with the other candidates for advancement and into the row of chairs at the front. He glanced over across the aisle and saw her. She too was sitting in the front, but her eyes were focused on the retiring Wizard King, who stood front and center. He felt his heart skip a beat seeing her there, but then a realization dawned on him. If she was there, seated in the front like he was, she too would be awarded with a promotion or at least recognition.

  
Well, there goes my first recruit, he thought, though he never really believed she would leave her squad to join him.

  
The ceremony was long, dull, and drawn out and Yami had to catch himself several times to keep from falling asleep. Charlotte's commendation, however, had caught his attention, though he wasn't certain if it was her deeds or the way she walked up to the dais which attracted him more. He groaned deep in the back of his throat, as quietly as he could, but he felt William and Julius both look at him in response. He quickly looked away to the pattern of inlaid marble on the floor. He noticed she had left off the breastplate she had taken to wearing while on missions for the formal occasion, and Yami found himself most appreciative of the fact. Perhaps too appreciative as his mind began to wander into places inappropriate for such a public event.

  
Once she returned to her seat, the newly minted Vice Captain of the Blue Rose Knights, Yami lost interest in the proceedings once more. At least until it was time for Julius' formal ascension and the retirement of the previous Wizard King. All the captains had a role to play as they presented him as the candidate chosen from among peers. The King was present to approved the selection and the former Wizard King robed Julius in the formal chains of office himself, smiling the entire time. Yami had to admit Julius seemed to be born to the role as he stood at the top of the dais next to the King and the former holder of the office.

  
"One day, we may be up there ourselves." William whispered to him.

  
"I hope not." Yami said before glancing back to where Charlotte sat across the aisle.

  
With command of the Magic Knights formally passed on, Julius began his first act as Wizard King. He called up Charles, the Vice Captain of the Aqua Deer and officially promoted him to squad captain. The old man grinned slyly at Yami and William as he returned to the ranks. His face fell, however, as Julius called both of the younger men up to the dais.

  
"Now that the mantle has been passed, the time for change is upon us. I will vow to do my best to protect the people, all of the people, in the kingdom whenever a threat arises. To help accomplish this goal, and to recognize the merits of two outstanding Magic Knights, I have, with the approval of the King himself, decided to form two additional Magic Knight squads."

  
A murmur rippled throughout the packed chamber. Voices of dissent mixed with voices of excitement at the news, but Julius silenced them all with a simple holding up of his hands.

"I know this may come as a shock to you all, as this sort of expansion has not happened in generations, but believe me, it is needed for the safety and security of our kingdom. And I can think of no one better suited to lead these two new squads than these two young men--William Vangeance and Yami Sukihero."

The voices returned with some complaints over the two chosen leaders echoing more loudly than others. Yami felt William flinch at the complaints, but he stood stoically with no change in expression aside from a glance at the masked man beside him.

"Both of these men have fought bravely and with great diligence for all of you since they have joined the Magic Knights. Both have sacrificed throughout their lives, both give their all in everything they do."

"But one's a bastard and the other is a foreigner! The fact they are knights is insult enough. How can we accept them as Captains?" A cry of argument came from one of the nobility in audience. Julius looked at the man with a patient stare, but Yami could feel the anger seething beneath his mentor's surface.

"Strong words from one who has never served, Lord Bamilton." Julius looked at the plump, mustachioed man for a long moment before the noble folded beneath the weight of his stare before continuing.

"We must, now more than ever, recognize the service all citizens can give to the kingdom. We all have a role to play, and that role need not be defined by our birth, our gender, or our nationality. This bastard and foreigner have dedicated their lives to safeguarding all the people in this great kingdom, and by rights of service, deserve this honor more than anyone else I know."

Yami tried to keep his mind focused on the ceremony, or barring that, blank, but his eyes drifted to where Charlotte sat. She looked up at him with a small smile on her face, and Yami straightened under the scrutiny.

Julius paused in his speech, as if he were daring anyone else to criticize his actions. After a long moment, he beckoned the pair to turn and face him. First William's robe was removed, much as had been done with Julius earlier. A banner was unfurled from the rafters, it's riot of rainbow colors contrasting with the dark woods of the cathedral as it joined the other Magic Knight banners. A new robe, pale gold with accents of blue and red were placed on his shoulders. Compared to the light blue of the Aqua Deer robe, Yami thought the new color scheme worked well with the mask William always wore.

"I will do my best to live up to your expectations, Lord Julius." William bowed in respect to his mentor.

"I am certain you will do so." Julius gave him a warm smile before turning to Yami. For once, Yami had to look up to meet Julius' eyes as the older man stood on one step above him.

"It's been a while since I've had to look down at you, Yami." Julius chuckled.

"Yeah, well, maybe you're shrinking, Old Man." Yami's eyes darted around and he rubbed his fingers together. He wanted a cigarette. William shot him a disgusted glance, or perhaps it was jealousy in his eyes? Yami knew on one else had ever been able to talk to the time mage like he did. Truthfully, he shouldn't have been as disrespectful toward his mentor as he was, but he could not help the words which tumbled from his mouth sometimes.

Besides, he thought, Julius knows I don't mean it.

He glanced back over his shoulder, feeling Charlotte's eyes on him.

"Yami Sukehiro, when you joined the Magic Knights, you were charged with the protection of the people of the Clover Kingdom. You have shown your worth through many deeds and have risen through the ranks of your peers. Now, I task you with leading a new group of Magic Knights. Do you accept this new challenge to lead and guide them as you have been guided, to the best of your ability?"

"I guess it would be problematic if I said 'No' now, huh?"

"Yami..." Julius' voice had an edge of warning.

Yami took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Lead and guide, huh? he thought, wondering who in their right mind would follow him.

"Yes, I do."

An aide stepped behind him and unfastened the fluffy light blue robe which lay on his shoulders and removed it. He had always hated the formal robe and rarely wore it. He would have never worn it if he could have avoided it, but Julius insisted for at least formal occasions. Despite the thickness which trapped heat and the weight of it pressing down on his shoulders--all of which he typically found annoying, he felt a strange absence without it. Another aide held out a neatly folded square of black and gold. The first one took it and wrapped it over his shoulders, fastening it in the front. The new robe felt light and airy, and it was cool against his skin. But somehow, it felt heavier.

Once the clasp had been attached and the fabric sat evenly over his shoulders, back, and chest, a ripple of fabric, like a flag waving in the wind cut through the murmurs in the room. A large black banner, emblazoned with gold, hung from the rafters, a subtle contrast to the dark wood of the room, but distinctly different from the other banners which adorned the ceiling. The black field was as dark as his magic, where all the other banners seemed to scream light and life, and the golden shape on it was shaped not like a shield as all the others were, but rather like a skull of a bull. Yami smirked and shook his head.

Leave it to Julius to immortalize a joke, he thought.

"You like it?" Julius smiled at him with a twinkle in his eye.

"You're an ass."

Julius' smile widened to a grin as he chuckled. He motioned to the two newly appointed Captains to turn around. William's eyes narrowed as they looked at each other before turning to the crowd.

"People of the Clover Kingdom, I present to you the Captains of two new Magic Knight squads." Julius placed his hand out over William's head. "Captain William Vangeance of the Golden Dawn." He extended a hand toward Yami. "And Yami Sukehiro of the Black Bulls."

Yami rolled his eyes as a light smattering of applause echoed through the room from the crowd. Some of the most enthusiastic recognition came from the Magic Knights, and Charlotte, having caught Yami's eyes, clapped politely, yet had a grin so big it could have lit a fire. Yami rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment at the display.

***

After the ceremony, the Magic Knights proceeded to return to the building which served as the home of the Wizard King and the base of operations of all Magic Knights. While the individual squads had their own headquarters and usually operated independently, all squads had a presence in the main headquarters. In times of national emergency, or in times of celebration, a contingent of all of the squads could assemble in the building.

Today, the grand hall was set up for a banquet rather than as a war room. Banners representing all of the squads, from the most ancient to the newly minted, hung around the walls. The two newest squads hung over the dais where the Wizard King took his seat on a large, carved, wooden chair, which reminded Charlotte of the throne the King used on the rare days he gave audience. She had only had the privilege of seeing the actual King twice before today, and only once in the throne room in which he held audience, but she had been a young girl then.

Lord Julius, now seated on the wooden thrown, cut a more impressive figure than her memory of the King. He looked regal in a way the King did not, as did the two new captains who stood next to him. She watched Yami out of the corner of her eye from the floor of the room, where she was mingling with her own squad members. He fidgeted and rocked back and forth on his feet, looking as uncomfortable as she had ever seen anyone look. He rubbed his fingers together and occasionally, she could see him start to bring his hand to his lips, only to stop and put it back down by his side with a grimace. His behavior reminded her of the time three years ago when he had jumped into the river after her. She smiled at the thought, realizing he must have been aching for a cigarette.

"Charlotte, what do you think?"

The question in her friend's voice cut through her thoughts like a knife and she turned her head, eyebrows raised, back to the knot of Blue Rose members.

"Hmm?" She asked, hoping for a repeat of the topic of discussion. Mira cocked an eyebrow at her and then followed what had been the path of her gaze. Charlotte grew red as Mira looked at her once more, her expression begging for answers to questions unasked, and a promise to get those answers at all costs.

"I asked what you think of the two new squads." another member of the Blue Rose Knights said, oblivious to the silent discussion between the two best friends.

"Oh, I, well, I guess if the Wizard King says the squads are needed, then they must be."

"You have fought with Lord Julius before, haven't you?"

"Once or twice, yes. I was assigned a position near the Aqua Deer during the last war with the Diamond Kingdom. We crossed paths then."

"What about the new captains? They both seem so... atypical, so different, from all of the other captains."

"Yes," yet another member pipped in. "They both has such sordid backgrounds. I hear William Vangeance never takes of that mask ever. What do you think he is hiding there?"

"And that Yami Sukehiro..." A third gossip started. Charlotte's mind filled in the rest of that sentence ten times over with various options she would never admit to thinking publicly, but none of them were what the other woman had in mind. "I hear he does more damage on his missions than he actually ever solves."

"They call him the God of Destruction for a reason." The first gossiping member leaned in conspiratorially. Charlotte glanced back at him quickly, wishing he would come and destroy her in the way he did so well. She bit down hard on the inside of her cheek in hopes of driving the thought away.

"Charlotte, you've met him before, haven't you?" Mira asked, a knowing look in her eyes.

"Who?" Charlotte tried to play dumb, but her friend was having none of it. She may have been able to keep the extent of her feelings for him buried much of the time, but Mira always seemed to know something more was going on, even if she never forced the issue. But now, after a couple of drinks, Mira was pushing for information in a way she never did before.

"The new captain, you know, the foreigner." Mira waggled her eyebrows.

"Yami?"

" You two are on a first name basis? Just how well do you know him?"

Crap, Charlotte thought. She could not bring herself to tell them how well she actually knew him, or how much she was thinking about him, wishing he would pull her away somewhere private, or how dexterous he was with his fingers. The last thought brought the scarlet color back to her cheeks, and this time she could not hide the blush from her friends and colleagues.

"Not very well, actually." Technically, it wasn't a lie. There was still so much she did not know about him, even if she knew other parts rather intimately. "Though he did save my life a couple of times."

"But well enough to use his first name?"

"Well enough to know he hates formality." She glanced back at him and the way he fidgeted in the spotlight. "But then, who wouldn't hate being the center of attention like that. Especially after that noble called out in the ceremony."

"Yeah, well, Lord Bamilton has always had more hatred for people he didn't deem worthy than he had sense." Mira said with disgust.

Charlotte chuckled. She glanced back to the dais once more, and Yami was gone.

***

"You should go talk to people, Yami. Mingle." Julius said to the young man standing next to him, though he never took his eyes off of the crowd.

"You're the only one who tolerates me, Julius." Yami eyed the crowd skeptically as he fidgeted where he stood. The urge for a cigarette only grew. He spotted Charlotte in the crowd, a delicate glass of champagne in her hand, but she rarely sipped on it. He watched her blush from the distance and glance over his direction. She met his eyes briefly before looking away, back to the conversation in which she was involved. He tried to scan the crowd, to find someone, anyone to which he could talk, to follow Julius' advice.

But he kept always going back to her. Whenever he caught himself, he tried looking away and to keep from staring, but it was his birthday and he had grown used to having her as his present. He hated not being able to spend the night alone with her. Instead, he had to endure this torture.

"I think there is at least one person out there who would enjoy your company."

Julius' voice shook him out of his thoughts and Yami felt an uncharacteristic warmth in his face, as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn't have.

"I don't know what you are talking about." He rubbed the back of his neck and flicked his fingers, wishing once more for a cigarette.

"Charlotte. I see you looking at her. Go talk to her."

"No." He wanted to sprint over to her and whisk her away, but he knew she would take issue with such a public display, especially given how she upheld the reputation of her squad, even more so now she was their Vice Captain.

Yami sighed as he watched her a moment longer.

"I need a cigarette." He admitted, no longer able to ignore his need. He bounded from the dais and out the large glass doors to the balcony. The night air was cool and crisp where the day had been warm but not too hot. He was thankful for the light layer of protection offered by the new robe he wore. He fumbled with shaking hands as he reached into his belt pouches for his cigarette and the tools with which to light it. He inhaled deeply and felt himself immediately relax as the burning smoke filled his lungs. Everything about it was heaven.

He stood at the railing through one cigarette and was on his second when her blonde head appeared next to him.

"Happy Birthday and Congratulations." Her voice was lyric and made his heart race. The cigarette had helped to calm his nerves, but her presence near him sent his desire through the roof.

"Thanks. And to you, as well, Vice-Captain."

He was reward with a reddening of her cheeks and a broad embarrassed smile as she looked down at the railing upon which she leaned. Watching her profile, he resisted the urge to touch her, to stroke her hair or to plant a soft kiss where her neck met her jaw. Being close to her, he could not deny how much he wanted her.

"Though I guess that means you wouldn't join my team." He had never meant to ask and chuckled as a way to brush off the idea as he looked out over the city. She gasped and looked at him, but he couldn't tell what she was thinking. Was she flattered he would ask? Did she think he was crazy? A little of both?

He laughed like it was a joke before turning back to her.

"You look good in black. Suits you much better than the light blue which I've only seen you wear like, what, two or three times?"

"Yeah, it was a constant fight between me and Julius." he laughed. She smiled and it infected him. He found himself grinning at her. Her crystalline eyes seemed to almost shine in the dark from the lantern light reflected in them. He looked around the balcony and through the windows into the grand hall before meeting her eyes once more. He leaned forward and brushed her lips ever so gently.

"Happy Birthday, Charlotte." he whispered as his face hovered near hers, his eyes still closed. He could hear her breathing and feel her indecision in her ki and the tension in her body. He straightened and looked at her, meeting her eyes again.

"I'm sorry we couldn't celebrate it like last year." she said breathlessly.

"You, uh, want to ditch this?"

"I can't. You might be Lord Julius' special little project, but I can't just disappear." She glanced back to the crowd in the room, worry evident on her face.

Yami could no longer resist. He leaned on the railing and let his fingers brush lightly over her arm. Touching her soothed him almost as much as the cigarette had.

"Just for a little while?"

She looked back at him, and then back to the room, weighing her options. He could see her desire in her eyes warring with her sense of duty.

"I guess no one will miss me for a bit."

Yami's face erupted in a grin as he slipped his fingers around hers. Charlotte chewed on her bottom lip as she followed him down the balcony and into a darkened room. As soon as she pulled the windowed door shut behind her, Yami pushed her against the glass and planted his mouth against hers. He gripped her hips tightly, pulling them toward his.

Charlotte ran her hands over his chest and tangled her fingers into his unruly hair.

"We can't take too long." She said breathlessly between kisses. He tugged at her clothing, skirts over pants and tightly bound stays over a white blouse. "People will miss us if we take too long."

Yami grunted as he unclasped her robe and then his own, letting them both fall to the floor.

"They might miss you, but no one will care where I've gone off to." He pulled her further into the room and hoisted her up onto a table top.

"That's not true. You're the man of the hour." She wrapped her long legs around his waist and pulled him against her. He grunted once more as his lips found hers in the darkness.

"Shame I can't see you in what you look best." He cupped her finally freed breasts in his hands before bringing one to his lips.

"Oh, and what's that?"

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing." He pushed her back against the table, his lips traveling over her skin before he stood and freed himself from the clothing which separated them. He pulled her up to him once more. She gasped as he entered her.

"You alright?"

She nodded, panting, but realized he couldn't see her in the darkness.

"Yeah. More than alright." She clawed at his shoulders as she moved in concert with him.

"I hate to do this fast." He kissed her again as he tried ignore the desire to slow down, to take his time, to savor her.

"Have to." She moved against him, holding tightly with one arm while stimulating herself further with her free hand. "Maybe we can take things slowly next year."

"Yeah."

"Oh, gods." She gasped and dug her fingers into his skin as she buried her head into his neck. Her body quivered against him as she felt the waves of release course through her. He groaned and his body softened as he let go, pushed to the edge by her climax and how her body tightened on his. As she lifted her head from his neck, he pressed his forehead into hers, moving by touch alone. He slid his hands up her back to her shoulders and kissed her softly. She leaned into him, embracing him as she nuzzled his neck once again, kissing his jaw, his ear.

He didn't want to let her go, and he clung to her like a lifeline. Every muscle in his body shook as if he had spent the entire day training and he could move no more. He didn't want to move anymore.

"I wish we could stay here." She whispered against his skin before looking up at where his face should be, but was obscured by the darkness. She brushed her fingers against his cheek, his lips.

"Me too." He brushed back the bangs which stuck to the beads of sweat on her forehead. "Maybe you should join my squad. We wouldn't have to worry then."

"Worry?"

"About what people think or what they would say."

"Are you worried?"

"No, but you are."

Charlotte sighed, knowing he was right. She hugged him again.

"Tempting, but Yami. Would you really want me there?"

He stroked her back.

"Of course. Then I'd never have to let you go."

Charlotte sucked in a quick breath.

"But do you want me as a subordinate or as an equal?"

"What?"

"If I was in your squad, I would be your subordinate. Is that what you want?" She looked up at him, trying to will enough light to see his eyes into existence. "Or do you want an equal?" Charlotte felt her body trembling once more, but desire had nothing to do with the cause.

Yami took a deep breath, considering the question. And then he took another.

"It was a stupid idea. Forget I asked." He leaned in to kiss her and Charlotte grinned against his lips. She met his kiss voraciously, tangling her fingers in his hair once again.

She wanted him again, as she had wanted him so many times over the year since they had last seen each other. But she knew she would be missed if she did not return soon. She would have no plausible explanation for her absence either.

Yami hummed against her lips and pulled her into him.

"Guess I did something right. Wish I could give you more, but you're getting that worried tense feeling again." He rubbed small circles down her back, making her shiver. "All your muscles are tight, but not in the good way."

He kissed her once more before letting her go and collecting his clothes. She hopped from the top of the table, reluctant to leave, but knowing they should. She dressed hurriedly.

"Maybe I should go back through the hallway? I don't want to raise suspicion."

Yami fastened his heavy leather belt around his waist, thankful for once he had listened to Julius' advice and left his sword at home. He sighed, realizing it wouldn't be home much longer.

"Did anyone see you go to the balcony?"

"I don't think so. I think it should be fine." She was lacing her bodice back over her shirt and trying to adjust how her breasts lay within it. She sucked in a breath as she tightened the fabric and the texture brushed her nipples. Her body, still sensitive and full of longing, rebelled against her rational mind in the only way it could. She grumbled about needing extra padding as he pulled her to him once more and kissed her.

"You aren't helping." She placed her hands against his chest and pushed him away playfully. Yami chuckled.

"Maybe I can see you again later?"

"Maybe, though next year is more likely. My Captain has already given me a list of things to do. And I'm sure you'll be busy yourself getting the new squad up and running."

Yami sighed in frustration.

"Yeah." He kissed her once more. "Another time then? Maybe before a year?"

"Maybe. Now, I need to go." She pulled against his embrace, but only because she forced herself to do so. Her body and her heart screamed to stay put.

He let her go, reluctantly, his fingers brushing down her arms as she pulled away. He watched as she stumbled through the darkness to the door. He flinched as the light from the hallway spilled into the room and her silhouette disappeared through the luminous portal. He stretched his shoulders and rolled his head, loosening his neck before he picked up the robe he had dropped near the window. The silky fabric was soft and cool as he slipped it over his shoulders once more, but he hated how constrictive it was. He felt like it pinned his arms to his sides. He wasn't sure if it was just made too small--Julius had ordered the construction, but had not bothered with getting measurements, or if it was just poorly designed. Regardless, he knew he would have to do something about it before he had to fight while wearing it.

He hoped it would be a long time before then.

Yami looked back to the door Charlotte had disappeared through.

"An equal, huh?" He knew she was right. As much as he might want her to come to stay with him, to be with him, he suspected when push came to shove, he would pull rank on her. And as a member of his squad, she would always be subordinate to him. The thought made him uncomfortable the more he considered it.

As he turned to pull the window open for another much-needed cigarette, he noticed a flicker of gold on the ground where his robe had been. Picking it up, he recognized the golden rose brooch which had held her robe fastened around her shoulders. While it hadn't been necessary to secure the garment--they all have internal fasteners, he had never seen her without it. The design was slightly different from the squad's emblem, but still obviously the same flower. He cradled it gently in his hands as he stepped through to the balcony and reentered the party. Another cigarette would have to wait.

***

Charlotte crept through the door into the grand hall and looked around as she softly shut the door behind her. No one noticed her entrance. She straightened her shoulders and walked with all the confidence of her rank back to her comrades and sisters-in-arms. As she moved through the crowd, she worried as people looked at her that they would know what had happened. All the other times, her trysts with Yami had been exceedingly private affairs. While she had worried people would piece everything together then, she had at least had the benefit of distance. Now, she felt her actions were plainly evident on her face for everyone to see.

She tried to tell herself it was none of the business, none of their concern. She knew he would be nonplussed by the glances she felt everyone was giving her. She wished she could follow his example as she walked up to her friend Mira.

"Ugh, you smell like smoke." Mira's nose wrinkled as Charlotte slipped into the circle of discussion. Charlotte sniffed at her robe, but could barely make out the offending scent.

"Sorry?"

"Where did you go anyway?"

"Nowhere. Out on the balcony. I needed some fresh air." The lies rolled off of her tongue like water, she had gotten so used to telling them.

"Fresh? Right. I'm guessing someone was smoking out there."

"Yeah."

Charlotte withered a bit under Mira's stare.

"What?" Charlotte could feel a tremor in her voice.

"Nothing." Mira's skeptical gaze lingered for a moment before she returned to the topic of discussion at hand.

Charlotte tried to catch up, to follow what was being said, but her mind wandered back to Yami's mouth on her skin in the dark. She wished she had been able to run away with him like he had asked, at least for the night. She missed him already and wanted nothing more in the moment than to wake up in his arms. She smiled and nodded to something Mira said to one of the younger squad members, but her mind was not present in the discussion.

She felt him walk up to her before she saw him.

"Um, 'scuse me." His voice sent a shiver down her spine. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly as the conversation happening around her silenced. The gathered members of her squad all looked at him behind her with expressions which varied from desire to suspicion and disgust. Charlotte turned to meet his eyes and found it difficult to breath. She had gotten lost in those dark pools so many times before, but she could not afford to do so now.

"I found this outside. Does it belong to any of you?" The rose brooch seemed tiny in his large hands. He locked eyes with her for a moment before his gaze traveled down her body. His tongue darted out between his lips, wetting them as his eyes met hers once more. The world fell away as she got lost in his gaze, despite all her efforts to avoid doing so. Charlotte could see a desire unsated despite their earlier actions blazing in him. She swallowed hard as she reached for the brooch. Her fingers brushed over his palm and his hand twitched at the touch. She lingered a moment before grabbing the brooch and pulling away.

"Thank you. I'm not sure how it fell off." She knew her cheeks were burning bright red. The one corner of his lips twitched up briefly as he caught her in the lie.

"Just glad I could get it to the right person."

"How'd you know it was mine?" She wanted to kick herself for continuing the conversation, but she could not let him go. She wanted to drown in his eyes, his touch.

"It's a rose, so lucky guess."

Someone bumped her and the spell broke as her eyes were forced from his. And when she turned back to where he had been, he was gone. Charlotte looked through the crowd for him, only to see him heading back out to the balcony.

"He had quite the presence, doesn't he?" One of the younger squad members said, also watching him leave.

"I can't believe he was made a captain." Another said with disgust. She rolled her eyes. Charlotte shook her head in an effort to free her thoughts of him as she reattached the brooch. She said a silent prayer of thanks as she fastened the latch that it had not been broken in her earlier zeal to remove it.

"Yami Sukehiro, God of Destruction..." Mira said with an appreciative smirk. "He can destroy me anytime."

"Mira!" Charlotte's eyes widened and she felt the color return to her cheeks.

"What? I've never made my preferences a secret. Just because the rest of you like to pretend you don't appreciate a damn fine man, doesn't mean I have to."

Charlotte sputtered, but Mira continued.

"He looks like the type who would have absolutely no problem throwing you up against a wall and just..." She caught the various looks from the rest of the gathered squad members and trailed off with a grin. "But I guess none of you would know about that."

Charlotte had hoped her face was neutral as she looked at the other women's expressions which varied from intrigue to revulsion, but as Mira's expression changed as she reached Charlotte's eyes after scanning the group one by one. Mira opened her mouth to say something when Charlotte heard her name called. The Blue Rose Knights Captain--an older, stoic lady with a severe expression and salt and pepper hair worn swept back in a tight bun, gestured for her to approach. Mira frowned as Charlotte bounded away to answer the summons.

"Charlotte, Lord Julius wanted to speak with you."

"About what?" Charlotte's heart raced as the memories of her visit to the Aqua Deer base came back to her.

"To congratulate you once more perhaps?" The captain had few words, as usual. Charlotte nodded as she approached the dais. Lord Julius looked out over the gathered crowd, looking bored, yet his eyes searching for something. He gave her a soft, welcoming smile as she walked up the few steps to him alone.

"Charlotte."

"Lord Julius, you asked for me?"

"Yes, I wanted to congratulate you. Advancing to Vice Captain so young is not a feat many are capable of. You have done so well since you joined the Magic Knights. I know your parents were not too keen on the idea in the first place, and I don't know if they have come around, but I wanted to say how proud I am to have someone like you serving the kingdom."

"It is an honor to serve." She bowed her head, but his knowledge of her parents' opinions on the matter made her uneasy. "But excuse me, Lord Julius, how did you know my parents' thoughts on the matter?"

He gave her a small secretive smile.

"Lorna and I have talked about it. She has always been very concerned for you, but also very impressed by your grit and drive."

"I see." Charlotte's heart beat faster and the color blanched from her face. The thought of her captain and the new Wizard King discussing her brought so many questions to mind. Julius' expression softened as he watched her. He motioned for her to come closer. He leaned forward conspiratorially.

"Don't worry, though. We didn't talk about everything."

Charlotte could not stop the relieved sigh which escaped her lips.

"But speaking of which, how are you? Would you like a seat?"

Charlotte straightened and shook her head.

"I'm fine. I... I’m just fine."

"No problems? Nothing at all?"

"No. I mean, it's not normal, but it's not bad. Honestly, I don't even think about it. I forgot actually until you just mentioned it."

Julius nodded, his eyes calculating as he looked her over.

"I'm assuming that means you haven't told him yet."

Charlotte's heartbeat skipped, but she did her best to keep her face stoic and flat. She had failed so many times tonight alone, she was certain she had gotten it right this time. But she couldn't resist a quick glance to the balcony where she had last seen him go.

Julius' small smile gave nothing away.

"No. Like I said, it slipped my mind once I stopped worrying about it."

"I see." Julius sighed and glanced out to the same balcony. And in that moment, seeing his glance, Charlotte's heart stopped in dread. He knew. He had to know.

"You're not going to tell him, are you?"

"It is not my place to do so." Julius fixed her with a meaningful look.

Charlotte closed her eyes and swallowed hard. She released a shaky breath as she nodded.

"Right."

"No time like the present." Julius cracked a smile at the small joke. Charlotte nodded before taking her leave. As she walked down the few steps to the main floor, Mira caught her eye and motioned for her to come over. She could see questions and suspicions in the other woman's face, but she waved her off as she made her way to the balcony once more.  
She stood watching him lean on the railing and looking out over the city below from inside the door for a moment. He seemed lost in thought--a sharp contrast to his reputation as a brainless machine of destruction. A thin plume of smoke rose over his head. She pushed the door opened and stepped out into the cool night air. She fought tears as she stepped through to the balcony, and every fiber in her being screamed at her to stop. Her hands shook with fear and her mouth grew dry. She knew Lord Julius was right, that he had always been right. She should tell him; he deserves to know. But her fear had overwhelmed her.

She had meant to tell him after it had happened. She had started the letter so many times but each time she had tossed it aside as not being good enough, as not being able to express what she needed to say, as being too impersonal. She had decided then to tell him in person, but now, faced with doing so, she felt paralyzed by fear and trapped by what-ifs.

He turned to her as if he heard her step out onto the stone flooring. His eyebrow was cocked up, questioning, as if she was the last person he had expected to join him, but with a smile, as if he couldn't ask for a better companion in the moment.

"I thought you would be with your squad." He stubbed out his cigarette on the railing as he looked her over.

"I'm going to have so many questions to answer later, you know." Her hand went to the brooch at her neck.

"Really? I thought it was a good cover."

Charlotte sighed as she crossed the space to lean on the railing next to him. He turned, matching her posture.

"Not as good as you might think." She looked out over the city. Tell him, she told herself, only to feel resistance in her heart. He looked out over the city again in silence.

They stood there, quiet for a long moment. Charlotte shook like a bundle of nerves, unable to calm herself as she considered her task and the reason she came to see him in the first place. Yami stood serene next to her, the image of perfect calm.

"Yami."

"Hmm?"

"I... Nothing." She could not bring herself to say it. Not to him. Not now.

They stood next to each other in silence. Even after a few moments, after Yami had covered her hands with one of his, even after she had interlaced their fingers, they stood in silence, unable, or unwilling to say anything.

He pulled his hand away from her reluctantly and lit another cigarette. She clasped her hands in front of her and propped her chin against them as she looked out over the city.

"I..." She tried again. "I should go." She turned her back to him as she walked back into the grand hall. She could feel his eyes on her as she walked away and rejoined the crowd still gathered to celebrate the knights' accomplishments. A sick feeling grew in her belly, unlike anything she had ever felt before. She would try again, but not tonight. Tonight they both had too much on their minds and too much to do to prepare for the future. The safeguard which had been put in place would hold, she told herself, trying to convince herself she had all the time in the world to tell him.

***

He watched her leave, for the second time that night. He wanted to hold her, to squeeze her against him, to tell her... tell her what, exactly? He sucked down the cigarette, letting the hot, smoky air burn his mind clear. Clear of thoughts and feelings, clear of the memory of her. He had to focus. Julius had given him a task to do, and he had made a vow. He would never let Julius down. He finished the cigarette and flicked it’s still burning end over the railing. He stood looking out over the city once more, making his list of things to do. He glanced back to the party which seemed to be dwindling as time wore on. He saw her golden head through the crowd.

He had things to do, and as much as he might wish it, she was not one of them. Not now.


	6. Night Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is another short story disguised as a chapter. It doesn't all take place on one night, though all the important stuff does. And I am posting without a thorough grammar or continuity read-through. If something jumps out as jarring, please let me know so I can fix it.

The city was awash in light and sound at the entirety of it celebrated. The spring air was warm and filled with rich smells of cooking food and fireworks. Yami sat at a table, a warm cup of sake in his hand and his new squad-mates surrounding him. Gathering the individuals who were slowly becoming his family had taken much longer than he anticipated, but they were together now, even if others had scoffed at his decisions. The young spatial mage who couldn't attack and the silent, intense curse master had been recruited from the exam--recruits no one else had taken a second glance at, but something about both of them had felt... right. Even Julius had looked at him questioningly when he had offered a place to the two young men. The changeling--as he called them-- he had found skulking around the capital. They had been going through so many forms in an effort to escape... something, they had drained their mana. Yami had never asked what it was they were running from, but he had offered them solace and sanctuary. The thread witch had been a random pick up shortly after. He hadn't intended to enter the Witch's Forest, yet he had bumbled his way inside, all the way to where she had been held captive. She had followed him ever since.

And now they all sat together at the festival, caught up in the atmosphere, and ignoring the disappointment of placing last in the star count. Yami tried to not let the position get him down. He knew he was at a disadvantage, to begin with. Besides, Julius had always told him to do things his way, to fight and to lead in the way he saw fit. And sometimes, his way was a little more destructive than one might expect.

He had not even bothered with joining the other captains on the stage, though he was nearby should he be required. He was close enough to see the knight who had been called out on stage as being outstanding examples of magic knights. He smiled as he saw Charlotte join her captain for the recognition, but she couldn't see him in the crowd. Or if she did, she made no move to recognize him.

He had hoped to see her, to spend some time with her. He had missed her these last few months. He wished he had been able to convince her to ditch the banquet on his birthday so they could spend the time with each other.   
Instead, the day after, he went off searching for a base of operations for the new squad and a few days after that picked up the pink-haired thread witch who wouldn't leave him alone.

Even now, she leaned on his arm, enjoying all the festival had to offer. She had been isolated from everyone for so long, Yami didn't blame her for overindulging in the food, drink, and environment. But he wished she would cling to someone else for a bit. 

He wanted to talk to Charlotte. She had seemed to try and tell him something the last time they had seen each other. Julius had alluded to a secret she had as well, but he couldn't get anything more out of the old man. And though the thought had not been pestering him, seeing her during the awards announcement had brought back to mind her uneasy posture as she looked out at the city from where she stood next to him on the balcony. 

But tonight, she seemed as cool and collected as he had ever seen her. Her public face was squarely affixed to her features and her bearing was no less than how he might expect a princess or a queen to carry themselves.

"Captain, you're not drinking with me..." Vanessa leaned heavily against him, her voice a slurred whine. 

Yami took a sip of the sake in his cup. Despite Vanessa pressing against him in a way which made her intentions extremely obvious, he couldn't shake Charlotte from his mind. He lit a cigarette and inhaled deeply before exhaling into the sky as he looked up at the fireworks bursting in the distance. Vanessa's fingers ran down his chest and his mind flew to Charlotte's blue eyes as she had done the same. The touch alone aroused him and he knew he would only have to look at Vanessa to have her jump at the chance. The sex would be hard and fast, quick and dirty, as it had been every time before. The sheltered witch had an appetite for experimentation and a fetish for letting him do whatever he wanted. 

But he wanted what he had in Charlotte's arms from a couple of years ago. He wanted the awkward, timid touches, the gentle kisses which drew into passionate desire. He wanted the give and take.

Vanessa's hand on his cheek turned his eyes to her. She planted her lips against his, pressed her ample chest against his as she straddled his lap. 

Traitor, he thought to himself as his body responded. His hands held tight to her hips as she rubbed against him.   
He gave in. In some ways, he was the epitome of self-control, but in others, like know, he barely knew his own mind. He tried to fill his thoughts with her blue eyes, blond hair, and soft skin, keeping her front and center in his thoughts, but his body could not withstand the onslaught of desire coursing through him. He told himself she would never know, or it wouldn't matter anyway. She had practically admitted to fooling around with some of her squad-mates. How was this any different?

Vanessa giggled and rubbed further against him as his hands crept up her back.

Fuck it, he thought, though a tiny nagging question poked at the back of his mind. Charlotte's voice quietly echoed. "A subordinate or an equal?"

***

Charlotte had noticed him standing in the crowd, even if no one else had. But she stood on the stage, looking out at the crowd trying to keep her face as serene as she could, trying to keep her heart from pounding out of her chest. She only glanced at him twice, and only after she and her accomplishments had been announced and the attention was no longer on her. He had turned away from the stage then, talking to another commoner turned Magic Knight—Jack, if she remembered correctly, or some other Praying Mantis member. They seemed to be posturing or challenging each other, and Charlotte rolled her eyes at the two men. She never quite understood how relationships worked among men, how one moment they could be at each other's' throats but in the next, they could be best friends. As she watched, the pair seemed to make the transformation from enemies to friends and then back to enemies. Charlotte bit her lip in confusion, but her attention was suddenly drawn away as her captain called out to her. 

The ceremony was over and she, along with her squad had been released to enjoy the rest of the festival. The captain was meeting with the Wizard King.

"Are you sure you don't want me there?" Charlotte asked, trying to hide the uncertainty of what to do with her freedom behind a mask of duty. 

"No, Charlotte. The matter is of no concern. Go, enjoy the festival with your sisters." The older woman nodded curtly before turning to the doorway at the rear of the stage and following the remaining captains. Charlotte glanced into the crowd for Yami, curious if he was also heading to the meeting, but she could not find him in among the crowd. 

"Come on, Lotte." Mira winked at her. "Let's go see what kind of trouble we can find." 

Charlotte rolled her eyes, knowing exactly the kind of trouble Mira meant. The shorter woman was out on the prowl for a companion. Charlotte knew she didn't much care if it was for the night or even for a few hours. Mira was one of the few in the sisterhood who was never satisfied with the companionship of the sisterhood itself. She was always looking for the new, next thing and as such, went through lovers like they were water. Charlotte didn't understand the appeal, even though Mira had always told her she should give it a try sometime.

She could only think of one person she wanted to spend time with, especially in that way. Charlotte blushed as the thought of Yami pushing her against the window at the advancement ceremony a few months prior sprang into her head. Mira glanced at her once more and cocked her eyebrow, questioning the reddened cheeks on the blond woman. 

After scouring the crowd fruitlessly for a conquest, Mira suggested they all share a drink. As they entered the bar, she had not expected to find him there. She didn't notice him at first, though she did recognize the black and gold robes of his ragtag squad clustered around one table. It wasn't until the pink head moved out of the way that she saw him, lipstick smeared over his face, his eyes closed as the woman on his lap sucked at his neck. He ran his hand through her wavy hair, gripping it in his fist as he gasped. 

Charlotte stood watching, her heart pounding in her chest and every fiber of her being crying out in agony or anger, she couldn't tell which, or perhaps it was both. 

"Charlotte, come on," Mira called out, but her voice was drowned out in the roar of blood which filled her ears. His eyes flew open and he looked straight at her. The color drained from his face and even from across the room, she could see his expression change from one of ecstasy to regret. 

Charlotte spun on her heel and stormed out of the room. She did not bother to glance back at him as the door swung shut.

***

The air had turned cold early, reminding Charlotte of the early winter a few years ago, when she had nearly drowned while on a mission. Yami had saved her then, jumping into a raging, freezing river after her. It had been the second such year when he had rescued her. She had been grateful and had done things she now regretted.

Or so she told herself. She wanted to regret spending the night with him, sharing her body with him. She wanted to regret giving herself to him, mind, body, and soul. After the last Star Festival, she knew he had not given himself to her so fully. She shouldn't have been surprised, she thought, chastising herself for her naivety. Her friends, even though they did not know the extent of their relationship, had warned her about men. Her captain had as well.

"All dogs," she muttered as she went through the town. The Blue Rose Knights had been dispatched to a large city in the common realm to deal with some bandits. The group had been ravaging the area for weeks before the Magic Knights were called in, taking all of food and valuables in a village. In each town, at least one or two young women also went missing. Some of them turned up a couple of days later, having been abused and raped at the hands of their captors, but others were still unaccounted for. A year ago, she would have found it difficult to group Yami in with such a group of deplorable miscreants, but after seeing him at the festival, his hands all over that other woman--a member of his squad no less!--she painted all men with the same stroke. She fumed as she saw two of the bandits harassing a young girl on the cusp of womanhood. The girl stood defiant against them, though even at the distance, Charlotte could sense the fear in her. She might have been young, but she was not as innocent as Charlotte had been at the same age. She knew what was going to happen to her if she could not resist the men. Charlotte knew as well as she used her thorny briars to send the men flying. She sighed as the young girl collapsed in gratitude. The girl said something about wanting to be like her, but Charlotte could only think of how much of a fool Charlotte was for falling in love with someone like Yami Sukehiro, for letting him into her life and heart for carrying his child. 

The rest of the squad was moving on and Charlotte needed to keep up, no matter how much she might have wanted to help the girl. But the girl looked up at her with strong, defiant eyes, and Charlotte knew she would be alright. Perhaps in a few years time, she might even see the girl again. Charlotte would be happy to welcome one with such inner strength into the squad. 

She hadn't thought about the child sleeping within her in months, maybe even a year, but for some reason, seeing the girl standing against those men who wanted to hurt her had brought the memory back. Guilt wracked her body, though she worked hard to hold everything together. She could not show weakness in front of the squad. They looked to her for guidance, for strength. As vice-captain, she had a responsibility to embody everything for which the Blue Rose Knights stood. She could not let them see her doubt.

But even as they traveled back to the base camp from which they had been tracking the bandits, she felt little fractures cracking her from within. Questions formed in her mind, hounding her over her decisions. Why she had felt the need to keep the child within her, Why she had asked to meet him, and why she had followed him back to the noodle shop in the first place. 

She hated the answer.

She loved him. 

And she hated herself for it. She hated the child she bore, she hated herself for being taken in by his charms, not that there were many, and she hated her weakness. 

She didn't hate him, though. And she didn't blame him. She couldn't. He was, after all, only a man. He couldn't be held responsible for his actions, not all of them, not when she had been an equal participant. Such was the attitude she had been instilled with since she had joined the Blue Rose Knights. Men were irresponsible and often not in control of their actions. As such, women had to be the more rational of the pair... should a woman chose to pair with a man. 

But Yami had never seemed so irresponsible before. He had never seemed so heartless.

Charlotte wiped away a tear which had strayed from where she fought to keep them contained. 

No, Yami had never seemed like the stereotype she had thrust onto her when she joined the squad. He might have been the only one who had proven himself different from the others, but he had always seemed different, responsible.

And now she hated herself more as she tried to rationalize his responsibility away, as she tried to take it fully onto herself.

No, she thought. She would not let herself make him the victim of another woman's charms. He was responsible for himself. He had been given the responsibility for others by the only other man she respected in the world, and she would not let him escape that charge. 

He might not love her the same way she loved him, but she would not take his actions, his failings upon herself. The child she carried was created together. He would bear responsibility for it, one way or another.

If only she could bring herself to tell him.

After he had been promoted to Captain, she had tried. She had tried to tell him in person; she had tried to write. But in each case, she had failed to find the words. Now, two years later, stewing in anger over his betrayal, she needed to tell him, she needed to know what he thought and what he wanted. 

She nearly overshot the base camp as she tried working the letter out in her head. She made her way to her tent without speaking to any of her sisters in arms, where she sat at a small desk to write.

But the right words would not come. 

She was in the middle of draft three when Mira poked her head into the tent and spoke without preface. 

"You got a letter." 

Charlotte scribbled out what she had written before looking up at her friend. 

"What?"

"You got a letter." Mira walked into the tent, repeating herself. She held a creamy colored envelope between two fingers. 

Charlotte crumpled up the piece of parchment she had been writing on and tossed it to the ground. She picked up the pen from her inkwell and let the dark blue fluid drain from its tip a moment before putting it to the paper once more.

"From the Captain?"

Mira tossed the envelop, seal side up, onto the table. The plain black circle stood out against the envelope like a candle in a dark room. Charlotte's stomach flipped and she felt as if she was going to throw up. She bit her lip as she looked at the letter.

"Unless the Captain has taken to using black sealing wax, no." Mira pulled up a stool and leaned on the narrow desk. Her eyes stared out, hard and firm, from her face, which was set in a determined expression. Charlotte took a deep breath as she looked from the envelope to her friend and back to the envelope once more.

"This isn't the first time you've gotten such a letter, Lotte."

"I've asked you so many times to not call me that." Charlotte's voice was exasperated, both with the timing of the letter and the insistence of her friend.

"And you've also told me that we would talk about what is going on after your last birthday. And then it became after the mission, then the Star Festival..." Mira placed a hand over Charlotte's. 

"It's nothing."

"Don't tell me that. Lotte, something has been up with you for a while. Sure it's not all the time or even most of the time, but it seems like every time you get a letter like that, something with you goes crazy."

Charlotte sighed and looked down at the letter once again. 

"It's a bit of a long story," Charlotte said as she picked up the letter. Mira had been suspicious for years. Charlotte had never had the intention of telling anyone, but the more she tried to hold the secret in, the more it screamed to be let out. 

"Should I get some wine?" 

Charlotte turned the letter over in her hands. She nodded silently as she stared at the seal. She waited for the tent flap to stop swinging in Mira's wake before she cracked open the wax. Her hands shook as she unfolded the letter.

***

Yami stalked the house which served as the Black Bulls base in growing agitation. Everyone stayed clear of him for the last couple of days as his frustration mounted. He, unfortunately, had no idea why he was getting so angry. 

Not until he looked at the calendar.

His birthday was in a week. 

"God, I hate birthdays," he muttered under his breath as he stormed off to his room, hoping no one had heard him or if they had that they would not try to do anything stupid, like plan a party. 

A party was the last thing he wanted. But he struggled with finding a voice for what he did want. He wasn't horny, not exactly. Vanessa had seen to that. The young witch had an appetite with which Yami had a difficult time keeping up sometimes. Yami had never thought himself old before, but with her, he could feel every ache and pain, every battle scar. He admitted she needed a younger man, or perhaps one with less mileage, but she never had a problem satisfying his needs. 

He thought about calling for her, to let her touch ease this... whatever it was making him so irritable. 

But the mere thought of her now made him even more irritable. 

He wanted something more, something Vanessa had never been able to give him.

He closed his eyes only to find a pair of sky blue eyes conjured in his mind. Sky blue eyes which could be hard or soft, depending on her mood, and a rare smile she gave to no other man except him, part laugh, part eye roll. He called her face from memory, feeling himself stir in a way he had not in nearly a year. Sure, Vanessa had been able to satiate his physical desires, but she had never been able to reach deep into his soul.

"Dammit." He rolled over onto his side, groaning as he sat up. He pulled himself to a small table in the room and struggled to write her a letter.

He knew he had messed up. He knew she had seen him with Vanessa a few months prior, and he had seen the anger in her face. He didn't understand why she had been so angry. He still didn't. 

They had never talked about the relationship they wanted. In fact, Charlotte had seemed adamant they have no relationship of any sort. She never acknowledged him aside from their shared birthdays, and so it never crossed his mind she might want something more.

So the look in her eyes as they met across the tavern had simultaneously struck his heart and confused the hell out of him. And still, she made no move to rectify the situation or to take matters into her hands. Instead, she left.   
Yami wondered if she even knew what she wanted.

His mind whirling with thoughts, Yami put ink to paper. Regardless of what had happened, he could not imagine spending his birthday without her. He tried to think of what to say, to ask, but his mind drew a blank. Should he explain what had happened? Should he apologize? For what? They weren't a couple, so he did nothing wrong, not that he could see anyway. 

He settled for simple and straight to the point. A single question. A yes or no answer. Anything else which needed to be said could be said in person or not at all.

***

The letter was short, simple, and did not mince words. Even how it was crafted reminded Charlotte so much of Yami.

"Do you want to meet again?" She read once, twice, three times—the last one out loud. Mira entered the opening of the tent with a flagon of wine and two wooden cups.

"Who's meeting who again?" She asked as she placed the cups on the table. Charlotte was blushing as she looked up. Mira poured the wine without further question. Charlotte took the cup between both hands and inhaled the sharp scent before taking a small sip. She knew her limit was very low compared to her friend, and the story would have no need for drunken embellishment. Charlotte looked at the letter once more. He had not even bothered to sign it.

Charlotte took a deep breath and slid the paper over to her friend. Mira looked at the unsigned note and then back to Charlotte.

"Yami Sukehiro. He, um, wants to meet with me." Charlotte wanted to add on something about it being strictly business, but she knew Mira would see through the lie. "Again."

Mira looked more closely at the note.

"Wow, he has really nice handwriting. I would never have imagined..."

"I know it's impressively neat, but that's not what we were talking about." Charlotte took another small sip of wine.

"Right, I'm sorry. He wants to meet with you. Again. When did you last meet with each other?"

"We, well, we've been getting together for our birthdays since, um, since he broke the curse."

"Getting together. Like, getting together?" Mira emphasized her point with a mildly obscene gesture. "Charlotte, I'm so proud of you." She put her hand to her chest in shock. "Wait, how long?"

"Since he broke the curse."

"You were like eighteen. That was six years ago! How the hell did you keep a relationship like this from me for this long?" Mira's face was a mixture of excitement and disbelief.

"It wasn't exactly a relationship. And it wasn't exactly on purpose for three of those years."

Mira crossed her arms over her chest.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the first year it was a spur of the moment sort of thing. I sort of offered to buy him lunch to replace the one my magic spilled, and..."

"And you ended up sleeping with him?"

Charlotte looked down into the red cup of wine. She swirled the liquid in the wooden cup. 

"You did." Mira prodded for confirmation

"Yes." Charlotte sighed and took another sip. "The next year I almost died... again. And he saved me... again."

"And you slept with him... again," Mira concluded. Charlotte nodded, feeling her cheeks flush as red as the wine. Mira rubbed a hand over her face. Charlotte glanced at her as she tried to control the smile that kept finding its way to her lips. "And the following year?"

"The war."

"Oh that's right, we were in the trenches for your birthday, weren't we." 

"Yeah." 

"So how did you sleep with him then? It's not like you were able to sneak off."

"We were positioned next to his squad. It wasn't that difficult." Charlotte took another sip.

"I can't believe you."

"What?"

"Nothing, I just... I can't believe this has been going on for all this time, right under our noses and none of us even considered it possible."

Charlotte looked up at her friend. 

"Really? You never guessed?"

"Maybe after last year, but before then? Not at all."

Charlotte chuckled and took another sip.

"So what happened the next year? After the war ended?"

Charlotte blushed. The wine made her head swim and she smiled.

"I, um, I asked him out."

Mira blinked at her in complete silence.

"What?" Charlotte asked.

"You... You asked him out."

"I missed him, and I... I didn't want to leave anything to chance."

"You're in love with him."

"I am not."

"Oh, honey, you are. I could tell something was up, seeing you together at the banquet last year." Mira placed her hand over Charlotte's and gave her a sympathetic look. "The energy between you two was crazy intense. Now I know why."

Charlotte rolled her eyes. Mira picked up the new letter and held it in front of Charlotte's face.

"So, when are you going to meet him?"

"I'm not." Charlotte drained her cup and stood. She stumbled the few steps to the narrow cot she called a bed while in the field. She sat down heavily on it. She took off her boots and laid down, staring at the ceiling. The sides of the small bed's frame pressed against her, reminding her of the first time with him, in a cot similar to the one she lay in now. Charlotte groaned.

"And why not?"

"He doesn't feel the same way."

Mira looked at the letter in her hand and then back to her friend. 

"Are you sure?"

"I... I saw him with someone else." Charlotte turned over onto her side, away from Mira. Silence hung between them for a moment as Mira studied the letter once more. Collecting the cups and the still half-full flagon, Mira stood and walked to the tent opening. She turned back to Charlotte.

"You can decide whatever you want, Lotte, but you should at least write him back and tell him that. But the fact he even bothered to ask, well, I think it says something about how he feels."

Charlotte released a shaky breath as tears flowed over her face. She wanted to stop, but she could not control them. She felt she could not control anything, that her heart betrayed her. She wanted to see him again, she wanted to be with him as she had on her birthday for so many years now. Thinking about it felt right. But she knew what would happen if she did, and she was not sure she could give herself to him while he gave himself to another.

***

His birthday had come, and Yami had not gotten a response from Charlotte. His agitation and frustration turned to concern. He did not care if she had said no, even though he really wanted to see her. He wanted to fuck her, sure, but he would have been happy with only her touch. Vanessa's touch, while nice, wasn't the same; it didn't soothe him the same way, didn't give him the same sense of peace. 

But having no response at all worried him. 

He ordered Finral to send him to the Blue Rose Knights headquarters. He could say he was on official business if asked, but fortunately, no one bothered asking, not among his own squad anyway. When he got to his destination, a short dark-haired spitfire of a woman greeted him. He had seen her before somewhere, but he couldn't place her exactly. 

She seemed to know why he was there, however. 

"She's not here." She said as she approached the gate. Yami was taken aback by the directness of the exchange. "She went home for her birthday."

"Who's not here?" He could not imagine anyone guessing the true reason why he had come to pay the squad a visit. He realized Charlotte must have told someone, or perhaps the woman had weaseled it out of her. Looking at the frankness in the short woman's eyes, he could believe she had manipulated the truth out of Charlotte.

"Charlotte. She's why you're here, isn't she? She never wrote you back, huh?"

Yami took out a cigarette, lit it, and took a deep drag in an effort to slow down his mind. Not only did Charlotte tell this woman, but she also knows about the letter?

"No. She didn't." Yami narrowed his eyes at her as she waved the cloud of smoke away from her face.

"Disgusting. Anyway, I believe you know where she lives. If you want to go see her. Just, um, don't do anything stupid." The woman turned sharply and walked back inside the building, leaving Yami staring at the wooden door for a long moment as he finished his cigarette. He crushed the dying embers beneath his toe before he turned back to the road where Finral stood waiting for him. The young man had been a bit too eager to make the trip to the nearly all-female squad, so for the sake of his ride home, Yami had ordered him to stay away from the building. His attention had still been drawn in by some of the younger members working in the garden. He was chatting them up when Yami approached. 

"Let's go." 

Finral jumped and spun around.

"Sure Boss, where to?"

"Home."

Yami stalked through the common room of his home base with a dark cloud over his head. He knew she had gotten the letter, and she had chosen to ignore it. He thought he was angry. He certainly wanted to put his fist through the wall, but he was more hurt she had not responded than anything. He satisfied himself with slamming the door shut. He landed heavily on his bed and stared at the ceiling. 

"What did she mean, 'don't do anything stupid'?" he muttered to himself. Would it be stupid of him to go see her anyway, even though she had made it clear she didn't want to see him? Or would it be stupid of him to stay away? He grabbed the pillow on his bed and covered his face with it. He screamed at his indecision. The outburst cleared his path. He hated how he would start thinking and end up thinking too much. Sometimes, he reminded himself, it is just easier to let things happen. He got up from the bed went for a walk. He walked through the shifting hallways of the base before deciding the changing landscape was still too stifling. He didn't have a destination in mind, so he did not bother to ask Finral to take him anywhere. Instead, he grabbed a broom and took to the air. 

The wind felt good on his face as he sped through the sky. He had no goal, only the speed pushing him forward. He didn't really care where he ended up, but he was curious to see where the currents would take him. The sky grayed in the distance as storm clouds rolled across the land. He flew toward the thunderhead. As he approached the wind whipped up, tossing his squad robe and hair among the currents of air. The violence of it reminded him of another time he had traveled through a storm, only that time he was much younger and much more afraid. As he continued to push deeper into the darkness of the storm cloud, lightning flickered along either side of him. He decided to find refuge, to take shelter. He brought the broom downward, landing among the cobblestone streets of a town he had not noticed because of the storm. 

But on the ground, the buildings seemed familiar. 

He sighed as he looked around and then shielded his head the best he could as the rain began to fall. The water pelted him in large droplets as he covered his eyes with one hand and gripped the broomstick with the other. He looked around quickly, spotting a familiar looking worn sign and fabric covered entrance.

"Of course," he muttered to himself as he sprinted toward the small shop face. He ducked beneath the awning and through the curtain at the entrance. The smells emanating from the shop made his stomach grumble. He looked over at the bar and he caught the eye of the old man behind the counter. The man looked at him and grunted before turning his back to the bar and focusing on preparing a dish for another patron.

Yami stood his broom in the corner, took a seat at the bar, and waited.

The old man placed a bottle of sake before him as a younger man served the patron down the bar. Yami watched the pair, obviously father and son, moving in concert. Eventually, the young man asked Yami for his order.

"I know what he wants." The old man stood at the stove preparing a dish. He glanced back at his son and then to Yami. "Same thing as last time?"

"Uh, sure." Yami lifted the small cup to his lips and let the warm liquid coat his insides. 

"Where's your girlfriend?"

"What girlfriend?"

"Lady Roselei, though I seem to remember she hates being called that."

Yami scoffed and chuckled.  
"I wouldn't say she's my girlfriend." He downed the remainder of the sake in the cup and began pouring another. 

"Does... Does she say that? I mean, Is that what she wants?"

The old man shrugged as he turned around to the pot behind him and stirred the food within. He ladled out a large serving of soup from within the pot. Noodles hung on either side of the cup, teasing at the contents of the pot. He poured the steaming liquid into a heavy ceramic bowl before placing it before Yami.

"I can't speak to the mind of the young lady. All I can say is the two of you seemed rather close last time you were both here together."

Yami took a sip of the rich broth and then stirred the soup to mix up the bits of meat and vegetables which had settled on the bottom. 

"Two years ago."

"Aye. Something happen since then?"

Yami shrugged. 

"Just been busy, I guess." He continued to eat, his attention focused solely on the bowl in front of him.

"She came in earlier. Picking up something for her grandmother." 

Yami froze with his hand halfway between the bowl and his mouth. 

She was here, in town. Of course, she was, hadn't the other woman said so? 

He slurped the soup off of the spoon.

"I see." His voice was even, almost flat, but he felt as if he was almost unable to hold on to the spoon in his grasp. He forced himself to continue eating despite the urge to run to her house. 

The old man watched him for a moment before giving a small shrug and turning back to the food cooking on the stove behind the counter.

***

"Charlotte, dear, you shouldn't be stuck at home on your birthday." A frail old woman looked up at Charlotte from a mass of pillows and blankets. "I will be fine for a while alone."

"Grandmother, the doctor said you need to be supervised between treatments. Since Mother and Father had pressing business elsewhere, such supervision falls to me."

"Are you this serious with your squad?" The old woman's blue eyes sparkled with laughter before a coughing fit wracked her body. She shook and shuddered with each expulsion of air and Charlotte felt a panic rising from her gut. 

"Grandma!" She sat next to the old woman, wrapping her arms around the thrashing shoulders and rubbing the narrow, bony back through the dark silk gown she wore. A gnarled, almost skeletal hand waved in protest as the fit subsided.

"I'm fine, Charly. A little cold like this isn't enough to bring me down."

"Still, Grandma, you have to take care of yourself." Charlotte shifted her position on the bed as she placed her hands in her lap. "Are you ready to eat something? I got one of your favorites."

"Don't tell me it's Maurice's chicken soup again. You father has been trying to force that swill down my throat since I first fell ill." 

Charlotte chuckled as she stood and retrieved a small thermos from the table across the large room.

"No, it's not Maurice's, and I promise I won't tell him you said that about his cooking."

"That's my good girl."

"But it is soup." Charlotte opened the tightly sealed lid and waved the container beneath her grandmother's nose. 

"Oh, is that?" She took another deep whiff of the soup in the clay cup. "From that little place near the center of town? The hole in the wall down the alley near the bakery? What is the name of that place?"

"Yes, it is."

"Your grandfather and I used to go there all the time when it was new. Ricardo there always made the best homemade noodles. Your grandfather offered him a job in the household, but he refused. Said his place was in the restaurant. How do you know about it?" She looked up at her granddaughter with suspicion as she took the vessel between her thin hands.

"I, um, I stumbled upon it one day, years ago. The owner said he knew you. That you had given him a loan? Or something." Charlotte placed a tray over her grandmother's lap. She took the thermos from the shriveled hands and poured the soup into a bowl. The broth was rich and brown and was peppered with chunks of meat and slivers of vegetables. Pale white noodles floated in the dark broth, shivering with the vibration of being placed before the old woman once more. Charlotte handed her grandmother a spoon.

"Must have been years ago. You haven't been home for quite some time." The old woman took a sip of the broth from the spoon. Charlotte blushed at the comment. She had stayed away typically, not even returning home for holidays, choosing to stay with her squad instead. Except for that one time, but Charlotte bit her lip at the memory and did not tell her grandmother about it.

"Yeah, it was after the incident actually." Charlotte and her family never talked about what happened on her eighteenth birthday. Her father had taken to calling it 'the incident' to avoid discussion of it. The phrase had caught on, but Charlotte saw the grimace on her grandmother's face as she said it. 

"You mean the curse." She slurped a big spoonful of soup.

"Ah, yes." Charlotte blushed more deeply. She was still reluctant to talk about what had happened that day, about how the curse had triggered and she hadn't been strong enough to stop it. "After it was all over, I, um, stumbled upon the restaurant."

Her grandmother looked at her. Charlotte could tell from her still crystalline sharp eyes that the old woman suspected the story was more complicated than Charlotte had described. The old woman took another spoonful of soup. 

"No matter, the soup is simply fantastic." 

Charlotte sighed.

"Good. I'm glad you like it."

"Though it is a shame. You stuck here with an old lady for your birthday."

"It's fine, Grandma." Charlotte smiled as she placed her arm gently around her grandmother's shoulders. "You know I've never liked it when Mother would make a big deal of it. Spending it with you sounds pretty great."

"You bless an old woman, but you are a liar, my dear." Another slurp punctuated the statement. Charlotte felt her back straighten. "Don't forget, Charly, I was a royal interrogator back in my youth."

Charlotte slipped from the bed and paced the room a bit. 

"Who is he?"

"What?"

"The one who broke the curse. I know you've never told your father, but the curse was broken. It was broken in the only way possible. So, who is he? Or is it who was he?"

Charlotte sighed and opened her mouth to talk when a knock sounded on the door.

"I hate to be a bother, young mistress, but there is someone looking for you." An older gentleman, old enough to be her father anyway, poked his head around the heavy wooden door.

Charlotte looked at the servant whom she had known since childhood and then to her grandmother who had a small sly smirk on her face. 

"You should probably go see who that is. But I expect you to answer my questions, Charly."

Charlotte sighed before walking down to the foyer. She saw him from the balcony and cursed under her breath. 

"James didn't have to let him in." 

His attention was focused on a small statue which sat on a table near the door. She watched as he rotated it, looking at it from all sides. He didn't seem to know she was there, but she also knew his senses were far more keenly honed than most peoples. 

"What do you want, Yami?" 

He jumped slightly. Had he been so engrossed in his study of the statue he had not noticed her approach?

"Charlotte." He said breathlessly. The way he looked at her led her to believe he had more he wanted to say. Could he not find the words? He reached out for her, but she recoiled. He looked away with a huffing sigh. "I don't understand."

"I don't know how you don't. I would figure no response was pretty clear." Charlotte's voice held an edge to it which made his eyes widen. She crossed her arms over her chest feeling anger bubbling in within her she had not noticed before. No, it had been there, she only hadn't realized how deeply it had run.

"I get that, but I don't get why." The confusion in his voice rose to match her anger.

"Who is she?"

His face screwed up in misunderstanding.

"At the festival. Who is she?" Charlotte clarified before asking again.

"Vanessa? She's a member of my squad."

"You certainly seemed on quite friendly terms for her to simply be a member of your squad."

His eyebrows knit together in confusion before his face relaxed as realization dawned on him.

"What happened to 'wanting an equal'?" Her voice softened to a whisper. 

"Charlotte." He reached out for her again, but she recoiled once more.

"No."

He stared at her, his face a stoic mask. His dark eyes were unfathomable, and she could feel a flurry of emotions roiling beneath the seemingly calm surface. He nodded once before he turned and walked out the door without another word.

As the heavy slab of wood slammed shut, Charlotte felt something inside her crack. Tears streamed from her eyes and she sobbed as she collapsed to the marble floor beneath her. Her grandmother's slender, bony hand lay gently on her shoulder, but the old woman did not ask a single question as she wrapped her arm around Charlotte's shoulders and let her cry into her shoulder.

***

The 'No' echoed through his mind emphatically. She had meant it with the entirety of her being, and Yami still had no good understanding of why. She had mentioned Vanessa, but she had not given him time to explain. 

Not that she would have listened anyway.

He stalked through the town back to the restaurant. It was really the only place in town he knew where he could get a good drink. And all he wanted to do right now was to drown the sound of her voice from his mind. 

The owner cocked an eyebrow as Yami stormed into the establishment. His intimidating aura—a feat which was so useful on the battlefield--made all eyes in the place turn to him as he entered. He didn't care who saw. He only needed to get spectacularly drunk.

He hated drinking alone though. 

The owner slid a glass of clear liquid which smelled of turpentine across the bar to him. 

"I'm guessing you're not here to eat."

Yami drank it in one shot.

"Nope."

The owner poured another and left the bottle as he moved on to other customers.

Yami took the second cup in one shot and poured himself a third. 

Gods, drinking alone sucks. He thought about going home. He knew he would always be able to find a drinking partner at the base. Vanessa would always be up for it, so would Finral, though the spatial mage would usually pass out long before he would even feel the buzz he had right now. The guy gave him some good shit. Yami sipped the third cup.

He was on his fourth when the owner came back to him. 

"So, what happened?" 

"Don't wanna talk about it." Yami drained the cup and poured a fifth. "She's mad. I dunno. She didn't say why."

Yami thought he heard the old man laugh.

"Didn't she?" The old man went about his business of cleaning up the bar. 

Yami took another drink. She had indeed told him, but he didn't know if he believed it. Sure, he and Vanessa had a dalliance or two, or maybe three, but he didn't know why that would matter to Charlotte.

"Maybe you should go talk to her again?" the old man said from down the bar. The restaurant's patrons had started to trickle out as the evening wore on.

"Now why the hell would I want to do that?" Yami rubbed his forehead as he looked up from his glass to the old man. The world was a blur and the image took a moment to settle into his mind. The liquor had hit him far more suddenly than he had expected. 

"Or maybe not." 

Yami glanced to the door, feeling his vision take a moment to catch up to the movement. He thought he felt her ki enter the restaurant, but the fabric panels which covered the doorway hung still. 

Maybe going back to her house was a good idea? Maybe he could figure out what was going on in her mind if he did.

Yami sighed and finished the last of the liquor in his cup. He picked up the bottle only to find it was empty. He scoffed at the empty bottle in his hand before putting it down. He lit a cigarette and took one long drag and then another before standing up from the stool. 

"I'm leaving." He tossed a coin on the counter—a gold piece, though he knew the cost of the bottle was far less than its value. He stumbled out of the bar and into the darkness. Retrieving the broom he had ridden in on, scoffing at it as he took it in hand, Yami set his sights for home. He wondered if Vanessa was still conscious or if she had drunk herself into a stupor yet. He could use a buddy with whom he could drown his sorrows, and maybe an outlet for the pent-up frustration he felt.

***

"That was him?" The old woman's voice was soft, gentle, but firm in her reading of the situation. Even though she had asked, Charlotte felt the question carried the feeling of a statement.

She nodded.

"Yeah." Charlotte wiped the tears from her eyes. The tears were filled with anger and confusion, and she hated they had fallen when all she wanted to do was scream and yell and break things. Instead, she got tears of rage, and tears of loneliness.

"What happened at the festival?"

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" Charlotte tried changing the subject. She did not want to talk about how Yami Sukehiro had somehow managed to grip her heart so tightly, and how seeing him had torn her asunder.

"I will be fine. Tell me what happened. I can find out if I want to, but I would rather you tell me."

Charlotte sighed, her shoulders slumped as she admitted to herself she would not be able to win a fight of wills against her grandmother. Besides, she realized as she felt the tears falling again, she wanted nothing more in the world to talk to someone about how she felt and what she needed to do. 

Charlotte opened her mouth and the story she had kept in for so long fell from her lips for the second time in as many days. To her grandmother's credit, she had sat silently as Charlotte had talked. Once the story was over, the old woman looked at her granddaughter for a moment. Her lips were pressed into a thin line as she considered her words carefully.

"Charly, you love him."

Charlotte started to protest.

"Don't even try it. You love him. I know you do. And just as importantly, you want him." The old woman's eyes had a glimmer which made Charlotte blush. "Why are you denying yourself? He wants you too."

"But, if we're going to be... together," Charlotte tried to tip-toe her way around the subject at hand.

"You mean if you're going to get physical? Have sex? Bump uglies?"

"Grandma!" Charlotte's face turned crimson.

"Oh, get over yourself. No need to be prudish for my sake. Besides, I've heard far worse in my day."

The flush on her face only deepened and Charlotte sighed. 

"Yes, I want him. But how can we be together if he's going to go off with another woman and... mess around." she censored herself still. "I mean, at the festival, she was all over him."

"I see." Her grandmother nodded sagely as the pieces fell into place. "You're jealous."

"I am not jealous." Charlotte protested emphatically. She was the vice-captain of the blue rose knights. She was nearly a captain herself. She couldn't be jealous of a too familiar pink haired floozy. Charlotte felt her bile rise and her breath quicken at the thought of them kissing, of him looking at her with the small smile she had thought he had reserved for her.

"You are. And I think it's because you expected things, you assumed things. How often do you see him?"

"I don't know. We run into each other for work sometimes, but..."

"I mean in a personal way."

Charlotte shrugged. She had not intended to have such an in-depth conversation with her grandmother about her personal life. 

"I..."

"Listen, Charlotte. I want you to be happy. I want you to find the love that is so lacking in this world, a love that you deserve. It is all I have ever wanted for your mother. It is all I have ever wanted for you." She squeezed Charlotte's shoulder. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But you should at least be honest with yourself." She leveraged herself upright. "Now, help an old woman back to bed."

Charlotte sighed and stood up. She took her grandmother's arm and guided her back up the stairs. 

"You know, I hope I am as spry when I reach your age."

"You have to get to my age first, Charly."

"Any tips to help with that, Grandma?"

"A healthy sex life." The old woman said cackling. "But seriously, Charlotte. Aside from that young man who just stormed out of here, are you allowing yourself some of life's more physical pleasures?"

"The brigade has an amazing chef and one of the best vineyards in the kingdom, though I don't like wine too much."

"I see. But what about companionship?"

"I have some good friends there. We take care of each other."

"But not like that young man takes care of you, hmm?"

Charlotte blushed.

"Grandma, really? I mean, yeah, sometimes, but..." Charlotte hurried her grandmother through the door to her room. "I don't know, it's not quite the same, I guess."

"Do you love your friends?"

"Of course. They are like family."

"I mean, are you in love with any of them?" The old woman sat on the bed and looked at her granddaughter.

"I... No, I guess not. We sometimes ease each other's burdens, but..."

"Desire should never be a burden, Charlotte." She laid back in the bed and covered herself with the thick blanket. "You should go talk to him." 

The old woman turned over and covered herself to her chin leaving Charlotte standing, watching, thinking. As the soft sounds of her snoring filled the silence of the room, Charlotte considered her grandmother's words. She turned on her heel and strode from the room with a great purpose driving her steps.

***

The night sky was growing cloudy as Charlotte reached the restaurant where she and Yami seemed to share so many moments. An old man she recognized as the owner was fastening a lock over the wooden paneling which covered the entrance. She stood on the corner watching him, her face falling in disappointment as she realized he was closing up. He jumped as he turned toward her.

"Young Miss, I didn't expect you to be there. You will put an old man in his grave if you're not careful."

"I, um, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you, but..." 

The old man leaned closer to her and nodded. 

"Oh, it's you. If you're looking for that guy, he left, Young Lady Roselei."

Charlotte grimaced at the title but did not let it dissuade her. 

"When? Do you know where he went?"

The old man shrugged.

"Maybe a half hour ago? Not sure on the last bit."

Charlotte released a huff of air. Her instincts had been right, but she was too late. 

"Thanks anyway." She turned back down the street plotting her next move.

"Wherever you decide to go, you better get there soon. A bad storm's coming." The old man called after her before she disappeared around a corner. 

Charlotte looked up at the sky at the dark clouds blotting out the starlight. A bright patch marked the location of the nearly full moon. Its light was diffused by the billowy clouds which blew in front of it. The wind was growing more fierce as well as it tossed her braid against her face.

"I should go home. This is not weather to be out in. Besides, the Black Bulls base is quite a distance." She looked at the sky in the direction of the new squad's headquarters. The clouds were black on black, like a layer of velvet obscuring the stars. "I would be crazy to go there now." She tried to turn her mind back to her grandmother sleeping alone, supposedly still ill, in the manor house with nothing but staff to comfort her. She started walking toward the large building which dominated the landscape, but with each step, her chest hurt more and more. 

He had gone home, she knew it. She turned back to the velvet covered sky only to see flashes of lightning brighten it momentarily. She sighed and her grimoire flew to her aide. The book's pages fluttered and the power flowing through it cast an eerie blue glow to the ground around her. Thorned vines erupted from the earth and formed themselves into a sort of chair, lifting her up into the air. She urged the vines forward into the darkness, carrying her into the stormy night.

***

The sky had opened up just as Yami landed outside the base. He hurried through the heavy door into an empty common room. Shaking water droplets from his unruly hair, he unclasped the shoulder pauldron he had taken to wearing instead of a squad robe and tossed it on a chair to dry. The room was as silent as a tomb and reminded him of the first time he had stepped foot into the haphazard building. It had been falling apart then, but now, as he filled it with the typical liveliness of the squad, it had begun to repair itself. He wondered if Henry was doing alright with as empty and quiet as the house was now. 

And he wondered where everyone could have gone. 

A dreadful thought crossed his mind. He hoped it wasn't true and the small squad had gone out on their own. The last thing he wanted right now was a birthday party and a surprise party was doubly on his list of things he couldn't deal with at the moment. While his head had stopped spinning and his vision seemed normal enough, he could feel a sluggishness in his body as the alcohol continued to dull his senses. He tried to read the ki of the room and felt nothing, though he knew it could as easily be due to his drunkenness as it could be because the house was empty. 

He collapsed on the ratty, threadbare couch and leaned his head back. He closed his eyes and wished for sleep. The thunder pounding outside and the steady pitter-patter of the rain against the windows only heightened the drowsiness he felt from the alcohol. Eventually, the noises lulled him to sleep.

A different sort of pounding startled him awake. Yami looked around the room disoriented for a moment as the rapping at the door continued. His body moved stiffly as he stood. After a moment, he realized the noise could not be one of his own squad—they would have barged into the room without hesitation. 

"Who the hell?" He muttered, shuffling to the door. He yanked the door open, ready to berate whoever had disturbed him, but he could only blink when he saw who was on the other side.

Charlotte stood facing him, drenched to the bone as the rain poured around her. She shivered in the darkness, her teeth chattering. Her features were obscured by his shadow as the light from the room poured around him.   
Lightning struck nearby followed by a large clap of thunder which made her jump in surprise. Her hair had come loose in the wind and as she turned toward the noise, golden strands stuck to her face.

Yami licked his lips as he looked her over. What was she doing here? Hadn't she made things perfectly clear earlier?   
Another clap of thunder brought him back to reality and he pulled her into the safety of the building. 

"What are you doing here?" He hoped he sounded intelligible. She tried to answer, but he couldn't make out her response over the chattering of her teeth. 

"Never mind. Let's get you warmed up. We can, we can talk later." 

He took her hand and started leading her to the bath, but she jerked her hand away. She looked at him and crossed her arms over her chest, rubbing her arms as she tried to get warm. 

"Fine, freeze if you want. I was going to bring you to the bath, but..."

The look on her face shifted from the disorientation to relief. She motioned for him to lead on.

"Come on." He waved at her to follow him. She followed him in silence, which reminded him of their birthday several years prior. The situation was not so dire this time around, but Yami had a feeling the stakes were just as high. They rounded a corner and stepped into a large chamber filled with a rectangular tub. The hot, spring-fed water filled the room with steam. Charlotte looked at him, waiting. Her teeth had stopped chattering, he noted as he walked past her and stuck his hand in the tub. The water was perfect and he had a sudden desire for a bath himself, though the steam made him feel a little light-headed. He looked over at the high narrow windows in the stone wall behind the pool.

"Well, are you going to let me bathe or not?" 

He met her eyes, and let out a long slow breath. So many words sat on the tip of his tongue, so many things wanted to get out, but he didn't quite know how to say them.

"I'll get you a towel and something dry to wear." 

He brushed past her, too close perhaps for the amount of space in the room. A year ago, he would have kissed her. A year ago, they might have bathed together. He wondered again why she had come. He questioned what she had gained from coming all this way. His mind was full of questions and few answers as he scrounged for a shirt she might be able to wear. Nothing he had seemed at all appropriate, or like something she would wear even reluctantly. He found the one shirt he had kept for formal occasions. Julius had insisted on it when he was younger, but now it had gotten pushed to the back of a cabinet, hidden, forgotten. 

"At least it has sleeves." He muttered as he grabbed it and a towel from the closet in the hallway. He stood outside the wooden door closing the bathroom off from the rest of the building. He knocked once, then twice, hoping she would be able to hear him. Her voice granting him entrance was muffled through the heavy wood. 

Her golden head poked out of the water and the ends of her hair billowed along the surface like some living thing. She was submerged up to her chin as she watched him walk across the front of the pool like tub to set down the bundle in his arms. He hung the towel on a hook and laid the shirt on the shelf above.

Her own clothes lay in a heap on the floor, soaked through and through as he picked them up. 

"I'll go lay these out to dry." 

She watched him intently, but he refused to look at her. 

"Yami." She called out to him. He looked at the wet clothes in his arms, but he had frozen to the spot.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

He turned and nodded. She leaned on the edge of the tub. Her arms were crossed on the ledge and her head lay on top of them. 

"Why did you come, Charlotte? I know you saw the storm rolling in; you knew how dangerous it was going to be." He squatted next to the tub, meeting her at eye-level.

She looked at the ground.

"I don't know. I... I guess my grandmother talked me into it."

Yami sat cross-legged on the floor and placed the wet bundle in his lap.

"Your grandmother?"

Charlotte rolled her eyes.

"Sounds stupid now, but yeah. She has always been big on honesty and... I just can't seem to be honest when it comes to you."

Yami stared at her in silence, feeling his heart race. He willed for her to continue, but she stared at the ground next to him. 

"I... what do you mean?"

"I, I can't just let myself... want you as I do. But I can't deny that either." 

She chewed on her bottom lip and Yami wanted nothing more than to kiss her.

"You made it perfectly clear earlier that you didn't want me."

Her eyes met his and he saw her cheeks redden. He doubted the color was a result of the heat. 

"I... I don't know why I did that. But, I mean, I do." She sighed and scratched the bridge of her nose. "I... Why were you with her?"

Yami furrowed his brow as he thought back. 

"Vanessa? She's in my squad."

"You were kissing her." The color darkened on Charlotte's cheeks. Yami sighed.

"She was kissing me."

"You were enjoying it."

"Yeah. She's a good kisser."

Charlotte lowered herself further into the water, but her eyes never left him.

"What? Did you want me to jump to your side when you walked in?"

She tilted her head so she could speak.

"So you knew I was there."

"Charlotte, I always know when you're near."

The thought must have shocked her as her eyes widened. She leaned against the edge of the tub again.

"Is that what you expected of me?" He asked.

"I... I don't know. I guess I thought..." She shook her head.

"Charlotte, whenever we see each other, I never quite know what to expect from you. Every time is like the flip of a coin; will I see your softness or will I get the thorns? And every time we run into each other in public, you are so distant, even if you aren't outright dismissive. So why would I drop everything and come to your side?"

She shook her head again. 

He wanted to reach out for her, to cup her face, to comfort her even as he was stirring up the pain. Instead, he rubbed his hand over his face.

"I guess you don't want me as I thought." Her voice was tiny, sad.

And he couldn't believe his ears. How could she believe he didn't want her? After all the birthdays shared? After all the nights he had turned to others to forget the absence of her touch? 

He kissed her.

He kissed her to show her just how much he wanted her. He kissed her to let her know how wrong she was. He kissed her because he was tired of talking, tired of beating around the bush. 

She kissed him back, answering his desire with a longing of her own. 

And then his head was underwater.

When he came up and wiped his eyes clear, she was giggling and smiling. He pushed the hair back from his face and smoothed it against his scalp before pulling her to him and kissing her again. Her body fit against his like the beams in the house—dovetailed together for a strong bond. He sighed against her lips as he caressed her skin, convinced her touch was all he had been missing.

"I want you, Charlotte. Sometimes I want you so badly it hurts. Don't you dare think otherwise."

She started to protest, but he kissed her again, softly, quickly.

"I would be with you and you alone if you asked. Is that what you want?"

He pressed his forehead against hers. He could feel her stiffen slightly as she gasped. The question had shocked her.

"But if I am going to be yours, I need you to be mine too." He added before she could respond.

"What do you mean?" She pulled away just enough to be able to see his eyes.

"I mean, no more skulking in the dark, no more hiding, no more secret meetings. No worrying about your reputation. And sure as hell no waiting until our birthdays to see each other."

Her mouth hung opened as she processed his request. Her emotions warred on her face, but Yami watched hoping she would choose him. 

But her eyes drifted from his.

"I." She took a deep breath. "I don't know."

His heart fractured slightly. He wanted to push her away, to storm out of the room, to let his anger win out. He had offered so much, but she couldn't see past her pride?

But when she met his eyes again, the tears which filled them cooled his ire.

"Well, we can go on with the status quo."

He brushed her hair from her cheek where it had stuck and tucked it behind her ear.

"And the offer stands, you know. Just... it's not fair if you bind me to you, only to string me along a year at a time."

She sniffed and took a deep breath as she reasserted control over her emotions.

"No, I guess not."

He stroked her cheek. She leaned into his touch before pressing herself against him for a moment.

"Sorry." She muttered into his chest.

"For what?"

"For pulling you in."

Yami chuckled.

"Yeah, well, now my boots are soaked." He stepped away from her. "I should probably go change." 

She nodded and let him go. 

A few minutes later, she stepped into the doorway as he pulled another shirt over his head. Her hair was wrapped up in the towel and his shirt hung loosely on her; the collar slid down over her shoulder. She had a wet bundle of something in her arms.

"You forgot these." Her eyes lingered on his broad shoulders and chest before making their way to his face. He took the clothes from her arms and began laying them out over whatever surfaces he could find.

"Sorry."

"Guess I won't be going home tonight."

"Even if your clothes were dry, you'd be soaked again by the time you go there."

"It's still raining?" Thunder cracked nearby as if to answer the question. A creaking sound echoed after it. 

Yami turned back to the door, only Charlotte was gone. He looked around the room and found her sitting on his bed, her legs tucked beneath her. She looked out the small window at the flashes of lightning as she rubbed the towel over her hair.

"We've got plenty of room if you want to stay." 

Her blue eyes were like oceans as she turned toward him. Her hair, darkened from the water, looked like spun gold. The shirt she wore was only slightly paler than her skin, and he felt his eyes drift down her body as he took one step, then two toward her. 

"I don't think I have much choice in the matter." She licked her lips. "But whatever shall we do in the meantime?" The corner of her lips twitched up in an amused smile.

"I'm sure we'll think of something." He reached out for her, slipping his hand around her neck and pulling her onto her knees toward him. She kissed him, sucking lightly on his bottom lip before looking into his eyes once more. He held her gaze for a moment before pushing her back against the bed. He hovered over her, propped up on his elbow before kissing her. 

"Maybe I shouldn't have bothered getting dressed?"

"Probably not." She pulled him back into her.

***

Charlotte woke a few hours later, sore but elated. She turned over and curled herself around Yami's sleeping form. She interlaced their fingers as she pillowed her head on his meaty shoulder and slipped her knee on top of his thigh. He groaned slightly but did not stir as she settled next to him smiling. 

She could get used to this, to have him next to her. 

Her smile faded as she drifted back to sleep. Her mind played loops of imagined memories of everything she thought people would say if their relationship got out. 

Hell, not even a relationship, she told herself. She was not sure if she should even call him a friend. 

She didn't want him as a friend. 

But neither could she allow herself to have him for anything else.

She sighed and allowed herself to relish the moment, to commit it to memory so it may serve her for the coming year. 

"Status quo," she whispered as a reminder to herself. Keeping things as they were seemed to be the only way she could see forward. She would have him, as she had tonight, but she would also not stand in his way. Neither, she assumed, would he stand in hers. 

***  
Morning came more quickly than he was ready. Yami grunted as the sunlight filtering through the dirty window hit his face and made him squint. He tried to roll over, but instead, he rolled into someone. For just a moment, as his eyes were adjusting to the light, he thought it was Vanessa laying next to him. Only Vanessa had never stayed with him before. 

And the woman's hair was golden, not pink.

And the night had rushed back to him.

Yami brushed Charlotte's hair back from her face before kissing her on the cheek. The movement woke her and she turned smiling up at him.

"Good morning." He slipped his arm beneath her and squeezed her against him. He could get used to this, just as he could get used to her smile. 

"Morning." Charlotte yawned and stretched her arms above her head. She pressed her hands into the wall behind them. The motion revealed her exquisite nakedness, and he ran his hand over her breasts and down her belly.

Yeah, he could get used to this.

She giggled as the muscled in her abdomen rippled with the touch.

"Stop that." She brought her hands back toward them, encircling his neck and pulling him into a soft kiss. 

"What if I don't want to?"

"Not your choice." She kissed him again as he mock-pouted. "Besides, I need to go." She pushed him off of her and onto his back.

"Right." 

He watched as she slipped out of bed and got dressed. He didn't bother to move from where he lay sprawled except to lift his head. Once she was fully clothed, she squatted next to the bed. She brushed his cheek and ran her fingers through his hair. She might not admit it to herself, but he could see the regret on her face.

"Next year?"

"Sooner if you want."

The smile she gave him was sad and did not reach her eyes. He knew from the look on her face she would never ask sooner, but he could also see how part of her wanted to. She stood without another word and left. Yami rolled back onto his back and stared up at the plaster ceiling. He felt more relaxed than he had in a long time and sated in a way no one and nothing else had ever been able to do. He wanted her to stay with him, to wake up next to him every day possible, but she had made it clear she didn't want the same. 

"Well, at least we both know where we stand."


	7. Night Seven

Another birthday approached and Charlotte had felt her own longing for companionship growing stronger.

Who was she kidding? It wasn't companionship she wanted; what she wanted was something she would not give voice too. 

But she wanted it.

She craved it.

And that craving was growing worse.

She sat at the table in the mess hall after the mission. The room was nearly empty, with only those who had followed her as they defended the border towns taking their supper. The younger women clustered together. Charlotte smiled as she remembered a time she would have joined them. But now she chose to sit alone. Her mind was elsewhere and where it had gone, she did not want anyone else to follow.

She wanted to see him. If she were honest with herself, she wanted to see him now, but she would not allow it. 

“Status quo,” She whispered before taking a bite of food. She resolved to write to him later when she was alone and away from prying eyes—not that the other women were doing much prying. He had told her last year he would be up for seeing her more frequently. She thought often of his proposal, wondering what it would be like, how she would feel if she had accepted it has she been able to meet his terms. 

"Love shouldn't be treated like a hostage negotiation," she muttered to herself as she took another bite before the realization of what she had said dawned on her. She hadn't wanted to accept his proposal and give in to his desire to meet more often in part, yes, because she feared what others would say and how they would react. But something more unsettled her. 

Shouldn't love be given freely? Without strings attached? 

She growled deep in her throat before attacking her meal once more.

She loved him. Of this, she had no doubt. She wanted him. But she was afraid of so many things.

Charlotte began planning what she would write to him in a letter. Would she ask him to meet her? Would she insist on maintaining the status quo?

A flurry of questions swirled in her mind, but they would have to wait. She shoved a small morsel of meat into her mouth when she heard someone clear their throat. She looked up to see a slight young man standing at the table. He cleared his throat once more before speaking in a timid voice.

"Excuse me, Vice-Captain?"

He seemed nervous, but then most of the male squad members rarely broke rank to speak to her. 

"Yes?" Her voice was all business and held none of the wistful longings she felt.

"Uh, the Captain would like to see you in her office." His voice grew more confident with the simplicity of his task. "After you finish eating, of course." 

She knew he had added the last bit himself. Their captain was a woman of punctuality and strict adherence to the rules. If she had summoned Charlotte, she had meant for her to walk into the room mere seconds after she had made the summons. She never allowed for something as simple as finishing another task. 

Charlotte stood and drained her cup of water. She left the remainder of her dinner sitting on the lonely plate and hurried to the Captain's office.

Roana Declan sat at her desk her mind focused on a small pile of papers before her. She did not look up when Charlotte entered, but she did not need to do so to know Charlotte had entered the room. 

"Sit." the order came firmly and Charlotte answered without question. 

Charlotte waiting a long moment for her captain to finish her task and turn her attention to the woman she had summoned. When their eyes met, Charlotte had to force herself not to flinch. Roana's eyes were cloudy but had once been a greenish-brown which reminded Charlotte of a moss-covered tree. Her hair was now more gray than brown, though some darker streaks wove through the tight bun she wore. Her hawkish face, however, had not once lost the sharpness it had in all the time Charlotte had known her. 

"You have probably figured out why I summoned you." Roana never asked for anyone to simply visit. She always had a reason for everything she did. The squad had often speculated on whether or not the captain had a life outside of the squad or if she had anyone she considered a friend. As far as Charlotte knew, she was married to the job, and she certainly did not consider those serving under her as friends.

Charlotte blinked, her mind racing. Her attention had been so divided as she hurried to comply with the summons, she had not thought about why she was being summoned. She opened her mouth to apologize, but Roana cut her off.

"I am getting old, Charlotte. I can barely see anymore, and my magic is growing weak."

"You are far from old, Captain." Charlotte started to protest.

"Flattery is a waste of breath."

Charlotte shut her mouth and nodded. She had heard the phrase so many times since she had joined the knights, she could say it in her sleep. She had even uttered it to some of the new recruits who had tried to flatter themselves into her good graces. And she often told it to the men who would try to sing of her beauty in an effort to court her. 

"I am old, Charlotte. And I am tired." Roana's voice was softer than Charlotte had ever heard it before. "I plan to retire at the next advancement ceremony. I have already spoken to Julius about this, and we both agreed." The softness was gone. Roana folded her hands on the desktop as she looked at Charlotte and nodded. The corner of her thin lips turned upward just a touch, but not enough for Charlotte to call it a smile.

"You are to lead the squad after me."

"What?" The response was automatic. Charlotte blinked. The news did not surprise her, not really. She knew since her last promotion she would be considered when the Captain died or retired, but hearing the words made everything a little more real. 

"The squad needs some young blood, I think.  Someone with fire in them." Roana said. "And you have both the strength and resolve of a leader, Charlotte."

"I, thank you, captain. I will do my best to uphold the values you have taught me and to keep the squad strong."

"I know you will. Now, the ceremony will be in a week. We will need to work through the details of  the transition before then."

"A week? Is that enough time?" Charlotte asked her mind whirring. She started ticking off her list of things in her mind. Thoughts of Yami slipped her mind as she focused on the things which needed to be done.

***

The day before the ceremony, Charlotte arrived in the capital with Roana and several others from the Blue Rose Knights squad. She expected to be busy the whole day and well into the night with preparations, but Roana dismissed her as soon as the sunset. 

"Your birthday is soon, and with your new responsibilities, you may not be able to enjoy it as you wish. So, go, take this night and have fun. Socialize. Meet the other captains, or anyone else if you wish. You never know when you will have the chance again." The old woman gave Charlotte the first genuine smile she had ever seen on Roana's face. She nodded as her captain turned into the building and continued to watch as she spoke to the Wizard King and the doors to the building closed shut before her. 

Charlotte sighed. She wracked her brain and tried to figure out what she should do when her stomach grumbled. The sound reminded her she had not eaten since they had left the squad headquarters in the morning, and now the sun was setting. She spun on her heel and strode from the courtyard and out of the walled gate which separated the Magic Knight headquarters from the rest of the capital. She wandered the nearby streets looking for a place to eat when one particular wooden door seemed to call to her. 

The door itself was a light-colored wood set into a stone building with nothing special or eye-catching about it. In fact, the door looked eerily similar to most of the other doors she had passed. The sign hanging above the door was worn and difficult to read in the dying light, and the lanterns outside it had not yet been ignited. Still, upon closer inspection, Charlotte could make out the symbols for food and drink on the sign, though it was in desperate need of a fresh coat of paint. But the unlit lanterns were a clear indication the tavern was not open for business.  

Charlotte took a few steps, her eyes searching the street in disappointment. She could see no other business still open either, and none of the more well-kept signs offered what she sought. 

Her stomach grumbled once more and she turned back up the street toward the dark tavern. The lights flanking the door were still not shining brightly, but she could see a faint glimmer of light within them as if someone had lit them, but they lacked sufficient fuel. Charlotte pushed the door open and stepped through into the darkness. 

The room was smokey and dimly lit. Faint music filled the air coupled with raucous laughter from a table in the corner. A large bar occupied much of the center of the room and several patrons were seated there while others were scattered among tables closer to the walls. 

Charlotte took a deep breath and stepped further into the space, crossing the rough wood floor quickly toward the bar. The laughter from the back corner drew her attention once more, but the people seated there were obscured by the dimness of the lighting. 

"What can I get you?" An older gentleman asked her from behind the bar as he dried a glass with a rag. 

"Uh," The laughter caught her attention once more. she glanced over again, squinting her eyes in a futile effort to see better. "I don't suppose you have any food. I'm not much of a drinker, but I did miss lunch." 

The man behind the bar reminded her somewhat of the old owner of the noodle shop where she had met Yami all those years ago, except he smiled more and had an overall more pleasant demeanor. 

"Of course. Anything, in particular, you would like?" He rattled off a list of items which could be made quickly and would serve as a good sink for the alcohol he also served. Everything sounded dense and heavy with grease to Charlotte, who would have preferred something lighter and cooler on a hot sultry late summer evening. She made her choice after asking him to list the menu once more opting for the stew despite the heat.

"And something to drink?"

"Just water please."

His smile wavered ever so slightly.

"Of course." 

Charlotte looked around the bar and scanned the tables while she waited for her food. Nearly all of the people in the establishment wore the robes of a magic knight. She saw every squad represented, including her own as she recognized a pair of young women huddled together at one corner table. The only squads she did not see immediately were the two newest squads--the Golden Dawn and the Black Bulls. The absence of the Golden Dawn was not surprising; Charlotte imagined they had too much going on to take a break in a place like this. Besides, the few times she had to work with members of the Golden Dawn, she found them to be insular individuals who seemed more comfortable keeping to themselves or others of their squad. She was not certain what William Vangence was doing to make them all so close-knit, but given the squad's dramatic rise through the ranks since its inception, Charlotte thought he must be doing something right.

The absence of any of the Black Bulls, however, surprised her. The entire squad seemed far more lackadaisical than anyone would imagine a Magic Knight squad could be. Yami's own apparent disdain for the job seemed to have infected the entire bunch. They too had their reputation, though unlike the Golden Dawn, one tended to steer clear of them.  
The laughter from the corner resonated in the stone room once more and broke Charlotte from her contemplation of the patrons. Something about the voices she could hear but could not make out seemed familiar and that familiarity bugged her because she could not quite puzzle out why that was.

She squinted into the dark corner, trying to piece together who was hiding in the shadows when a tall figure stepped out from them. His long red hair seemed almost auburn in the dim light of the room. His crimson robe swished behind him as he crossed the room toward the bar. An uncharacteristic smile lit his features as he waved down the bartender. She watched as the two men spoke briefly and then as the bartender nodded before coming her way and setting a glass and bowl of stew before her. 

"Thank you." She closed her eyes and inhaled the flavor of the dish. Her stomach grumbled in response and she took a small bite, letting the textures and tastes play on her tongue before swallowing.

"Well, well, if it isn't Charlotte Roselei, Vice-Captain of the Blue Rose Knights. Though rumor has it you won't be Vice-Captain much longer." 

When Charlotte turned and looked at him, Fuegoleon Vermillion wore a wide smile which danced in his eyes and a crimson flush on his cheeks which matched his robe. She had never seen him drunk before, but the extremely informal lean of him on the bar top as he spoke led her to assume he was in an impaired state. The Crimson Lion Kings captain had a reputation for being a strict, straight-laced, hard-nosed man, a reputation which Charlotte had confirmed as validly earned on the times they had interacted before now. She had never imagined a drunken version of him as being so friendly and relaxed.

"Hello Fuegoleon." She took another bite of her stew.

"I never imagined you for a drinker, Charlotte."

"Nor I, you."

He picked up her glass and sniffed at it. He leaned closer to her, almost uncomfortably close, though she did not believe he held her any ill will. 

"What'chu got here?"

"Water." She took the glass from his hands and placed it back on the table, her patience wearing thin.

"What's taking so long, you hard-headed, fire for brains?" Another familiar voice called out from the darkness. A silvery mop of hair poking out of the dark corner, Charlotte came to the realization that no Silva should ever get a drunk as Nozel appeared now. The paleness of his hair and eyes clashed with the scarlet of his face. 

"What are you doing back there?" Charlotte watched as Nozel's head disappeared into the darkness once more, almost like it had vanished behind a curtain. She looked around at the other corners of the room, which while dim, did not have the same sort of opacity to the darkness as the one Fuegoleon and Nozel had occupied. She searched the mana of those present, feeling the nuances and fluctuations, the ebb and flow of the magical energy. The corner was dense with the stuff in high concentration and in high quality. 

"Oh, we're just hanging out, playing cards. So rarely do we get a chance to let loose and complain about work with others who actually know what we're talking about. Besides, Yami challenged us to a drinking game. How could we say no?"

Charlotte closed her eyes. Fuegoleon had confirmed her feelings. Yami was there. She glanced back at the enshrouded corner. Probing it with her mana, she felt his magic coalescing and taking shape to hide them from prying eyes. 

"You should join us!" Fuegoleon clapped her on the back, not hard enough to knock her out of the stool, but hard enough for her to lurch forward. "You'll be a captain yourself soon enough."

"I'm not getting involved in a drinking game." She looked back at the corner as the darkness faded and she saw Nozel, Jack, and Yami all sitting and laughing together. 

"Hey, Mister Ball-o-Pride, if the Hard-Nose can't get the next round maybe you should do it instead." Yami's voice carried through the bar. She heard Nozel complain in response but the sounds were indistinct.

The bartender placed a tray of drinks in front of Fuegoleon. He picked it up and turned back to the table.

"Well, if you change your mind, just come on over."

Charlotte turned back to her dinner, but she kept glancing over at the quartet in the corner. They were all laughing and having fun in a way she had never thought possible given how they usually acted toward each other. She tried to focus on her dinner, but Fuegoleon's words nagged her. Would she find it difficult to maintain her friendships within the squad once she was their superior? She found the thought of not being able to confide in Mira to be sickening. The woman had been her best friend for years and had been a trusted confidant. Mira was one of a very small number who knew how she felt about Yami.

Charlotte glanced at the group once again, watching without looking like she was watching.

She felt her heartbeat quicken as he smiled, his attention focused on the group. The longing she had felt creeping into her came rushing back as she watched him down the mug of ale in his hand.

She shook her head and looked back at the bowl of stew before her. 

"Are the rumors true?" The bartender asked, drying a glass. Charlotte took a bite of stew and then looked at him questioningly. "About the Antique Rose retiring?"

Charlotte nodded as she swallowed. The shift in power was happening in less than a day now, she found no need to keep it secret any longer. The bartender put the glass down with a wistful smile and picked up another one. The smile persisted as he wiped the water droplets from the clear surface. 

"I wonder if she will lighten up now." His voice was soft and hard to hear over the multitude of other conversations in the room, specifically one rowdy discussion which seemed bordering on a violent outbreak in the corner. The bartender looked over his shoulder at the group of captains and then back to Charlotte unconcerned. "They always get like this."

"Do they come here often? Together I mean?"

"Not as much as I would like. They pretty much clean me out for the night and I can take the next day off while waiting for supplies." He gave her a sly grin. "But they do, every so often. Sometimes it's all of them, sometimes just one or two. Sometimes the Wizard King himself joins them."

"I find it hard to imagine Lord Julius allowing such debauchery in his midst." She finished eating the chunks out of the stew and the bartender placed a large chunk of crusty bread before her. She tore off a small bit and dipped it into the broth.

"Julius knows when people need to let off steam." 

Charlotte blinked at the informal reference to the Wizard King. She knew he was well-liked among the common folk and often associated with them far more intimately than most nobles. Still, the informality shocked her.

"Is that what they are doing?"

"In a manner of speaking. They wouldn't be like this if Yami wasn't with them though." 

Charlotte dipped another piece of bread into the stew and chewed on it thoughtfully. 

"He pisses them all off equally. I think he does it on purpose too, to keep them from going after each other. Especially the two royals."

Charlotte smiled, not surprised by the assessment. 

"You should go sit with them. They will be your cohort soon enough, won't they? Best to get to know them as well as you can." The bartender put the glass in his hands down as an alarm sounded and he hurried to the other side of the bar.

Charlotte drained her water and gnawed on the bread as she watched them. At one point, Yami looked her way and caught her looking. She quickly turned her head and found something interesting in the grain of the bar top but she knew him well enough to think feigned disinterest would deter him if he made his mind up to seek her out. Part of her wanted him to come over, to talk to her, so she could feel the electric connection they shared. She felt it whenever they were together. She had even felt it on the battlefield as they worked side by side. She had most definitely felt it at the party when he had been promoted. 

And she could feel it now as he looked at her. She refused to look back at him, but despite her attempts to maintain her composure and her apparent disdain of him, she could feel his approach. She was thrilled by it.

"Hey Charlotte." Yami leaned against the bar, propping his elbows upon its surface and resting his back against the edge of the wooden top.

"Yami." She tried to keep her voice cool, flat, even as her heart raced. She fought the urge to touch him, to kiss him.

"You look kinda lonely out here."

"Being alone isn't the same as being lonely."

"True. I like being alone sometimes, but in a place like this, it's better to be with friends. Don't you think?" His head made a lazy roll to the side where he caught her eyes. She wanted to get lost in the dark pools of his soul. He seemed to be inviting her to join him, though she was not sure if the invitation was to the table or elsewhere. His mention of friends made her think of Mira once more and the conundrum she was facing over the future of that relationship. He looked back to the group he had left and then to her once more. He inclined his head toward the table quickly as if to say 'come on'. The corner of his lip twitched upward and his fingers brushed her arm. 

Charlotte felt her chest contract at the touch and she forced herself to take a deep breath, which she let out in a resigned sigh. He always seemed to be there telling her to look to others for support when she needed it, and she reasoned it would be better to have others to whom she could turn as well, others who knew what it meant to take the steps she was about to take. 

"Fine."

His arm slipped down between them and he took her hand in his. He squeezed her fingers briefly before letting her go and walking back to the table. She stood a moment, watching him go, wondering when the next time she would be able to see him alone would be before she followed.

"Well if it isn't the soon-to-be Captain of the Blue Rose Knights." Jack leaned forward on the table laughing with his unique laugh. "Want me to deal you in?" He tapped a deck of cards on the table as his long tongue ran over his lips in a way which she had always found just a bit disturbing. 

"Uh, no. Thanks. I'll just watch." Charlotte took a seat in a chair Yami had pulled up to the table before he slid into the booth.

"Have some wine at least." Nozel poured a glass and passed it to her. She looked at the dark liquid filling the cup and then back to the expectant faces. Fuegoleon and Nozel were clearly drunk. Jack seemed to slur his words more than normal, indicating he was also fairly inebriated. But Yami looked perfectly normal, except for how his eyes wandered over her as if they were alone. She forced a smile and wrapped her hand around the glass. Bringing it to her lips, she took the tiniest of sips, barely enough to taste. 

She felt a pressure against her knee and her eyes grew wide as a large, strong hand squeezed her leg. Her eyes darted to Yami's and narrowed in warning before the pressure disappeared. Charlotte felt a warmth growing in her cheeks and, from Yami's smile, she knew the warmth could be seen as well as felt. 

"Deal the cards, String Bean." Yami rapped on the tabletop and the glasses there shook slightly. 

"Okay, okay." Jack shuffled the deck of cards and tossed one in front of each of the men. "I wonder what uncreative nickname this idiot is going to give you now that you're joining us." He looked squarely at Charlotte. She shot a glance at Yami, now wondering the same. He knew her better than anyone at the table and with his experience, could get rather creative, and rather telling, with any nickname if he wanted. 

"I guess we will wait and see," Yami said as he examined his cards. As he contemplated his hand, Charlotte looked over the table. They were obviously gambling, as she saw coins scattered across the table. Nozel had managed to amass the largest pile of coins so far, while Jack seemed to have the smallest as he tossed in a copper coin into the center of the table. The other three men similarly put a coin in to the center, contributing to the initial stakes of play. Charlotte looked from face to face to face, at each man in turn and noticed a sudden gravity at the table as even the drunkest among them focused on the game. They signaled to each other with silent communication when one card was to be switched out for another or when the bet was raised. Charlotte tried to follow their motions but had no frame of reference for what each gesture meant. Their eyes darted around the table, each looking for some invisible tell as the bet increased. Yami slipped his hand beneath the table once more and brushed her leg. She looked at him and caught him looking at her out the corner of his eye. He glanced down at the wine in her hands as if to suggest she drink.  
   
Charlotte resisted the urge to bring the glass to her lips. The smell of the wine was strong, overpowering, and even the tiny sip she had taken earlier had started to skew her senses. She tightened her grip on the cup and he turned away, his mind back on the game. 

Jack called the round once Nozel started looking more smug than usual and all the cards were revealed. Charlotte was surprised when Fuegoleon's hand had bested Nozel's. Fuegoleon, to his credit, did little to boast. He only gave Nozel a satisfied smile as he pulled the pile of coins toward him. 

"Double or nothing," Jack demanded as he collected the cards from the table. "Charlotte can play this time." 

The shock she felt must have been plain to see on her face. 

"I don't even know how to play."

"Perfect, then I can break my losing streak." Jack countered.

"How about a different game? One without cards, and thinking." Nozel rubbed his eyes and then pressed his palms into the tabletop as he swayed slightly.

"How about Guess the Truth?" Jack suggested. 

"Guess the Truth?" Charlotte looked confused around the table. 

"It's where someone says something that is true and something that is a lie. If anyone else at the table guesses the truth, the person who said it drinks, but if they guess the lie, the whole table drinks instead." Fuegoleon explained.

"The whole table?"

"Well, everyone except the person who said the lie. And then you each take turns, saying one truth and one lie." Yami added, leaning towards her a bit, his eyes roaming over her once again. "Like this." He cleared his throat. "I was the leader of a gang before Julius picked me up, and I have never slept with a woman."

"You made that one too easy, you muscle-bound idiot."

"What's that you skinny stretched out jerk?"

"You heard me."

"It was supposed to be easy. It was an example, you moron." 

Despite the bickering and the mounting insults, Charlotte could sense no ill will between the two men. Nozel propped his chin on his fist and leaned heavily on the table. He drummed the surface with the other hand and rolled his eyes as Jack and Yami continued to argue. Fuegoleon clenched his fists in frustration before he polished off his glass of wine in one gulp and grabbed the bottle for a refill. 

"That sounds fine." Charlotte heard herself say quickly in an attempt to quell any fighting which might break out. Upon catching up with her words, her mind panicked at the thought of the game. She had no idea what had come over her or what she had gotten herself into.

Most of the questions and challenges had been tossed between the four men, much to Charlotte's relief. In the time they played the game, Charlotte had learned several interesting facts about all of her fellow, or soon to be fellow captains. For instance, Nozel had first started wearing his hair in a braid on a dare from his younger sister Nebra. He only kept it because he thought it made him look even more like the silver eagle for which his squad was named. And that Jack had two younger sisters for whom he would do anything, including torture and kill.

"Okay, Yami, give us two more, a little more complicated this time, if you please." Fuegoleon hiccuped.

Charlotte sipped at the wine which had been placed before her. She glanced at the foreigner over the rim of the cup.

"Hey, hey, Fuego," Nozel said, leaning onto the other royal. "We haven't heard anything from Charlotte yet."

Charlotte sputtered into the wine, blowing some of the red liquid into her nose. She put the cup down and wiped her face with the back of her hand.

"That's right." Fuegoleon looked over at her. 

Charlotte felt four pairs of eyes on her.

"Come on, Charlotte, how about it? One truth and one lie." Nozel leaned forward, his hands clasped and propped on the table before him, covering his mouth. From the look in his eyes, Charlotte thought he was laughing behind those clasped hands.

"Well, um..." Charlotte cleared her throat and crossed her arms over her chest. "Let's see... I can bake a mean batch of cookies, and I actually studied healing magic before realizing I was awful at it."

"That could be a tricky one. Let's see, what did a young Charlotte spend her time learning?" Nozel tapped his chin. Fuegoleon crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the bench, his face screwed up in thought. 

"If neither of you can decide, then I'll just jump in and say the healing magic is true." Jack waggled a finger at the two royals. 

"Now, just wait a second." Nozel countered. "You can't just pick one without considering all the possibilities." 

"Yes you can," Jack shot back. "It's a drinking game. The whole point is for everyone to end up gloriously wasted."

Fuegoleon snorted.

"He does have a point... bird brain." Fuegoleon looked over at Nozel next to him and cracked up laughing. Charlotte smiled and chuckled at seeing the two men so relaxed.

"No, the point is for everyone else to get wasted, and you seem to have already lost, you... fire... person." Nozel retorted, waggling his finger in Fuegoleon's face.

Charlotte looked over at Jack, who rolled his eyes, before catching Yami looking at her.

"Come on, guys, we all have to agree or she wins. And I say she bakes." Yami slapped the table. He looked over at her, a cigarette between his lips as they curled up in a vicious smile. His eyes drifted over her, landing on her breast. He licked his lips as he stared at her. 

Charlotte rolled her eyes and leaned on the table, resting her chin on her intertwined fingers as she watched the captains arguing. Eventually, they overruled Yami's suggestion and picked the truth.

"Fine, yes, I did study healing magic as a way to overcome the curse placed on me as a child. But I'm a terrible healer, which I learned very quickly." Charlotte admitted.

Jack, Nozel, and Fuegoleon cheered, slapping hands and bumping fists. 

"We won, now you have to drink." Fuegoleon reminded her. Charlotte looked at the glass of wine before her. She raised it to her lips and took a sip. 

"That's not a drink, Charlotte." Yami pointed out as he took a large gulp of his own ale. 

"Yami, if you keep drinking during the game, you're going to lose." Jack reminded him. Yami shrugged, his gaze turning back to Charlotte as she swallowed a larger sip and made a face.

Fuegoleon clapped her on the shoulder, laughing and smiling. Charlotte felt her head go a little woozy as she rocked under the force of his hand. 

"Alright, Yami. You would have made us all lose, so you're up. One truth, one lie." Jack prodded him with a long thin finger.

"You keep poking me, String Bean and you will lose a finger." Yami took another sip and stared off into space for a moment. A wicked grin spread over his lips and his cigarette nearly fell out of his mouth. He glanced at Charlotte in a way which made her squirm. "I got one. Alright, I am the youngest of seven children and I've slept with Charlotte here." 

Nozel nearly spat out the sip of wine he had just taken. 

"What?" Charlotte looked over at him with wide, disbelieving eyes and a bright red flush on her face. She could not believe he had told them, even as part of a game, even when they were all clearly drunk. To be so blase about their relationship, even if it wasn't a serious thing... She was furious to have it even brought up after working so hard to conceal it. 

"Youngest of seven. Gotta be," Jack said. "I can't imagine Charlotte would ever degrade herself enough to sleep with the likes of you."

"Agreed," Fuegoleon added. Nozel wrinkled his brow as he looked from Yami to Charlotte and back.

"I'm with them. I cannot fathom the two of you together."

Yami leaned back in his head and grinned. He took the cigarette from his lips and flicked the ash at its end into an empty glass. He chuckled as he looked at Charlotte.

Charlotte sighed and closed her eyes before rubbing her hands over her face and head. She clasped them at the back on her neck as she stared down at the table and sighed again. 

"I can't believe I'm doing this," she muttered. She prayed they were all too drunk to remember in the morning. "You all need to drink." She said softly before looking up from the table. She stared at a point on the wall to avoid the shocked looks. 

"What?" Jack leaned forward, gesturing with his long thin hands.

"You mean you slept with him, but you wouldn't even go out once with me?" Fuegoleon asked.

"You asked her out?" Nozel directed his question to Fuegoleon.

"Yeah, well, when my father was insisting I get married, sure. She's a beautiful woman from a good family, strong magic. Who wouldn't want to marry her?"

Nozel snorted and rolled his eyes.

"And that is why I didn't agree to go out with you, Fuegoleon. Do you know what would have happened if we had hit it off and gotten married? I would have had to leave the Knights, and I wasn't about to do that."

"Okay, but that doesn't explain how you and Yami..." Nozel flourished his hands instead of completing the sentence.

Charlotte sighed. Yami leaned toward her across the corner of the table. He smelled of cheap beer and his cigarettes, but despite the wrinkle of her nose as she caught a whiff of him, the nearness of him made her heart race.

"You want to tell them, or should I?" He whispered, his voice humming in her ear, and all the desire she had felt building surged back to her. She glared at him, feeding off of her anger so she could ignore the desire trying to overtake her. 

"It was once, and it was several years ago." She shot Yami a warning look as he leaned back against his seat again. "I was on a capture mission, hunting the leader of a bandit gang to bring him in for questioning. Roana told me at the time the guy was potentially part of a larger crime syndicate. So, I had been stalking him and had just found my chance  
when this idiot comes in and kills him."

"This doesn't sound like a good start." Jack leaned forward to listen.

"I was furious, so I start yelling at him and we start arguing."

"And then you start kissing." Fuegoleon rolled his eyes.

"No," Charlotte looked at the Lion squarely. "Then, I fell. But this wasn't just a little trip. The ground gave way beneath me and I go tumbling into an ice-cold, raging river. I must have blacked out because the next thing I remembered was being soaked, wet and freezing, and Yami crouched over me doing... something to get the water out of my lungs."

"Ugh, don't tell me it was an 'Oh Yami, how can I ever repay you?' sort of situation." Nozel interjected.

Charlotte sighed and took a small sip of her wine. She winced as it went down, wishing she had a glass of water or a nice hot cup of tea instead.

"Not at all." She slid the cup away from her across the table as she felt her head go a bit wobbly and a strange warmth spread through her. "We did have to wait for rescue though.  
The river washed us quite a distance from where I fell. and the forest was dense. After we built a shelter and fire, we had to dry our clothes."

"And then..." Fuegoleon tried to finish the story, only Charlotte shook her head slowly. 

"Then we tried to get warm, only I wasn't getting warm fast enough so we huddled together and eventually fell asleep."

"And then, you..." Jack looked at her expectantly

"We what?"

"You know." Jack's voice had a tinge of frustration to it.

"Know what?"

"Had sex, he's asking if you two had sex." Nozel teetered on the edge of madness. "Fuck, it's not that hard to figure out."

"What? No. Eww." Charlotte screwed up her face in disgust and as the three other men cried out in frustration and anger, she glanced slyly at Yami. "He just said we slept together. Nothing in there about sex."

Yami cackled wildly as he looked over at her.

"But, but..." Jack sputtered.

"It's a euphemism. Everyone knows that." Nozel groaned as he put his head in his hands.

"That's it. Charlotte wins." Fuegoleon laughed. "And we should be heading out lest we be hungover during the ceremony tomorrow." He slid out of the bench, stood and stretched. He yawned loudly.

"It's not fair." Nozel scooted across the bench. "She barely had a half a glass of wine. Out of the way, Vermillion." He kicked his toe out at Fuegoleon. "She had too great of an advantage, and you know it."

The Silver Eagle's captain followed the example of the Crimson Lion as he stood, even down to the yawn. Charlotte yawned in response, feeling a little lightheaded.

"At least finish the cup, Charlotte," Fuegoleon said. "To do otherwise would be a waste."

Charlotte took the cup and put it to her lips, sipping lightly. She smiled weakly at the two royals as she tried to hide her distaste. She didn't like the flavor nor the way it made her head feel. And the wooziness was growing stronger the longer she sat. She looked at the wall before her and felt the entire room shift. Someone took the glass of wine from her.  
Slowly she turned toward her now empty hand and caught a glance of Yami draining the wine from her cup.  

She chuckled and patted his cheek before darkness consumed her.

***

"And she's out," Jack said with a chuckle. "Who would have thought she was such a lightweight?"

Yami watched her, his lips turned up in a smile.

"A very cute lightweight, though." 

"We can't just leave her here passed out like this." 

Yami stood up, careful to not disturb her. Jack slid out after him.

"Should we take her back to the barracks, or?" Jack placed his hands on her hips.

"You think she'll be able to sober up at the barracks? Nah, go see if they have a room here. They usually do."

"You would know." Jack taunted as he crossed to the bar and waved the proprietor down. 

Yami glanced over his shoulder as Jack discussed matters with the bartender, but turned back and brushed Charlotte's braid from off of her eyes where it had fallen. He leaned over her and lifted her arm over his shoulders. She rose with him as he stood, though she hung limply beside him. 

"Not going to be any help at all, are you?" He muttered as Jack came back over to the table.

"Well, he's got a room she can sleep it off in upstairs. You need help?"

Yami wrapped one of his arms around her back and bent over once more to slip his other arm behind her knees, lifting her into his chest as he stood.

"Nah, I got her."

"She's going to kill you, ya know."

"Probably."

"You coming back to headquarters tonight?"

"Nah."

Jack laughed. 

"Far bolder than I." Jack started toward the door and tossed a wave over his shoulder. "Don't die."

Yami looked at Charlotte, sleeping in his arms. She wasn't exactly a pretty sight with her mouth gaping open and a slight bit of drool on her cheek, but Yami didn't care. She was still the most beautiful women he had ever seen. He carried her up narrow stairs not meant for more than one person at a time, sidling up them to avoid hitting her head on the wall. He set her feet on the ground to open the door and he had to pull her tightly to his side to keep her from falling. He stumbled through the door with her, their feet getting tangled together until he ended up practically dragging her through the door. 

The room was dark until he moved far enough into it where they were not blocking the light from the hallway. A small thin bed was pushed up against one wall and an unlit lamp sat on a square table next to it. Yami pulled Charlotte to the bed and laid her down in it before he lit the lamp and brought the warm glow of light to the room. Charlotte rolled over toward him, her eyes fluttering open, she looked up at him smiling in a way he had never seen on her face before. The smile was not the self-satisfied smile she had upon completing a job, the gracious smile she wore when she was trying to move people's hearts and minds, the frustrated and impatient smile she often gave him when he said something stupid, or even the rare smile he had seen when she had been truly happy. This smile was something different. It was a lazy smile, a want-to-be sultry smile which fell more on the side of awkwardness. 

"Hey." She reached out for him, her fingers grabbing at his pants leg because her arm was too heavy for her to lift at the moment, and he was still standing looking around the room. 

"Hey." Yami squatted next to the bed so he could look at her face to face.

Charlotte pawed at his face. She nearly stuck a finger in his eyes as she clumsily touched him.

"I missed you." 

"I missed you, too." He captured her hand in both of his and kissed her knuckles. 

Charlotte giggled and leaned more closely to him, hanging half her body off of the bed. 

"Kiss me, Yami." She whispered, pushing her lips against his cheek. 

"What are you doing?" He cradled her face with one hand, holding her so he could look into her dilated eyes. 

"I'm trying to get you to sleep with me." She said with a  look he assumed was her attempt to be sultry, but which ended in further giggling. 

Yami chuckled and rubbed his thumb over her cheek. He pulled her fingers to his lips again and kissed them. 

"I love seeing you so unguarded, Charlotte, but I'm not sleeping with you tonight." 

She ripped her hand from him and flopped onto her back. Yami groaned, frustrated with his response himself. 

"But I'm so, so, I just want you so much."

"I want you too." He stood and looked down on her before grabbing the small wooden chair which sat in the corner. He pulled the chair over next to her. 

"Then why?" She rolled onto her side once more. She looked up at him and pouted. Yami sighed as he looked at her. He was asking himself the same question. Had it been last year, had she been Vanessa, he would have thought nothing of it. She had asked and was willing, but he hesitated. And he couldn't figure out why.

He smiled and lit a cigarette. He took a deep drag on it as he contemplated the question. The only answer he could come up with was that he wished she wasn't drunk. But somehow that seemed like an excuse or a lie.

"I'm not going to sleep with you while you're drunk, Charlotte." The excuse was as good as any, though it somehow didn't sit quite right. Charlotte grunted and turned over in the narrow bed before passing out again. He thought she had just decided to ignore him until he heard soft snoring from her. Yami sighed and covered her with the thin blanket draped over the foot of the bed. He sat and watched her for a while until his neck began to ache from sitting in the chair. He stood and stretched. 

"She'll be fine." he murmured to himself as he walked to the door. He looked back at her as he opened the door and stepped into the hallway. He repeated it like a mantra as he walked down the stairs to the bar. 

"Everything settled?" The bartender asked when he appeared at the bar. 

"Uh, yeah." But Yami couldn't shake the uneasy feeling inside. "Can I have an ale?" He took a seat on the stool. The bartender fixed him a large stein and slid it across the bar.

"You know, I haven't seen her in there before. So that's Charlotte of the Blue Rose Knights. She's quite the lightweight, isn't she."

"Apparently." Yami took a sip. 

"I had thought you would have stayed up there with her." The older man waggled his eyebrows. "She's quite the looker, despite her reputation." 

Yami chuckled, mirthlessly to hide his own confusion

"Yeah, well, I guess I'm not that kind of guy." 

Yami glanced up at the older man as he polished a glass and looked around the empty room. Yami sipped on the ale in his cup. 

"I wonder how she'll feel when she wakes up." 

"What do you mean?" Yami voice was tight as he swallowed a large gulp.

"Well, she's all alone in a strange place. She'll probably be hungover too."

"Probably." Yami took another sip.

"It might be good for her to have a friend she can rely on." The bartender placed the glass down with a clink and picked up another one to buff dry. 

Yami looked at the rich golden liquid in the cup, imagining Charlotte waking up in the morning and the look of loneliness and desperation on her face he had seen only once before. He closed his eyes and brought the cup to his lips once more.

"I really should go back to headquarters."

The old man said nothing as Yami opened his eyes and placed the now empty stein on the bar top. He simply kept turning the cup in his hand to free the glass surface from the imperfections of water droplets.

"She's a grown woman. She'll be fine. And she would hate me, say I was calling her weak if I stayed to look over her."

Yami rubbed the back of his neck and looked at the bartender, who still said nothing. Yami sighed as he tried to get off of the stool, but could not bring himself to do so.

"But then, what if she gets sick? And she has an important day tomorrow, and..." Yami shook his head and sighed once more. "You don't have another room, do you?"

"Ah, no. Sorry. You put her in the last one." 

Yami looked at his empty cup. He wondered if he could simply lay with her without taking advantage of the situation. She was in no state to really participate in anything, and he wouldn't want to molest her while she was sleeping. He rapped his fingers along the bar top.

"I do have a bedroll though if you want it. Not as comfortable as a bed, but it's yours for the night if you need it."

Yami didn't especially want to sleep on the floor, but neither did he want to leave her on her own. 

"I'll take it." 

A few minutes later, Yami had laid the thin mattress and blanket out alongside the bed where Charlotte slept. She had stirred when he had entered again but quickly fell still. The bedroll was uncomfortable but better than laying on the bare floor, though it wouldn't have been the first time Yami had slept on the floor either. He slipped beneath the blanket as Charlotte's hand slipped off of the bed and hung next to his arm. Her fingers brushed his skin. Yami reached for her hand and interlaced their fingers. Part of him wished he had taken her up on her offer, but the more he thought about having sex with a drunken Charlotte, the less he liked the idea right now. Maybe another time, but not now. He closed his eyes and settled in for a night of fitful sleep. 

He woke up a few hours later with an unexpected weight against his arm and chest as Charlotte nestled herself next to him. He shifted until he could get up. He lifted her back into the bed and was ready to lay back down on the bedroll when she caught his arm. 

"Stay," she murmured, or at least he thought she did. Her grip on him was like iron until he slipped beneath the blanket with her. She sighed as she settled into the space between his arms and fell fast asleep. Yami stroked her hair, which had somehow come loose from the bun she typically wore until a peaceful, restful sleep took him.

***

Yami moved through the world as if he were in a fog. The world seemed familiar, as did the people he passed, but something was out of place. It wasn't until he saw one of his wayward kids that he could figure out what was wrong. Everyone seemed older, more mature. People greeted him, smiling, congratulating him for... something. He didn't know what.

A young girl, not more than ten, stood among the crowd. He had never seen her before, but she was somehow familiar. Her hair was dark and worn in a long braid over her shoulder and her eyes were piercing even through the crowd. She held a toddler who had the same dark hair, but who cried for his father and fussed to get down. 

The crowd shifted and the children were gone. He turned and found himself face to face with Charlotte. Bathed in a ring of light, She was sitting in a chair, her blond hair hanging down around her face. She cradled something, holding the bundle tightly to her chest. Only after he noticed the bundle and the swaying motion to her body did he see her exposed chest. 

Yami swallowed hard before he walked toward her. Once he crossed the threshold of light around her, the rest of the world fell away. She looked up at him and he could see the sheen of sweat on her skin and the exhaustion in her eyes, but she smiled at him, elated before returning her attention to the bundle in her arms and suckling at her breast. A tuft of black hair poked out of the blanket. Yami reached down to pull the fold of fabric back, his heart racing and his hands shaking.

And the world vanished as he opened his eyes. Charlotte's golden hair glowed orange in the light of the still-burning lamp. He brushed back her hair from her face and kissed the back of her head before settling down to sleep once more.

***

The sunlight was bright when Charlotte woke in a fit of panic. She was going to be late, she knew it. She tried to sit up, but a weight held her pinned to the bed. Lifting her head, she noticed the arm draped over her but immediately regretted the movement. Her head spun and she felt a wave of nausea hit her like a punch to the gut. She couldn't remember a time when she had felt so sick. She slowly turned over in the bed, fighting the desire to vomit with every movement, until she could see Yami's sleeping face.

Of course. 

She evaluated the situation the best she could, recalling her fractured memories from the night before. She remembered, quite distinctly, Yami rejecting her advances, so why was he in bed with her?

"Yami."

Yami grunted, but only grabbed onto her more tightly.

"Yami. Get up."

"Just a few more minutes."

"No. We need to get going. Besides, if anyone finds us."

"No one will know." He snuggled his head against her chest, before grunting again and sitting up. He rubbed at his cheek. "You don't have your magic laced through that shirt, do you? Damn that hurt."

"Sorry, but we really need to go. There's not much time before the ceremony and I... Whoa." Charlotte managed to sit next to him, but as she stood she wobbled and sat heavily on the bed once more. 

"You okay?"

"Head hurts and I feel like I want to throw up." Charlotte sighed at the admission of weakness.

"You sure can't handle liquor, can you?"

"How much did I drink?" Thoughts of the game came rushing back to her.

"Half a glass of wine." He whispered in her ear, but to her, it felt like a shout. Yami chuckled as Charlotte rubbed her head. "Hang on, I'll get you something for the headache at least." He scooted out of the foot of the bed, stood and stretched. Charlotte noticed his boots, belt and grimoire bag were missing, but he still wore everything else, even his squad robe. He disappeared out the door and as the bright opening closed behind him, Charlotte tried to stand once more. She hobbled over to a pitcher of water on a small table in the corner of the room. She held tightly to the table as she poured water from the pitcher to the bowl and used one hand to splash the cool clean liquid on her face. A small mirror sat above the table, in which Charlotte could see how haggard she looked. Her eyes were bloodshot and her hair looked stringy like she needed a good bath. But she was still fully dressed aside from the belt with her grimoire which hung from the bedpost. 

Yami returned a few minutes later with a tall glass of something in one hand and the fingers of the other closed in a tight fist. He handed her the glass which smelled rancid. She wrinkled her nose at it.

"Drink it. The owner says it should help." He held his fist out to her. "And these too." 

She held out her hand and he dropped two capsules into it. She looked at the small items, barely larger than a nut and frowned before she tossed them both into her mouth and swallowed them with a large gulp of the bitter drink. 

"Ugh."

"He said you should feel the effects almost immediately."

"Yeah, but I don't know if it's because it's working or because it tastes so bad."

Yami chuckled, but Charlotte didn't see what was so funny as she downed the rest of the cup. Still, she felt better, more focused, less nauseous. She placed the cup on the small table and looked at herself in the mirror. Except for her hair which had come loose in the night, she looked bright and alert, as if she had had the most restful night's sleep ever. She had her hair back in its trademark bun with a few quick, practiced moves. She turned her face from side to side. The drink had worked its magic and she felt ready to face the coming changes of the day.

She was not ready for Yami's arms snaking around her waist and his face nestled into her shoulder. In the mirror, all she could see was the top of his unruly hair. He rubbed his hands over her belly as she leaned back into him. The ache she had been feeling for the last several weeks hit her with a vengeance as she placed her hands over his.

"I had a weird dream." His soft voice strummed at her soul. She wanted to turn in his arms and lay her head against his chest, but he held her tightly. She settled for rubbing her cheeks against his hair. 

"Yeah?" 

"Um-hmm. It was weird but good." His lips hummed against her skin as he kissed where her jaw met her neck. She gasped. She wanted him now. She didn't want to wait until their birthday. Even a few days time would be too long. She forced herself around to face him, to kiss him. She knew he had no excuse now to turn her away, though, from the way he held on to her and the longing in his eyes which seemed to reflect her own, she didn't expect him to even try. 

"What was it about?" She asked between kisses. She backed into the small table, using it to help support her weight as he leaned into her. 

The chiming of the bells from the tower stopped them both in mid-kiss. Charlotte turned to the window, feeling her heart racing for an entirely different reason now. 

"Shit," Yami muttered.

"Shit is right." Charlotte panicked as she ducked beneath his arm. "I can't be late." She snatched her belt and grimoire from the bedpost and tightened it around her waist. She sat on the bed and pulled her boots on as quickly as she could.

"Will I at least see you for your birthday?"

Charlotte crossed a couple of steps to him and laid her hand on his cheek. She kissed him once. 

"Don't you mean for your birthday?" She kissed him again, quickly, softly. "Plan on it." She rushed out the door.

***

"I take it the concoction worked?" The bartender asked as Yami followed Charlotte down the stairs. The two men watched silently as Charlotte raced out of the tavern and into the mid-morning light. 

"Yeah, I would say so." Yami leaned on the bar. 

"One for the road?" 

"Yeah. I should be going myself." 

The bartender placed a warmed mug next to Yami, who polished off the drink quickly. Yami dropped a couple of coins on the counter before following Charlotte out into the light. A few moments later, the bartender opened the door himself. As he crossed the threshold, however, everything about him shifted, though the kindly, mysterious smile stayed the same.

***

The ceremony went by in a blur and in a few short moments, with a few short words, she stood before the gathered Magic Knights as the new Captain of the Blue Rose Knights brigade. The entire air of the room was surreal, but she stood and smiled for the polite applause. She scanned the room for Yami, but she could not find him in the crowd.   
The reception which followed was a far more reserved affair than the last time she had attended such an important promotion ceremony. Of course, the last one had been when Yami promoted, and Yami had a tendency to let things get out of hand. She looked around the room but still could not find him. 

"Looking for someone?" A different, rich, deep, familiar voice asked from behind her. Charlotte put on a polite smile in an effort to hide her searching.

"Good evening, Fuegoleon. I'm just... looking." 

"I see. Well, I wanted to congratulate you and officially welcome you to the rank of Captain." 

"Thank you." 

"It takes some getting used to, but if you have any questions or anything, just need someone to talk to, don't hesitate to reach out. We've all been where you are now."

"I will."

"And I guess I will see you at the meeting tomorrow then." He said with a nod before disappearing into the crowd. 

Charlotte, alone once more, looked around the room, now more certain than ever, that Yami was not in attendance. She sighed. 

"Excuse me, Charlotte, might I have a word with you?" 

She turned to see Julius Novochrono standing behind her with his quiet, enigmatic smile. 

"Of course, Lord Julius." 

He motioned for her to follow him into a small room down the hall from the main celebration.

"What did you need?" She asked, straight to the point once the door closed behind her.

"Are you doing alright?" His expression grew suddenly serious

"I'm fine." Confusion filled her at the question. 

"Nothing is... amiss? Nothing is off?" The confusion must have shown on her face. He rubbed his forehead and his cheeks held an uncharacteristic blush. "I mean, physically, with your... condition? With the spell?" 

The realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

"Oh! Right. I had sort of forgotten about that." Her hand went to her belly on instinct, right to the spot, she realized, Yami had been rubbing earlier. Could he know? 

"But I'm fine. I... I mean, I haven't had my menses since then, but..." She watched Julius' blush deepen and him shift uncomfortably from foot to foot. "But other than that, I'm perfectly fine."

"Can I check the spell? Actually, I'd rather remove it and place a new one. It's been three years. I'm not sure it would last much longer on its own. I mean unless you've come to a decision about it."

"Um..." She absently rubbed her belly once more. An incredible wave of guilt struck her over not telling Yami about the child in stasis within her.

"You still haven't told him?"

Charlotte hung her head.

"No."

"Charlotte, why are you hanging on to this pregnancy?"

"I... I want to have a child someday."

"But why this one?" Julius pried. 

"Because it's Yami's, and... I love him. I'm just not, I'm not sure if he loves me. I don't want to force him into we aren't ready for."

"I know Roana was always very strict with her knights, holding you all to the highest levels of behavior. But you are captain now. You can write your own rules."

"I think I want to keep things as they are. For now anyway." She was not sure if she meant the pregnancy, the brigade rules, or both.

She squirmed as Julius continued to look at her. His gaze seemed to shout at her to tell Yami about what had happened, but the thought still made her heart race in fear. Not of him, she was never afraid of him, but of what people would say, about how they would lose all respect for her.

"Alright," Julius said finally, his voice soft and understanding. He placed his hand over her belly and Charlotte felt a slight tingle as the spell was removed. A wave of nausea like those she had experienced all morning washed over her. Only this time, she could feel the bile rising up. She rushed to a sideboard and vomited into a fine china soup tureen. She took a deep breath and wiped her mouth.

"Sorry," She muttered, walking back to Julius.

"Alright now?" 

Charlotte nodded. She did indeed feel much better.

"You're sure about this?" Julius asked once more. Charlotte met his eyes and nodded. With the new position, she knew she could not also add raising a child to the list of her responsibilities. And the alternative... She knew Julius could do it. He could take the child's time and make it as if she had never been pregnant in the first place. She wouldn't have to worry about it. She would no longer have these moments when it hit her all of a sudden that she had a life frozen within her. She could go back to being normal.

But the memory of Yami's arms around her, his hands on her belly, like he had known all along... 

"I'm sure."

She felt a slight pinching and then expansion, and then nothing as the spell was put back in place.

"It's done." Julius sighed. "I've told you this before, but now that I know, for certain, it's Yami's, I really think you need to tell him. You may be surprised at his response."

Charlotte closed her eyes, sighing. She nodded. She would tell him this year, she vowed. They still planned to meet on their birthdays. The news would be one hell of a birthday present, she thought.

***

None of the detailed instructions Roana had given her in the week before she was given command of the brigade prepared Charlotte fully for what it meant to be in charge. The amount of paperwork alone was exhausting. And on top of it all, she had to deal with nearly every single internal conflict among the brigade members personally. She was exceedingly grateful for Mira stepping into the role of Vice-Captain, but she still collapsed into her bed out of exhaustion every night, letting the sweet embrace of oblivion take her until the morning. 

Her birthday had come and gone with barely a notice. As had Yami's. A personal note coming in with the requisition forms the day after her birthday had been her only clue. 

She recognized the seal immediately and did not need to read what was written to get a feeling for the contents. But she cracked the black wax open anyway. 

'So, I guess we're not getting together to celebrate.' was all that it said, dated on her birthday, not his. She could feel the resignation written in every letter, in how it was a statement and not a question. She landed heavily in her chair behind her desk and pushed the stacks of papers away to the opposite edge. She looked at the letter again. 

She had promised him, and she had failed. She had failed Julius as well, and herself. 

The job had taken far more getting used to than she had anticipated.

She took out her writing supplies and tried to respond. He deserved that much. 

***

Yami's mood was foul, more so than normal. He spent most of the time in his room, away from the rest of the squad. He told himself it was to spare them from his anger. They had done nothing to deserve his wrath. 

Only he wasn't angry. Not really.

His birthday had come and gone with barely a notice. Sure his squad had wished him a happy birthday and had even tried to have a party of sorts. One of the newest recruits had used her magic to make him a cake. It was delicious and he was truly grateful for their efforts. Vanessa had offered herself to him, saying they never spend time together anymore. 

She was right, of course, but she was also not who he wanted to spend time with.

Who he had wanted had never contacted him. 

Not on his birthday.

Not on her birthday.

And not even the day after.

He had written her a note late on her birthday, once it was clear he could not plan on seeing her as she had promised. Two days later, he was still in a funk--angry but more sad than anything, when Charlotte's response came.

She had gotten caught up in the work of running her brigade, she had written. She promised next year would be different. 

Yami lay on his bed. He held the letter above his head as he read it again. 

"Probably making more work for herself." He muttered as he sat up and stuffed the letter into a drawer with every other note she had ever written to him. "But then, she is a stickler for appearances." He pushed the drawer shut quickly and with a bang. 

Frustration had been building within him since the morning of her promotion. When the bells rang and she ran out of the room, he had been left wanting her. But he had been denied. He watched the awarding ceremony and saw her vested at the new Captain of the Blue Rose Knights. He beamed with pride, even though she looked confused and uncomfortable on the stage. Though he suspected only he could see those uncertainties beneath her calm facade. He also could feel his desire growing unchecked by the second. He had decided to skip the reception out of fear he could not keep his feelings under control. He might have been able to disappear at his own reception, but Charlotte did not have the benefit of having William stealing the show. And he was sure he would make a scene somehow.

And the frustration did not end once he had gotten home. Not when the dream he had of her with a child kept entering his mind every night. He did not know what to make of it all.

He looked at the drawer full of letters.

"Next year, huh?" He said out loud. "I will hold you to that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if you think it's out of character for those four to be hanging out, drinking together, but I thought it would be funny and it was fun to write.


	8. Night Eight

The captains had been dismissed from the monthly briefing meeting and Charlotte hung back collecting her notes on the matters facing the kingdom. They were all preparing for the entrance exam when hundreds of candidates would apply for a position among one of the nine brigades. Charlotte had focused the last year on advancing the ranks in her brigade and had several members reach retirement, and so she had many positions to fill, as well as the expansion of the brigade to  
consider as well.

Several promising candidates had already been identified, but she knew several more were likely to appear at the exam itself, especially from the common and forsaken realm. Her mind was reviewing the list of characteristics she wanted to look for in new brigade members as she walked down the hall.

“Charlotte.” The voice stopped her in her tracks. She turned toward the sound to see Yami leaning his shoulder against the corner of a darkened corridor.

"Yami? What..." She never completed the question as he grabbed her wrist and pulled her into the shadows with him. He pressed her against the wall and kissed her roughly. Despite herself and her former preoccupation with her work, she melted into his kiss. His scent filled her memory and cracked the dam she had built around all of her thoughts and feelings for him. The pressure of his lips against hers was like an earthquake splitting the wall around her desire in two. Her hands ran over his chest, around his neck and tangled in the back of his shaggy hair, as his arms slithered around her waist and pulled her closer.

His embrace was crushing, but she would gladly have him squeeze her until she broke if only he would never stop kissing her. 

When he pulled away from her, after an eternity which was far too short, she leaned heavily on him, trusting his strong arms to support her as her body nearly collapsed from the rush of emotions.

"You owe me." His voice was deep and gruff, as he growled in her ear. The feel of his breath against her skin sent shivers through her body.

"For what?" She forced her legs to support her weight.

"This year will be three birthdays you owe me for."

"Three?"

"Yep." Yami rubbed his nose in her hair before kissing her forehead.

"You could have gotten your present early last year if I recall." 

"And I told you why I didn't. So you owe me. You promised."

"But, the exam." She tried to tear her eyes away from him, but he caught her chin and pressed his body against her, forcing her back to straighten against the wall. He tilted her face to his until their eyes met.

"You promised. And I'm not letting you back out of it this time."

Charlotte released a shaky breath, her hands sliding from his neck to his shoulders.

"I'm sorry I forgot last year. How can I make it up to you?"

He released her chin and held up four fingers.

"Four days."

"What?"

"Come away with me for four days. Just us, somewhere we don't have to worry about what anyone else thinks of us, where the colors we wear don't matter."

"Four days is a long time."

He brushed her cheek lightly, and Charlotte saw sadness in his eyes.

"It's not nearly as long as you think."

"Two days." She countered after thinking a moment. Yami shook his head.

"Two days is the status quo, and you owe me for two years." 

"Didn't we spend the night together two years ago?"

"That was make-up sex. It doesn't count."

Charlotte opened her mouth to argue, closed it again when she could not find anything to say and then opened it once more, only to have her words silenced as he kissed her again. The weak feeling in her legs returned.

"You are impossible." She sighed, thankful for the wall at her back supporting her weight.

"I. want. a. celebration." Yami said, between kisses as he squeezed her tightly and supported her weight in his arms. Charlotte pressed her hands against his chest to give herself enough room to look at him.

"Three days. I think I can work around three."

"And nights." He kissed her neck where her jaw met her ear. Charlotte gasped. Yami froze, his grip on her shifting slightly as his attention was drawn by a sound down the hall. Charlotte felt her heart racing in her chest and breathed shallowly as she heard the voices coming down the hall as well. She forced herself to slow the panic filling her, to calm her breathing, to still her heart as the voices grew closer. She could barely see the main corridor from where the voices came, and she  
knew the shadows of the small hallway concealed them effectively. She was certain Yami had picked the spot for his ambush with those very characteristics in mind. She felt a shift in the mana around them as the shadowy niche grew darker until they stood entangled together in near-complete darkness. Only the glow from Yami's grimoire seeping from the cracks of the bag in which it was stored gave them any light whatsoever. 

"Fine, three days and nights." She whispered as he pulled her closer and she laid her head against his chest. She slipped her hands from his chest to his waist and squeezed him. 

"You know, for someone so concerned about people finding out about us, you certainly risk sharing that knowledge quite a bit." He said once he was sure the voices had passed without noticing them. 

Charlotte blushed scarlet and said a silent prayer of thanks that the bubble of magic surrounding them was so dark. He liked to tease her when she blushed. He wasn't above bringing it up in front of the  
others either, as she had learned over the past year. She was thankful, however, none of the other captains questioned her reactions to his behavior or why he seemed to know so much. 

"I bet your blushing right now." He purred in her ear, which only made her blush harder. He pulled her tightly against him, his hands gripping her hips and his fingers sliding over her buttocks. The movement made her painfully aware of how much he wanted her.

"Maybe we could go right now? At least for a little while? I could say the meeting ran longer than expected and no one would know."

The desperation in her voice surprised her. She could feel his grin as he pressed his lips against her forehead, and when he met her lips in a kiss, she nipped at them lightly. 

"Don't try to change the subject, My Queen of Thorns." 

"What were we talking about again?" She answered him with a grind of her hips against him. The motion made him groan as he pushed her against the wall once more. This time he trapped her hands above her head. He let the darkness in which he had enshrouded them fall away until the shadows in which they stood shone like the light of the noonday sun. He kissed her until her head spun until his kisses felt like rain washing away the dirt and grime she had collected on her soul over the past year or two. And when he pulled away from her lips, she followed like a moth seeking a flame. She panted, her lungs burning for oxygen as she looked up at him. 

"We were talking about getting away together." His voice sounded more strained than she remembered, more desperate than seductive. "So, where do you want to go?" He asked, his eyes smoldering with desire unresolved. He swallowed hard and she watched the muscles of his throat contract and relax with the motion before she placed her lips there and suckled at his warm skin. 

"Charlotte." He said her name like a prayer before enfolding her in his arms once more. 

"Should I stop?" 

He pulled her across the narrow hall and through a door into a small closet of a room. A table and chair occupied much of the room, but a narrow opening stretched into the distance on either side and sunlight illuminated the space through narrow slits in the wall, casting bars of bright light on the opposite walls. 

Yami hoisted her onto the table and pressed her back against the wall. 

"I fucking hate this armor." He murmured against her lips as his hands met the metal casing she wore. In response, she wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled herself toward him. She flung her arms around his neck, chuckling at the hiss erupted from his throat as her the cold metal bracers she wore touched his skin. 

Yami hastily unbuckled the leather strapping on her chest plate. Charlotte removed the pin holding his squad cape to his shoulder and let the tattered black fabric flutter to the floor as she ran her hands over her chest. 

Yami lifted the chest plate and the gorget from her body and she had never been so relieved to be free of the protective shell. He cupped her breasts, pressing his face into them before he slipped his hands beneath the black shirt she wore beneath her armor. Charlotte gasped, her breathing heavy as his fingertips ran over her nipples and squeezed her full bosom before pulling her shirt over her head.

"Where ever we go needs to be private enough where I can do this without you worrying about an audience," he said before clamping his lips around her hardened nipple. 

Charlotte ran her hands over his chest and arms, gasping at his every touch, desperately wishing she had some similar manner of means of torturing him. She slid her hands down his chest to his waist and fiddled with his belt. Admittedly, she concurred with his statement. 

As his lips and hands traveled over her bare chest and back, Charlotte wondered how she had gone so long without his touch. She wanted to be with him, she wanted to wake up next to him. She wanted him now.

As his belt hit the ground with a thud and a clatter of his grimoire and scabbard falling, Charlotte ran her fingers lightly around his waist, the tips of her fingers barely brushing the skin she exposed as she pulled his shirt out from his pants. His quick inhale at her touch drove her mad as she ripped his thin shirt over his head before planting her lips against the skin where his neck met his shoulder. 

"Ow." He cried out as she nipped at his skin. "Watch the teeth."

She chuckled before sucking at his skin. He pushed her away and back against the wall. Her lips made a sucking sound as she detached from his skin. 

"If you leave a mark on me, I'm gonna leave one on you."

Charlotte scratched her fingernails down his chest, leaving long red welts in their path. Another sudden inhale, and he lifted her hips from the table and pulled off the rest of her clothing. Charlotte heard the protective stockings she wore beneath her greaves tear as he stripped her from the waist down, but she didn't care, not at the moment. The table he had set her on was rough against the soft skin of her buttocks, but it scratched her for only a moment as he thrust himself inside her. She gasped at the sudden pressure of him within her, at the weight of his body pressing down on her. 

He kissed her, gently, softly. His hands ran over her body as he straightened up. He cradled her legs in his arms, gripping her hips as he moved his own in a slow steady rhythm. Her back rubbed along the rough wood of the table with each thrust. Charlotte lifted her head and ran her hands up his arms. She looked up at him until his gaze returned to her eyes. She had only given him a look and he seemed to  
understand what she wanted as he leaned over her again, this time holding her against him, lifting her as he straightened. Her arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders, Charlotte took the opportunity to quicken the pace. She kissed him deeply, feeling safe and secure in his embrace, as she tightened her grip on him. 

He wanted to go slower, she could tell in how he held her, in how he had entered her, but Charlotte could not afford a leisurely pace. 

"Are you going to fuck me or what, Yami?" She breathed into his ear, spurring him into further action. She gasped at the speed of her release. Her euphoria still consumed her as she felt the subtle pulsation and stiffening of his body as he released within her. He set her down on the table's edge once more and pressed his forehead into her shoulder. He squeezed her tightly to his chest. 

"So, what should we do for these three days you owe me?"

Charlotte sighed.

"Yami..."

"Don't think that this counts. I want more than a quicky in the office." 

"Nothing counts for you, does it?"

His eyes seemed to glisten as he smiled at her.

"Nope." He kissed her again. "I just want to spend more time with you, Charlotte. Is that so wrong?" 

She took a deep breath, taking in the nearness of him, feeling his hands on her waist once more as he pulled her to standing. 

"I guess not."

"So, let's go somewhere. Find a place where we can get away from the knights and our squads, from anyone who would recognize us for our positions."

"Somewhere secluded?"

"Where it can be just us for a few days."

"We'll have to eat." Charlotte pointed out. 

"Well, maybe somewhere near enough to a town then. Maybe in the mountains? Or, or maybe the beach?" His eyebrows rose hopefully. 

Charlotte rubbed her hands over his chest. A secluded getaway sounded amazing, and the more she thought about it, the more she wanted to go with him. And the beach sounded like a grand idea. She hadn't been to the ocean in years. But then, it had been just as long since she had been to the mountains.

"Maybe both?"

"Both? I don't know if we'll have time for both."

She kissed him quickly on the cheek before she fumbled around behind her for her shirt. 

"I have no doubt you can figure it out." 

Yami sighed as he hoisted his trousers over his hips. Charlotte wriggled out from between him and the table and found the rest of her clothes quickly.

"Besides, we have work to do." She said as she fastened the clasp which held her cloak. 

"Oh, I will figure it out." His voice sent shivers down her spine as it reverberated in her ear. "So, you better make plans for your squad." 

She leaned into him, relishing the feel of his arms supporting her. 

"I will." 

"Should I pick you up?"

Charlotte stiffened.

"Absolutely not."

Yami chuckled.

"Joking. Wanna meet where we always seem to?"

Charlotte closed her eyes, smiling. She wondered if the old man who owned the noodle shop was doing well, if he was still alive, and what he would think about them now. She nodded.

"Yeah."

Yami squeezed her and she could hear him inhale deeply as if he were breathing in her scent like air, or those damn cigarettes he always seemed to have between his lips. 

And then his touch disappeared. She looked behind her to watch him dressing again for a moment before creeping out of the door into the hallway. 

She wore her excitement the entire way home.

***

Yami watched the door close behind her as he faced a dilemma. The dream he had had of her holding a child haunted him, but not in a bad way. He couldn't describe what he felt when it popped up in his mind, but now, almost a year later, the image of her exhausted, exhilarated smile was as vivid as the first time, and it struck him  
at his core. 

He had meant to talk to her about it, but he had not quite figured out what it meant or what he wanted it to mean. He knew the dream child was his. He did not doubt that matter. Sometimes when the image sprang to mind, the thought made him ecstatic, but other times he saw her smile at the small bundle and terror shot through him. 

He hadn't told anyone about the dream. He wanted to tell her first. Only things kept interrupting him. Telling her about it was one reason he had called her over, but the nearness of her always messed with his head. And now he had missed his chance. 

He smiled as he fastened his belt around his waist and then his cape at his shoulder. At least she had said yes to the trip. He would have his opportunity to tell her then. But first, he needed to find a place where she could have both the mountains and the beach. 

***

Yami had come up empty-handed in his search for a place to bring Charlotte. Nothing seemed to quite fit the bill. He wandered through the archives at Magic Knight headquarters wracking his brain when a voice called out to him.

"Yami? I would have thought you had gone home already." 

Yami turned to see Julius standing behind him, his tall frame filling a doorway in the side of the hall. He wore the same mysterious smile he always wore, the one which Yami could never quite read.

"I, uh, I had something I was trying to figure out. But I've had no luck, so I was heading home now." Something in the way the older man looked at him had always been a little unsettling, making it difficult for Yami to hide much of what he was thinking from the man. Whenever he had tried to hide something from him, Julius always had a way of figuring it out. Sometimes Yami wondered if he wasn't a mind mage like Marx who made everyone think he was a time mage.

"Anything I can help you with?"

A flurry of questions filled Yami's mind. He opened his mouth to ask, but so many questions flashed through his thoughts so rapidly nothing came out. He closed his mouth again. Julius gestured him inside the room. 

"Whatever is troubling you must be serious if you are here doing research. Is there a problem I ought to know about?"

Yami looked at the floor and then met his mentor's eyes. Should he know about the on and off fling he had with Charlotte? Yami couldn't consider it quite a relationship, and he didn't quite know how to describe it to anyone else, or even to himself for that matter.

"No. It's more a personal matter."

Julius' eyebrows shot upward, and Yami realized he had piqued the Wizard King's interest. 

"Oh?"

Yami took a breath and rubbed his hand over his face. Maybe Julius might have an idea?

"So, I was planning a little trip for my birthday."

"I thought you didn't like to celebrate your birthday."

"I... I don't." Think of something quick... "I just wanted to get away from my squad for a bit, because they like to try and make me do things for my birthday." Good; he should believe that.

Julius pressed his lips together in a thin line and nodded his head slowly, in a way which Yami had always known he had not believed a word of what he had just said.

"Anyway, I was looking for a place away from pretty much everywhere."

"And you couldn't find any?"

"Not any which are also near the beach and the mountains."

"Ah, that is a tall order. Any reason why you need both? Why not one of the other?" 

"I, um..." Dammit... "I was going to bring someone with me and she wanted both."

"Oh?" Julius' smile broadened into a grin and his eyebrows shot skyward. "Someone I know?"

Yami sighed.

"No." Yes. And he knew Julius could see right through him. But the Wizard King let him keep his secrets and did not press matters anymore. He simply smiled at Yami and crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Well, there is one place I know. It's on the beach, but pretty close to the mountains, and has a great view of them. Though I guess you might not be too interested in the view." Julius chuckled. "So Yami has a girlfriend?"

"I'm not a child anymore, you know. And I wouldn't exactly call her my girlfriend."

"I know I know. Just, let me have this proud father moment, please. You know I don't have a family of my own to live through."

Yami rubbed his hands over his face once more and sighed. He looked up at the ceiling wondering what he had done to deserve being the surrogate son of this magic crazed fool before remembering how Julius bought his affection with food.

"So where is this place you know?"

"First, what's her name?"

"I don't have to tell you that. Besides," Yami rubbed the back of his neck as he looked at the ground between them. "It's not that serious." But the grunt Julius responded with told him he did not believe a word Yami had said.

"If you say so. Anyway, I have access to a house in Raquey. It's got a private beach and close to a mountain overlook. I hardly ever go there, so I don't know what kind of condition it's in, but it was a nice place to get away for a few days."

"Raquey?"

"It's down on the coast. Not too far from where I found you."

"Well, I guess it's as good as I can get," Yami said, but he felt grateful for Julius' help despite the subtle prodding. 

Julius nodded before he circled the desk and fished through a drawer. He pulled out an iron key and a small scrap of paper. He placed them both in Yami's hand.

"Directions and the key to the place."

"Thanks, Julius."

"Just don't burn the place down, alright?"

Yami smiled with a chuckle. 

"Right." He nodded before turning to the door.

"Oh, and Yami? Make sure Charlotte has fun." Julius called out to him as the door closed behind him. 

Yami stood frozen for a moment, wondering how Julius had known. But then Julius was Julius and he always seemed to know everything, even when it wasn't his business. especially when it wasn't his business.

Yami turned the key in his fingers, letting the light glint dully off the surface. 

"At least, I know Julius can keep a secret." He muttered as he stuffed the key and the directions into a pouch and set off for home.

***

Charlotte turned the note she had received over in her hands several times. She placed it on her desk and picked it up again, reading the precisely formed letters which made up a single sentence. The note stated the place and time she and Yami were to meet for their little escape. She had not forgotten about the trip he had talked her into, but she had spent the last week nervously trying to talk herself out of going. She stood up and walked across the hall to where her Vice Captain should have been finalizing a supply list for the coming month.

"Mira, have you sent of those requisitions to the capital?" Charlotte asked as she entered the room without looking up from the note in her hand. When Mira did not immediately answer, Charlotte looked up and sighed in frustration. 

"How am I supposed to go out for any personal time if my Vice Captain is so lax with her duties?" She muttered beneath her breath, not missing the irony of Yami's situation, but in Yami's case, she knew it was the Captain himself who was far too lax with his work and the attitude had infected the entire squad.

Charlotte stormed back to her own office and left the door open, hoping she would catch Mira returning. In the meantime, she knocked out all of the squad reports for the last month and reviewed the candidates for Magic Knights from the royal and noble houses. She was certain most of them would be scooped up by one of the more highly ranked brigades, but a few struck her as good potential matches. She had hoped to interview them before the exams. As she looked over the reports of the few commoners who had already submitted their names for consideration, Mira returned.

"Mira, a word please." 

The shorter woman froze in her tracks and turned toward Charlotte's door before slinking in and taking a seat. Charlotte looked up at her, not as a friend, but as her superior.

"What's the problem? Oh, Charlotte, you look just like the former Captain, it's scary." Mira straightened in her seat.

Charlotte blinked and sighed. She had been warned before she had taken the job, warned about changing relationships. She hadn't wanted to believe it, and she had thought her friendship with Mira would have been safe. But looking at the woman across the desk, she realized everything she had been warned about was coming to pass. 

"I'm sorry," Charlotte said, fighting the inevitable change in how the two women saw each other. "I'm just... on edge. I'm supposed to go away for a few days and I need to make sure everything is going to run smoothly while I'm gone." 

"Don't worry, Charlotte. I've got this. I've already taken care of the scheduling and the requisitions for while you're gone. I know you've been meaning to visit your grandmother, especially since her health has been ailing these last few years."

Charlotte tapped her fingers on the desktop and looked at the stack of recently completed paperwork. True, she had planned to visit her grandmother while she was away, as she had told Mira; it wasn't exactly a lie.

But she should have known better than to try to keep things from her best friend. 

"Or is your grandmother only part of the reason you're taking a few days off?" Mira leaned on the table, whispering conspiratorially. 

Charlotte sighed as the tapping of her fingers grew louder. 

"Fine. No, it's not the only reason. I mean, it is my birthday too. Well, our birthdays."

Mira gave her a self-satisfied smile. 

"I knew it. I knew there was more to this sudden vacation than just a sick grandmother. So where are you going?" She propped her elbows on the table and rested her chin on her fists, but her entire body seemed as if it were about to combust from excitement.

"I don't know. He hasn't told me."

"Oh, this is so exciting. And so romantic."

"I don't know if I would call it that..."

"But isn't it? A secret rendezvous in a place unknown... I wonder if he's trying to get serious, you know, take this to the next level or something?"

Charlotte opened her mouth but closed it again. She recalled his words to her a few years prior, when he had told her exactly what he wanted, but she had chosen to maintain the status quo. She did not have the heart to tell her friend they had already come to the line and she had stepped away from it.

"It's nothing like that. It's just sex." Charlotte could feel herself blushing at the word. Mira leaned back heavily in the chair, huffing in disappointment. "But I need to know everything is going to be fine here."

"It will be. And I need to know that you will be fine there. You have no idea where you might be going?"

"There was some mention of the mountains but also the beach? And he hadn't told me anything since then."

Mira crossed her arms and chewed on her lip in thought. Charlotte worried. What could the other woman be thinking about?

"Well, we need to make sure you are properly packed for either then. And I bet you don't even have a bathing suit." Mira stood up from the chair, pushing against the arms to propel herself upwards as if she were a rocket. She circled the desk and grabbed Charlotte by the arm. 

"Come on, we need to go shopping."

"Mira, wait!" 

Despite her size, Charlotte was impressed by her friend's strength and quickly found herself unable to resist. Or maybe she didn't want to?

***

The visit to her grandmother had been uneventful, though Charlotte did have to explain why she was only staying the night. The old woman's eyes twinkled as she gave Charlotte a sly smile. 

"I was wondering why you were wearing your hair down. And that dress looks lovely on you, Charly."

"Thanks, Grandma. I... I'm so nervous."

"Don't be. Have fun. Let him see what he's missing the rest of the year."

"More like the other way around, but, yeah."

"Wait, you mean you are the one holding things back? Well, that's unusual. Not surprising, but unusual." 

"With our jobs, though, I think it would be... difficult to move forward."

Her grandmother nodded and patted her hand.

"I understand. I gave up so much to be with your grandfather. Still, I wouldn't mind seeing some great-grandchildren, you know. But, no rush."

Charlotte shook her head with a chuckle.

"We'll see, Grandma. She kissed the old woman on the cheek as she stood. "I should be going to meet him soon."

"Yes, yes. Have fun, Charlotte, and let yourself be happy for once." 

***

"You seem anxious." The old cook poured Yami another drink as he sat at the worn counter in the noodle shop. Yami turned his attention from the door to the old man.

"Hmm? Oh, thanks." He picked up the small cup.

"I said you seem anxious."

Yami looked at the clear liquid in the cup, swirling it slowly before bringing it to his lips. A smile crept on his lips as he took a sip.

"I'm just waiting." He placed the cup back on the table and looked toward the door once more.

"For someone in particular? Maybe someone with blond hair and blue eyes?" The old man chuckled, amused. 

"Yeah." Yami sighed, and then grunted. He had promised himself he would try to be discrete, for her sake.

"You two have been seeing each other for a while now."

"Not really. I mean, we don't see each other often in between." Yami took another sip, wishing it wasn't the case.

"Well, in that case, when are you two going to get serious? I've only got a few years left in me, and I think I deserve to be invited to the wedding." The old man smiled with feigned indignant rage. Yami chuckled as he brought the cup to his lips for another sip. 

Motion at the door caught both of their eyes as Charlotte pushed her way past the curtain marking the entrance. She seemed frantic, rushed, as she hurried over to the counter.

"Sorry, I'm late." She placed a small bag on the floor next to the stool before hopping up on the thinly cushioned surface. 

"You are always right on time." Yami looked her over and couldn't keep the small smile from his lips.

"Don't tell me you're drunk already."

"I've had one." Yami insisted.

"Two." The old man behind the bar corrected. 

Charlotte rolled her eyes and then gasped as Yami pressed his lips against her cheek. She could feel her face redden as she rubbed her fingers over the spot where he had planted the kiss. She glanced at him out the corner of her eyes to see a self-satisfied smile on his lips before he polished off the rest of the small cup. 

"Ready to go?" Yami said standing up and paying for his drink.

"You never told me where we were going." 

"It's a surprise." He leaned over and picked up her bag. He held his hand out to her. "Come on." He wiggled his fingers, beckoning her until she placed  
her hand in his.

"If you tell me where I can take us there." 

He walked to the door, pulling her behind him.

"A flying mass of rose vines are probably not the best way to keep a low profile."

Charlotte heard the old man at the counter chuckling.

"Well, how are we going to get there?" 

Yami grabbed a broom which stood near the door before leading her into the cool evening air. Once he crossed the threshold, he tossed the wooden handle to the side, which hovered in the air, waiting. He jumped onto the narrow stick, crouching and centering his balance point over his feet. He slung the handle of her bag over the end of the broomstick.

Charlotte looked at him in disbelief.

"Are you serious? We both can't fit on there."

"Sure we can." Yami patted the broom handle next to him. 

Charlotte sighed and closed the distance to him. She examined the space available to her, turned around and hopped up onto the waiting seat. She gripped the front end of the broom with one hand so tightly she could already feel her hand going numb.

"Don't worry, I won't let you fall." He whispered into her ear before launching them into the coming night.

Charlotte could smell the sea air before she could see it, but once they rounded one mountain, she gasped as the full moon glinted like a silver ribbon on the waves which seemed to stretch forever.

"You like it?"

"It's beautiful."

Yami slipped his arm around her shoulders and she leaned into him, thankful he eventually took a seat next to her. He pointed down toward a string of glittering lights--golden to contrast with the silver of the moon.

"That's where we're going."

A quick review of where they started and a glance up at the stars gave Charlotte all the information she needed.

"Raquey? How did you get a place in Raquey? It's super exclusive. Even my father had to make arrangements months in advance to have a place here for a few days."

Yami shrugged.

"I know a guy. We aren't quite in the city, but I figured it would be better that way." 

The broom descended into a darkened, secluded area of beach, a cove cut off from the rest of the region by a rocky line. A small house hugged the spot where the rain forest met the sand. Moonlight reflected off of panes of glass, turning the building into a jewel in the night.

Charlotte stepped from the broom and stood speechless as she took in the scene. She looked at as much as she could in the darkness, spinning around as she tried to take in the entirety of her surroundings. 

"Yami, I..." She spun around again before looking up at him.

"You like it?" He said with a crooked smile. 

Charlotte could only nod her head. She yelped in surprise as he scooped her up and carried her to the house.

"Good. We can get a better look at it in the morning."

***

Yami had imagined what would happen when they arrived nearly every waking moment since Julius had given him the go-ahead to use the building. He had not imagined Charlotte would be knocked speechless, nor remain that way the entire trek to the house. He also imagined what they would do for the duration of their time together, which he imagined would constitute a fair amount of sex, sleeping, and eating.

Not the long cuddle session which eventually led to them falling asleep in each other's arms upon collapsing into the bed. 

But damn, did it feel good. 

He woke in the early hours of the morning to her nuzzling his neck and her hair tickling his nose. He wanted to fall back to sleep with the warmth of her pressed against him. He didn't remember a night where he had slept so well or felt so rested, and he wanted to get back to it.

But he also wanted to sneeze from the motion of her fine hairs against his nose.

Right as he felt the sneeze coming on, she shifted, turning away from him, leaving the space where she had been bare and cold. He followed her, rolling onto his side and sliding his arm beneath her head, seeking her warmth.

She leaned into him.

"Hey." Her voice cracked with disuse. 

He nuzzled her hair, grunting his response. His hand ran down her side, over her hip, and down her thigh before sliding up her belly and over her breasts. He had wanted sleep a moment before, but her acknowledgment turned his sleepiness to arousal. He kissed her shoulder, only to hear her soft moan as his hands traversed her body once more. Her soft voice, filled with longing, spurred him on and he threw caution to the wind--not that he had much use for caution regardless. He covered her body with his and kissed her deeply, relishing the touch of her fingertips against his skin as she pulled him into her. She slipped her leg to the outside of his, wrapping them around his waist. His lips nibbled down her neck to her breasts, where he teased her with his tongue. 

"Yami." She scratched her nails down his back, leaving tracts of pain blossoming in their wake as she tightened her hold on his hips, pulling him closer. He looked up to her lust-filled eyes, seeing the unequivocal 'yes' within them as she slid one hand down his cheek and over his chest. 

He dove into her single-mindedly, seeking nothing but their shared pleasure until they lay, exhausted and spent in each other's arms.

***

The rising sun hit Yami's eyes at exactly the right angle to annoy him into wakefulness. And with the blinking of his eyes and his conscious return from the sweet oblivion of sleep, hunger struck as well. He looked over at Charlotte, who had curled up on her side once more and still slept soundly before he slipped out of the bed. The breeze coming in from the ocean held a peculiar quality of being both warm and cool at the same time. Or maybe it was something about the salt in  
the air which made him... nostalgic in a way? 

He stretched and shrugged away the thought as he stood naked in the breeze for a moment. The grumbling in his stomach demanded attention quickly, cutting short his enjoyment of the sea air. Throwing on his pants, Yami made his way to the small kitchen in the house. He cursed himself for not picking up any ingredients, but when he opened the cabinets, he found the place to be fully stocked with a variety of food. He also found a note from Julius.

Yami chuckled as he read the brief missive, realizing just how much he had let the secret slip. Either that or Julius was just that good at guessing. Honestly, it was likely a combination of both, Yami thought as he sifted through the contents of the kitchen. Looking at the ingredients, he decided his best course of action for breakfast was bacon and eggs. He pulled out a pan and started working.

As he cooked, Yami's mind wandered to the dream which had been haunting him for the last year. The dream had filled him with equal parts excitement and dread. Over the last year he tried to figure out why, but as the cracked eggs into the pan and watched them sizzle from the heat, realization dawned on him. 

He wanted a family.

With her.

At some point anyway.

But he did not want one right now. The thought of having a family terrified him like no other thought ever had. He hadn't the faintest idea of what it would be like to be a father, even less of what it would be like to have a tiny baby. His only reference on the matter had not come into his life until he was nearly an adult himself. 

At least, that he could remember clearly.

He frowned as he stirred the eggs, breaking their yolks and allowing the rich orange centers to marbleize the already cooked whites. More troublesome thoughts came to mind about the dream.

"I guess it's best to keep it a dream." He stirred the eggs until they were cooked through. He placed the bacon in another pan to fry as his mind sorted a list of the pros and cons of pursuing the future he had seen in his dream.

"What smells delicious?" Charlotte's voice startled him out of his contemplation.

"What it is, is breakfast." He finished up cooking and placed the eggs and bacon on a pair of plates and set them on the counter. Charlotte sat on a stool on the other side. She picked at a piece of bacon eagerly as he placed an empty plate before her. "Help yourself." Yami handed her a serving spoon. He watched as she piled more than he had imagined she would onto the empty, waiting plate. 

"I had no idea you could cook this well." She said between bites. "I'm horrible at cooking."

"So a gathered. But it's only bacon and eggs. It's not difficult."

Charlotte shook her head.

"I can burn water," Charlotte admitted with easy laughter which Yami found to be both disarming and refreshing. The smile on her face seemed reminiscent of how she looked in his dream.

Yami chuckled as he took a bite of bacon. They ate in comfortable silence, sneaking glances at each other. Charlotte still had her hair down after their love-making and was dressed in a loose white tunic which did little to conceal her features. And he felt desire building within him once more. 

He cleared his throat and looked at the food before him.

"Charlotte, I'm sorry." He could not meet her eyes as her fork clinked against the ceramic of the plate.

"For what?"

Yami took a deep breath. 

"For earlier. I didn't mean to get so... insistent."

Charlotte laughed.

"I seem to remember being a bit insistent myself." She reached across the counter and rubbed her hand over his.

"I mean, at the end. I... we've been taking too many risks." Her hand stopped, resting on his arm, her body leaning over her plate of food.

"What risks are you talking about?"

Yami looked at the plate before her and shrugged his shoulders.

"We've been lucky, probably because of your insistence on not seeing each other more often. But we haven't given what could happen much thought either. We're lucky we haven't had an accident." 

Charlotte sat back looking at him. She folded her hands in front of her for a moment before they disappeared beneath the bar top into her lap. Yami caught the motion out of the corner of his eye.

"I'm just saying we should probably, I don't know, use some sort of protection."

***

Charlotte watched him, noting the nervous tilt to his shoulders and the way he refused to look at her directly. Her heart raced and screamed at her to tell him. She had tried so many times to find the right word, the right way, the right time. She had never been able to get the thought from her mind to her lips without the words getting stuck.

But now, he had mentioned it. Completely out of the blue. Or he insinuated it anyway. But she had never been as good as him at reading body language.

"Protection for what?" She pressed. She felt she knew the answer, knew what he was going to say, but she needed to hear him say it.

"You know, so you don't get pregnant." 

She pressed her hands into her belly, trying to feel the minuscule knot of magic which had been placed there.

"I don't think we have to worry about that." Charlotte stared at the uneaten bacon sitting on her plate. The smell, which had been so enticing before, now made her stomach turn. 

"I mean, a kid is the last thing we need. And it would be hard to keep that a secret from your squad. Besides, who would raise it? I would be a terrible father." Yami rambled, his eyes darting everywhere around the room, except to her. The excuses he presented sounded to Charlotte as if he were trying to convince himself. 

"Yami." She took a deep breath and released it slowly. Now or never, a voice whispered inside of her. 

But Yami's ramblings continued, growing more and more negative along the way.

"And our jobs are so demanding and dangerous. Who in their right mind would want to bring a kid into this world?"

"Yami."

He finally looked up at her.

"What?"

"But if it did happen, how would you feel?"

Yami opened his mouth, closed it and then opened it again. Still, no words came out.

"Would you want me to keep it?"

She pressed her lips into a line and silently cursed herself for once again not being able to tell him directly. She only hoped he would be able to pick up on the hints. She picked at the eggs on her plate, taking in the way their color shifted from white to yellow in swirls where he had stirred them as they cooked. She glanced up at him only to see him staring into the distance, to something she could not see, lost in thought.

"That's not my decision to make, Charlotte." The softness in his voice was girded with uncertainty. 

Charlotte sighed as the frustration which had built up over the last several years erupted. She put down her fork and looked up at him, demanding further explanation with her silent stare.

"You have much more to lose in that situation than I do." His attention was still elsewhere. "I don't think my opinion would matter much."

Charlotte gripped the edge of the counter, feeling her knuckles go white. Had she been stronger, she might have cracked the wooden surface in her swirl of undirected emotions. She felt too much, too keenly to tell what feelings were what as they jumbled inside her.

"Let's assume then I wanted your opinion. What would you say?"

***

The dream played over and over in his mind, flashing scenes of faces--somehow a blending of his with hers, of her tired eyes and brilliant smile, of his heart racing, of uncertainty. and excitement. and fear.

"What would you say?" Something in the tone of her voice broke the spell the dream had on him. 

What would he say? How could he say anything? He could not make this decision. Not when it was her body, her station on the chopping block. He had seen what happened to noblewomen who got pregnant out of wedlock. No quicker way to become a peasant. He certainly would not want her to do something to jeopardize everything she had worked for. 

Something desperate in her eyes begged for an answer, but despite everything, he could not tell which answer she wanted. 

Nor, when he searched his heart, could he determine what he wanted. The dream both haunted and soothed him depending on the moment.

"I don't know." He admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

Charlotte pushed back from the counter. The stool on which she sat made a loud grinding noise as it slid against the floor. She stood up and walked back into the bedroom they had shared the night before. She closed the door behind her, perhaps with a bit too much force, though Yami did not think it was exactly a slam. 

Yami watched the door from behind the counter for several long minutes. He picked up a slice of bacon and nibbled on it, wondering if Charlotte was ever going to come out of the room. She emerged after a while. She was fully dressed in a long light blue tunic and her hair was pulled back in a loose bun, different from her more severe style. She held a wide-brimmed hat in her hand. She walked through the  
kitchen to the door and disappeared from the building before Yami could open his mouth to say anything. He stepped away from the counter and walked to the balcony which overlooked the ocean. The crashing of the waves sounded distant, roaring in his memory more than his ears at the distance the house sat perched above the shoreline.

The sun glittered on the waves as he pulled out a cigarette, lit it, and inhaled deeply. Something about what he had said, his indecisive response to her question had bothered Charlotte. He was certain of it, but for the life of him, he could not figure out why she would be so upset over hypotheticals. 

***

Charlotte stormed down the steps to the beach, angry.

"I should have told him anyway," she muttered as her bare feet slapped against the wooden stairs. "And I should have worn shoes." She rubbed at her foot which had scratched hard against the rough wooden step. "I should have just come out and said it... 'Yami, I'm pregnant.'" 

She stepped into the warm sand at the bottom of the staircase and dug her toes into the soft surface. Something about the movement, along with the sound of the ocean, which seemed so much louder from the beach, sapped the nervous energy from her. The cool, salty breeze forced her to breathe deeply, to take in the melange of scents which could only be described as the ocean. Charlotte took another deep breath, feeling her heartbeat slow as she sauntered toward the line where the waves lapped at the sand. 

The sand slipped and shifted beneath her feet, as her feelings on the matter which had driven her to the shore also slipped and shifted. She hitched up the length of her skirt as she let the waves wash over her feet. She gasped from the chill of the water with each crashing wave. 

Yami's arguments rang hollowly through her mind as she walked in the surf. 

"Who would bring a child into this world..." She sighed. "Who indeed?" She hated to admit how often she had wondered the same question and the question which inevitably followed--Why was she holding on to this pregnancy?

Charlotte wiped tears from her cheeks, tears she had never thought to allow to fall. But she made up her mind. He was uncomfortable with the idea of them having a child together, or maybe it was with having a child period. And she had only entertained the thought once it had happened. 

"No, he's right." She nodded as she spoke aloud, needing to hear the words, needing to say them. "This would be a terrible idea. For both of us." She nodded more as if she were trying to convince herself. 

"I'm going to see Julius when we get back." She stood in the surf looking out over the vastness of the ocean. "I'm going to end it. I've been too indecisive for too long." 

Charlotte took a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling confident in her decision. 

And yet, she could not stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks.

***

He watched her from the balcony as she walked along the sand--a pale white dot moving across a tan field. The wind whipped through her hair, blowing the long golden strands around her head. She held her skirt with one hand and tried to tame the loose locks with the other as she looked out over the ocean. 

As Yami watched, he saw her again in his mind, closer this time, as she looked over her shoulder at him with a smile that stopped his heart. The look was brief as her attention was drawn away from him by a dark-haired child tugging at her skirt. She crouched down to be at the child's level.

Yami blinked and the vision was gone, replaced by the distant image of her standing in the surf watching the ocean.

"She would make a good mother." He stuck another cigarette between his lips. He knew, in his heart and soul, he was right. She would be an excellent, caring mother. And he admitted to himself he would not be averse to having a family. Maybe. Someday. 

But, as soothing as the dream which haunted him was, he could not see her choose to give up her squad to have a family. He inhaled deeply as he watched her, surf swirling around her ankles. A part of him ached to be with her, to hold her hand, to let her voice weave its way through his mind and soul. He felt a strange easiness with her, a sort of relaxation he could not remember feeling at any other time. He certainly woke more rested after sleeping with her, regardless of  
whether they had sex or not. Something about her brought peace to his soul.

He wondered if she felt the same sense of ease with him. 

He wanted to be with her on the beach, but something in the way she left made him hold back. He could sense well enough she was angry about something as she stormed out of the apartment. He did not need ki to tell him that. He knew the talk of pregnancy had been the trigger. He wondered if she had thought about them starting a family before if she had come to a different conclusion. 

If she had, why hadn't she told him? 

Yami looked out to the horizon, where the sea met the sky as he flicked the smoldering ash from the end of the cigarette. 

She had already rejected his suggestion to deepen their relationship once. Did she have second thoughts? 

By the time his attention drifted back to the shore where the tide was rising, Charlotte was gone. He finished his cigarette and turned back to the small kitchen where he began cleaning up from breakfast. 

A short while later, he heard the door slide closed. Charlotte's footsteps echoed softly, timidly through the building. She stopped once she entered the room. He could feel her gaze on his back as he finished putting away the clean dishes. 

When he turned to her, her eyes were puffy and red, as if she had been crying.

***

The water swirled around her feet as she walked down the beach a short way. The sound of the waves crashing against the nearby rocks, the roar of the ocean, and the cawing of the gulls helped to clear her mind. The effect was not quite as good as being in her garden back home sipping on a cup of tea, but it was close. As she listened and walked, feeling the sand shifting beneath her toes, sliding out from  
underneath her feet with the ever-receding wave, she felt her path clear in a way she had never remembered before. 

The child had muddled everything, had drawn her attention to something she had already conceded in her quest for her position. She was foolish to think the world would change enough to allow her to have both. Her predecessor had said as much, has prepared them all for the reality of their situation as Magic Knights.

What had she been holding on to for so long? 

She rubbed her hand over her belly, trying to sense the flow of mana through her, only to be met by a hole of nothingness. 

Did she want this? With or without him? Could she handle it herself? Would she want to?

She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. 

He didn't want it; that much was painfully clear. 

"Foolish." She looked back to the water once more, taking in a deep breath of the sea air. She turned back to the house, nestled on a low outcropping of rocks jutting out from the cliff which rose behind it. She had to tell him. The weight of knowledge pulled her down, drowning in the depths of her uncertainty. The feeling was all too familiar. 

She strode purposefully across the sand before her resolve wavered once more. 

When she entered the house, he was still in the kitchen. He stopped for a moment, having noticed her entrance but finished washing the dishes before he turned to her. His face was stoic, unreadable when he met her eyes, but the white-knuckle grip he had on the small towel said everything his face could not.

"Yami." She cleared her throat, hoping to make her voice louder than the thudding in her chest. "I'm pregnant." The thudding stopped entirely for what seemed a long moment waiting, hanging on a breath. His face was still stoic, unreadable, but his eyes darted from place to place as if he were looking for an opening to either attack or escape. Charlotte figured he would be looking for the latter.

"But don't worry. I... I'm going to end it." She nodded her head as the heartbeat resumed its normal, steady pace. Years of hiding lifted from her shoulders as if she had sloughed off the weight of the world with the statement. "I've been thinking for a while, trying to figure out what to do."

She looked up at him, feeling for the first time the tears on her cheeks. A small smile reflected the sense of peace in her mind at having finally said the words.

"But you're right. It isn't something either of us needs in our lives." She nodded her head again before brushing a tear from her cheek. His face had not changed when she looked at him again, but his hands had opened and lay flat against the countertop.

"I guess, what I'm saying is that you don't have to worry. I doubt I can get pregnant twice." Charlotte chuckled at the joke before taking a breath. The inscrutability of his gaze unnerved her. She crossed her arms over her chest and rubbed herself nervously.

"Yami? Say something."

***

Whatever he had expected when he looked up at her tear-stained face as she entered the kitchen, it had not been this. Her words echoed through his mind, blocking out everything else she was saying in a slurry of feelings he had never expected. His breath caught and his chest froze when she had said she was pregnant. The nervous, excited feeling of the dream, the feeling he tried so hard to convince himself was bad, blossomed within him. Despite everything he had said to her, to himself, as rationalization against the very thing which had happened, all the reasons why they should avoid it happening fled from his mind in a heartbeat.

But her next words flashed through him like an icy river. 

And he was tossed adrift once more, uncertain of what to think, of what he wanted.

Her soft relief filled smile seemed to him to hide a sadness she hadn't even recognized yet. But she had made up her mind, and he knew she was as stubborn as he was once her mind was made up. 

The look of nervous worry appeared on her face suddenly and Yami had to force the memory of the last few moments to replay in his mind. She had asked him something, but he couldn't remember what. 

"Whatever you choose to do, Charlotte. I'll stand with your decision."

She sighed and the sad, relieved smile returned to her face. She crossed the distance to him, sitting once more on the stool across the countertop. She placed her hands over his. He could sense a lightness in her he had not felt in her ki in years. He turned his hands beneath her and wrapped his fingers around her wrists. 

"Thank you." She squeezed his arms. "I had debated for so long, trying to figure out what I wanted, to guess what you might want."

Even her voice was lighter.

She reached over and brushed her fingers against his cheek.

"I love you, Yami."

He leaned his face into the gentle touch of her hand, his eyes drifting closed as her words bounced around his mind. When he opened his eyes, he could see her emotions written plainly on her face. The smile on her lips made her entire countenance sparkle and her ocean blue eyes dance. She had meant every word and more. 

He reached across to place his hand on her cheek, echoing her movement as she echoed his by leaning into the touch. He drew her chin across the table toward him and kissed her softly.

"Yeah. That." He whispered before kissing her again. She leaned into him, nibbling at his bottom lip before pulling away. A soft flush of desire brightened her face as she looked at him with hooded eyes. She licked her lips and her hand slipped from his cheek down his arm to his hand. She squeezed his fingers before standing up from the stool and turning away. 

Yami watched as she took a few steps, taking in the sway of her hips as she moved. The dress she wore clung to her body. The fabric was light and thin enough that it made him wonder why she bothered to get dressed at all. 

Charlotte stopped and turned to look at him over her shoulder. The look on her face beckoned him, as did her outstretched hand. Yami hurried around the counter and joined her. He slipped his hand in hers and brought her fingers to his lips as he let her led him to the bedroom. 

***

Charlotte's heart raced as the words tumbled out of her mouth. She hadn't meant to say it. She had never even thought about giving voice to the feeling she felt growing year after year, with every thought of him. 

But once they had left her lips, once they had seen the light of day, Charlotte could not deny the truth in them. The relief she felt was overwhelming.

His kiss had been gentle, yet it was one in which she felt she could get lost. His response--simple, indirect, yet so quintessentially him, filled her heart with more joy than she thought she could contain. She did not think he would ever say the words back to her; he would likely find every other way to tell her how he felt besides saying the words 'I love you'. 

And she was fine with that. She could tell how he felt in how he touched her face and how he kissed her until she could think of nothing but his lips against hers. 

His kiss was intoxicating and spurred her to action. She wanted him. Her body ached for him. Free now of his worry, she beckoned him to follow her, hoping he would be as eager to fill her as she was to be filled. 

A quick look over her shoulder and he was at her side. He brushed her knuckles with his lips, sending a jolt of desire through her. She could not get to the bedroom fast enough.

***

Three days flew by in a blur and Charlotte found herself reluctant to leave Yami's side. The air was so cold against her skin as she took to flight. She wished he was with her, wrapping his strong, warm arms around her. She wished she could lay her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat as he rubbed her back, insulating her from the chill. 

She shook her head and looked forward, refocusing her thoughts. She had left her squad to their own devices long enough. She trusted Mira, of course, at least to a great extent, but she knew her vice-captain would be far too lenient on the rest of the girls. She always gave them the benefit of the doubt, even when there was no doubt to be had. 

She had other thoughts on her mind as well, other plans to make. She needed to see Julius, to find some time to remove the spell. Whether he could reverse time enough to undo what had been done, Charlotte did not know. But reversing time was not the only way to end a pregnancy, she knew. 

She made a checklist in her mind of all the things she needed to do and of the information she needed to gather. The squad healer would know, or know of someone who could help her, Charlotte was sure. Once she had seen Julius, Charlotte made a note to visit Amberlynn to discuss matters. She thought about telling Mira too--the woman had been her best friend for a long time, but she paused at the thought. Amberlynn was a necessity, she reminded herself, while Mira... 

Charlotte shrugged, lamenting how her relationships had changed despite her efforts to avoid that very thing. 

She gripped the broom tightly, though she had no need. She could very well fly standing on a broom. She had even shown off once by flying the broom while balanced on one foot. She did not grip the broom handle out of a need to control her magic. Not in the least. But when she let it go, she could not keep her hands from shaking. 

She wished she could hold on to Yami's hands instead, but the broom would have to do. She could do nothing about the chill in the cool morning air, however. Sighing, she sped the broom forward toward her destination. 

***

Yami stirred and opened his eyes. He reached out in the bed only to have his arm met emptiness. Charlotte was gone, but the empty spot next to him still emanated her smell, her warmth. He rolled over into the spot, burying his face in the pillow there. He inhaled deeply, memorizing the scent of her before he sat up. He picked up a strand of hair she had left behind, rolling it between his fingers before he  
dropped it onto the floor as he stood. 

Standing, stretching, he wondered if she had taken an early walk on the beach. He made a mental note of the days and a heaviness settled into his heart. 

She had promised him three days, three nights. And now those days had been spent. 

He looked around the room for any sign of her, for any chance he could convince her to stay one more day. But she was gone. 

He had known she would be, and yet he still had looked.

"Stupid, silly." He took out a cigarette and tucked it between his lips. As he took the first long inhale on it, as the burning air filled his lungs and his eyes slid shut, the vision which had haunted him for the last year or more formed in his mind's eye. The beginning was the same as it had always been. The crowd of people, the pair of strange children looking at him with intense dark eyes. 

But something changed. The girl looked down at the other child. Her face looked sad. The pair disappeared, dissolving into a shower of petals before fading away altogether. 

A jolt of panic struck Yami and he turned to find Charlotte within the vision. 

When he saw her, the smile on her face was not the elated, exhausted smile he had come to expect. Could the thin, taut line her lips made up even be considered a smile? She was dressed for battle and when she turned to him the corner of her lips turned upward. Her face seemed as exhausted as he expected, but it was weary, pained instead of joyful. 

And when she turned away from him, she too dissolved into disappearing petals.

Yami opened his eyes and took another deep inhale. He frowned as he blew out the smoke. The waking dream had felt wrong. He could not describe it in any other way. He had not once seen the vision while they were together, not since she had told him anyway. 

She was pregnant. He would have never guessed. 

And she had decided to end it. He had convinced her having a child was a terrible idea.

But something about the dream and the pregnancy made him uneasy. 

He looked around the room, at all the places her things had been. He never expected to go so accustomed to her being around. But now she was gone, he felt a part of him was missing.

"All good things come to an end, I guess." He muttered aloud to no one in particular as he began retrieving his items and readied to leave.

The waking dream continued to haunt him. He needed to tell her, vowed to tell her about it even if it meant writing her a letter. 

Hopefully, she won't be too eager to act on her plan.

***

A few days after her return, after settling back in and fixing the messes which had been left for her to handle, Charlotte stood before a large stone building in the Capital. She had been in the building before many times, but never with the purpose which had called her to it today. 

She had decided.

He had agreed.

Right?

She stood before the door unmoving. She stared at the handle. 

One small tug. Easy.

And yet, her hand would not move to the door's handle.

What if Julius is out?

What if he is too busy?

Her mind filled with questions. Scenarios played through her mind. She placed her hand on her belly. The tiny void within her was deceptive, a ruse to hide the new life hidden from everyone, even sometimes from herself.

She had made the decision.

He had agreed.

But...

The thought made her sick to her stomach. The thought made her heartache and her eyes fill with tears. She squeezed them shut forcing them dry as the tears streaked her cheeks. 

She had had her reasons for not making a decision before. The more she thought about it, the more she felt she was wrong.

But she had made the decision.

And he had agreed.

He had convinced her.

She put her hand on the door handle, gripping it until her knuckles turned white. 

And still, she could not pull the door open.

After a moment, she let the handle go and took a step back. She turned away from the building. 

In a way, she knew Yami was right. The idea of having a child was ludicrous for them. 

And yet, she also knew she could not end it, she could not turn her back on it any more than she could turn her back on him.

She strode away from the building, confident in her decision. She might not want to bring this child into the world now, but she knew she wanted it, eventually, whether he agreed or not. 

Only, how was she supposed to tell him now?


End file.
